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Published 2022-02-27 (Image 192884)

I failed to keep my new years resolution, Minion. this will not end well. My resolution was to recognize your humanity. Wait … What was that, Boss? Youre not just another cog in my machine, Rudy. Youre not like my computer, my balance sheet, my three-year-old foreign coffee bean pickers … You have feelings. Your wellbeing is important to me. A happy minion means happy customers, and a happy me. Do you know what I mean, Minion? It means Im getting a raise? It means Im not going to call you minion this year. Im going to come up with something less demeaning to call you … or at least I was. But I already failed. Maybe next year, Minion. Very bad man.

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