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Rudy Park

Comics about wins and winning.

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61. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-10-07 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-10-07 Pub. Date: 2016-10-07
Image Number: 149322
Caption: It's the Ask Sadie Advice Hour. "John" in New York, you're on. What's your problem? House of Java Cybercafe. I keep thinking back to the first debate between Trump and crooked Hillary. The more I think about it, the more fantastic I think Trump did. He was strong. Tremendous. Big-league. Give it up, Donald! I know it's you! A real man can admit it when a girl mops the floor with him. Nobody mopped the floor with Trump! That's all a media conspiracy! Never happened!
     
62. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-10-02 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-10-02 Pub. Date: 2016-10-02
Image Number: 148594
Caption: Open Mike Night Presents Sadie Cohen in: "The Difference Between Us". You're all half a century younger than me … which makes me so very aflutter with glee. YOU think a smartphone makes you a big champ … but I saw Muhammad Ali. You think reading tweets lets you know somebody ... but each letter I read was caressed and indented and scented and carried the essence of whoever sent it. I'm trying to wake you from a "life" that's too thin! ... or, barring that, break you. Either way, win-win. Can you repeat that? I was watching Youtube. What's a "letter"?
     
63. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-09-30 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-09-30 Pub. Date: 2016-09-30
Image Number: 149041
Caption: Welcome to the "Ask Sadie" radio hour. You're on, Cleveland. What's YOUR problem?! My deadbeat brother-in-law won't leave. What do I do? For six months, he's been sleeping on my couch, watching my tv, and drinking my Dr. Pepper. Excellent question. It reminds me of the time Stalin liberated Eastern Europe and then didn't leave for 44 years. You're going to need a massive arms race, a containment strategy, and Sylvester Stallone. Now he's using my toothbrush.
     
64. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-09-17 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-09-17 Pub. Date: 2016-09-17
Image Number: 148490
Caption: Randy the Love Doctor. What ails you, brother? My wife wants us to renew our vows and have a big ceremony. But I'd rather save that money for retirement. Should I tell her to go take a hike? Of course. That way, there's a good chance you won't have to worry about retirement at all. Exactly ... Wait, what do you mean by that?
     
65. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-09-16 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-09-16 Pub. Date: 2016-09-16
Image Number: 148489
Caption: I've founded my own religion. Of course you have, Rudy. It's off to a good start. Already, it's being mocked by people of other faiths. If history's any guide, within a couple hundred years, it'll be widely accepted and people who don't believe in it will be persecuted. What are the central tenets of your religion? A true Rudian knows that life is suffering, and winning arguments online is salvation.
     
66. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-09-04 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-09-04 Pub. Date: 2016-09-04
Image Number: 147195
Caption: Today's man lesson is "The Art of Promising." I'm ready. Part one: Never … promise … anything. Wait … What do you mean? Pretend you're the lady, ask me to promise you something. Ok … (ahem) … Promise me you won't ever even look at another woman? A man would have to be crazy to look at another woman when he could be looking at the most beautiful woman in the world. And I'm not crazy. Notice, if you will, not only is there a complete absence of a promise ... there are also at least four iron-clad loopholes built in. Can you identify them? This is worse than math to me.
     
67. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-08-24 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-08-24 Pub. Date: 2016-08-24
Image Number: 147676
Caption: It looks like mankind only has 30 years till immortality. What are you going on about? That’s when we may be able to transfer our consciousness to non-biological hardware. Then we can live forever. 30 years. I'll still be here, so I'm going to live forever. But you'll already be long gone. Does it bother you that I'm going to be immortal and you're not? You're of the texting-while-driving generation. You won't be here in 30 years either. Joke's on you, they revoked my license.
     
68. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-08-19 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-08-19 Pub. Date: 2016-08-19
Image Number: 147401
Caption: Sorry, Rudy, no way can I raise your pay to $15 an hour. Why not? 'Cause that would destroy jobs. What would you do for a job once I moved the café to somewhere where people earn much less? If people earn much less, they won't be able to afford your products. Sweet, innocent Rudy. If there's one thing people love more than affording to buy stuff, it's buying stuff they can't afford.
     
69. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-07-29 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-07-29 Pub. Date: 2016-07-29
Image Number: 146486
Caption: I'm really upset about Hillary Clinton's vice presidential pick. I was hoping she'd pick someone who's really exciting. Like Donald Trump. Imagine if she chose Donald Trump as her VP. Hmm … Nobody's ever done anything like that before. She'd win all her own voters, plus any Trump voters who aren't paying enough attention when they punch those little holes. She'd have to find someone willing to change his name to "Donald Trump," but Craigslist is full of people who'll do anything. We really should host our own political show.
     
70. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-07-15 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-07-15 Pub. Date: 2016-07-15
Image Number: 145832
Caption: "Ask Sadie Advice Hour," what's your problem?! The other day, my grandpa tried driving to the corner store but got lost and ended up at the beach, six states away. How do I get him to realize it's time to stop driving without hurting his feelings? Excellent question. It reminds me of the time in 1863 when Grandpappy Cohen accidentally led a caravan of zoo-bound pelicans onto a field at Gettysburg. One particularly panicky pelican escaped and distracted General Lee, and the rest is history. Um ... Ok ...
     
71. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-06-23 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-06-23 Pub. Date: 2016-06-23
Image Number: 144912
Caption: I guess you're pretty disappointed about Bernie Sanders. Why would I be? He'll win next time. Next time? Do you know how old he is? Yes. I remember being that age. I thought I knew it all. I was so headstrong. I didn't know the meaning of the word "pretendtocompromise." Not sure that's a word, Mort. Now I try to always add "You have a point, but ... " before I castigate someone.
     
72. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-06-17 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-06-17 Pub. Date: 2016-06-17
Image Number: 144578
Caption: Hello, this is Hillary Clinton. Oh. I'm Mortimer Park. As you know, I have won the Democratic party's nomination for President of the United States. I don't think so … and as a former Bernie Sanders supporter, it is in your best interest to work just as hard to help me win in the fall. House of Java Cybercafe. You haven't actually won yet, though. Winning is just a formality.
     
73. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-06-14 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-06-14 Pub. Date: 2016-06-14
Image Number: 144575
Caption: Sadie, how can I convince my husband that a vacation is worth paying for? Excellent question. In my day, vacations were an essential component of a successful marriage. I would get two weeks a year to don a bikini, sit on a tropical beach amidst coconuts and oiled-up cabana boys, and recharge my yelling voice. And he would stay home working and have two weeks to live in dread of my imminent return. It was a win-win situation, really. What were we talking about again? Um ... nothing. Thanks.
     
74. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-06-11 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-06-11 Pub. Date: 2016-06-11
Image Number: 144242
Caption: I'll admit, yesterday I was off my game. I made a rookie mistake and you bested me, nemesis. But I'll take comfort in the fact that the internet has ruined your ability to convert short-term memories into long-term ones. Today's Special Latte + 1hr web $12.50. You won't recall minute details of your day ... All you'll remember are the parts that stick out most, such as me yelling ... you're such a loser! Joke's on you, I won't even remember that.
     
75. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-05-16 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-05-16 Pub. Date: 2016-05-16
Image Number: 143350
Caption: I told you Donald Trump was going to be the Republican nominee. You called it, Randy. But he has no chance of winning the presidency. Way too many people hate the guy. That's why he's going to win. Read "Randy's Guide to Life as an Alpha," Chapter 18 … "If you can't make them love you, make them love to hate you." I really need to buy your books.
     
76. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-04-28 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-04-28 Pub. Date: 2016-04-28
Image Number: 142430
Caption: I keep reading all these stories about virtual reality nookie. It just sounds horrible. It takes all the best parts of it: Seeing someone for the first time … blushing at the thought of holding her hand … Working up the courage to approach her … seeing her pretend to answer her phone and talk so you won't say hello ... Maybe the technology would be good for some people ... taking five years to work up the courage to approach someone new ...
     
77. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-04-19 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-04-19 Pub. Date: 2016-04-19
Image Number: 142131
Caption: Hi, this is John Kasich. Oh. I'm Mortimer Park. I'm calling to remind you I'm still running for "Just-In-Case." "Just-In-Case"? Yes. If Trump doesn't get enough delegates to win on the first ballot, the GOP can choose whomever it wants for president. It could choose Mitt Romney. It could choose Paul Ryan. It could even choose Kim Kardashian. House of Java Cybercafe. You are running for "Just-In-Case." Also, it says here you've got a bum ticker. Could you let your wife know I like long walks on the beach?
     
78. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-04-18 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-04-18 Pub. Date: 2016-04-18
Image Number: 142130
Caption: You're on "Ask Sadie." What's your problem?! Super delegates. A candidate could win the most votes in the primaries but lose anyway of the superdelegates want someone else! Can you believe that? Oh stop yer sniveling. In my day, the parties chose candidates in smoke-filled backrooms without even pretending the people get a vote. At least this charade gets you out of the house. Gets the blood pumping. I guess.
     
79. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-04-03 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-04-03 Pub. Date: 2016-04-03
Image Number: 140631
Caption: I think it's time this café showed its commitment to LGBT rights. Ok. How, boss? Well, there's all this controversy over whether to allow people who are transgender to choose which restroom they want to use. And I think the whole discussion is demeaning and insulting to them. It's divisive. We should all be coming together to recognize that now matter what we are - male, female, or whatever - we're all one people. That's why I'm eliminating the bathrooms altogether, and putting a bucket out in the alley. The immense amount of money I'll save on water, paper towels, and toilet maintenance has nothing to do with this. I assume I'll win some sort of award for this. Very bad man.
     
80. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-04-01 win 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-04-01 Pub. Date: 2016-04-01
Image Number: 141149
Caption: It's the "Ask Sadie" advice hour. "Holden" in Dallas, you're on. What's your problem?! I've been trying to get my wife to watch "The Expanse" on Syfy channel, but she refuses to even give it a chance. She won't watch any of my favorite shows with me. What can I do? YOU CAN GET A LIFE. Or you can continue to bug her about your tv shows, she can leave you for a romantic, oiled-up helicopter pilot, and you can watch your shows with your pet goldfish. I don't have a goldfish.
     
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