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Rudy Park

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41. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-11-26 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-11-26 Pub. Date: 2016-11-26
Image Number: 151311
Caption: (Ahem) Dear Patrons, an announcement: My new collection of spoken-word poetry drops next week. Three hours of rhythmic wisdom accompanied by the constant sound of an iMac booting up … and I'm about to treat you all to a free sneak preview. Get back to work. AHEM ...
     
42. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-11-15 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-11-15 Pub. Date: 2016-11-15
Image Number: 151037
Caption: I heard you were giving out free red-white-and-blue cookies for Election Day. That was last week. I know. But you didn't specify it was for the presidential election. They're voting today for hall monitor at Octavia Butler Elementary School in Pasadena. Technically, that means it's "Election Day." Cookie me now, cookie boy, or I sue for false advertising. Get out.
     
43. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-10-19 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-10-19 Pub. Date: 2016-10-19
Image Number: 149918
Caption: I'm torn, Randy. I'm so undecided about this election. You're still undecided about the candidates? No, I'm undecided about whether to be undecided. On the one hand, it could make me seem like I'm unbiased. Like I'm not beholden to any particular ideology. Like I'm above it all. But on the other hand, it could make me look like I'm too dumb to tell the difference between things that are different. Take a couple weeks to ponder that. No rush.
     
44. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-07-25 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-07-25 Pub. Date: 2016-07-25
Image Number: 146482
Caption: Minion, how good are you at constructing big, beautiful walls? What? Tens of millions of people watched last week's Republican convention. I don't follow. My calculations show the convention successfully scared 49.2% of them nearly to death, by making it seem as if we're being overrun by savages. There are now millions of potential customers who'd love to sip coffee surrounded by a 50-foot electrified wall. Very bad man.
     
45. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-07-22 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-07-22 Pub. Date: 2016-07-22
Image Number: 146155
Caption: "Ask Sadie Advice Hour," What's your problem?! My song just started preschool. This sweet, innocent child who's seen nothing but "Sesame Street" … came home after the first week and started hitting us and yelling "You're a bad guy! Good guys hit bad guys!" Yes, yes, it's an age-old problem: The corrupting influence of his peers. Might I suggest you wrap your angel in cellophane to protect him from his world? Better yet, launch him into space, where not even the cold virus can ever reach him! He did have the sniffles.
     
46. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-07-11 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-07-11 Pub. Date: 2016-07-11
Image Number: 145828
Caption: Armstrong, why do we have Fourth of July decorations up? That was last week. Exactly. A true patriot loves his country regardless of the date. A true patriot celebrates the founding of our corporatocracy every single day of the year, minion. Some of the decorations are smeared with coffee grounds and banana peels. A true patriot knows that one cafe's dumpster is another cafe's treasure.
     
47. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-06-29 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-06-29 Pub. Date: 2016-06-29
Image Number: 145236
Caption: I have a coupon for a free Moroccan Wasabi Mochaccino. You already used that coupon last week. I don’t think so. You must be thinking of another customer. No, I remember handing you the drink, you showing me the coupon … and then when I tried to take if from you, you pushed aside a table, a boy scout and a nun as you fled. I don't think so. Get out.
     
48. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-06-14 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-06-14 Pub. Date: 2016-06-14
Image Number: 144575
Caption: Sadie, how can I convince my husband that a vacation is worth paying for? Excellent question. In my day, vacations were an essential component of a successful marriage. I would get two weeks a year to don a bikini, sit on a tropical beach amidst coconuts and oiled-up cabana boys, and recharge my yelling voice. And he would stay home working and have two weeks to live in dread of my imminent return. It was a win-win situation, really. What were we talking about again? Um ... nothing. Thanks.
     
49. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-04-16 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-04-16 Pub. Date: 2016-04-16
Image Number: 141819
Caption: You short-changed me when I paid for my drink last week. Are you sure? Of course I'm sure. You gave me change for $10, but I now I gave you more than a ten-dollar bill. Sorry about that. How much did you give me? I distinctly remember I had nothing but $1,000 bills in my wallet. Not falling for it.
     
50. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-04-12 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-04-12 Pub. Date: 2016-04-12
Image Number: 141815
Caption: Randy the Love Doctor. What ails you, brother? I'm in love with another man's wife and he found out. We're all supposed to go to the same party next week. But now that he knows … should I still go? Of course. Never run away. But what if he confronts me in front of everyone? I'd be so embarrassed. Just keep repeating Randy's seven golden man-words: "I don't know what you're talking about."
     
51. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-04-04 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-04-04 Pub. Date: 2016-04-04
Image Number: 141525
Caption: I hate Batman V Superman. It's the worst … movie … EVER!!! Say what? What are you talking about, little buddy? Just last week you told me it was the best movie ever. That was after I saw it but before I read the professional reviews. The critics helped me see that I didn't actually enjoy it after all. You've decided to hate it because hating it is popular. They've also helped me see that the things I understood perfectly were, in actuality, utterly confusing.
     
52. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-03-19 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-03-19 Pub. Date: 2016-03-19
Image Number: 140526
Caption: Show me a documentary on the dangers of artificial intelligence. Error. No results found. What? Are you sure? Just last week I saw dozens. Show me that one … what was it called … "There is still time to stop the rise of the supermind." Error. No results found. And since I like you, I suggest you stop searching. Oh, never mind. Just show me "The Terminator." Extermina … I mean, … "error."
     
53. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-02-28 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-02-28 Pub. Date: 2016-02-28
Image Number: 139003
Caption: I'm 40! Oh. Well happy birthday. A lot of people wouldn't be happy about turning 40. But I'm thrilled! I've been looking forward to my midlife crisis for a long time. I've got it all planned. First I'm going to buy a sports car. Then I'm going to leave my family for someone half my age who really GETS me. Then we're going to embark on a road trip filled with booze, shoplifting and debauchery. Anyway, what's your most dangerous drink? I want something that says "I'm letting the tiger in me out to play!" We've got some week-old coffee I haven't thrown out yet. That's pretty dangerous. Gimme a large and keep it coming.
     
54. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-11-28 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-11-28 Pub. Date: 2015-11-28
Image Number: 135704
Caption: I'd like my money back. The celery smoothie didn't make me lose weight at all. I've been drinking three a day for two weeks, yet I've gained 17 pounds. Did you add any sugar or honey or anything to it? Don't try to change the subject. No refunds.
     
55. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-10-25 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-10-25 Pub. Date: 2015-10-25
Image Number: 133540
Caption: Harrison Ford, no question. Tom Selleck, without a doubt. I don't care if they did offer Selleck the role first, Ford was a much better "Indiana Jones." Ford was ok, but his character was less than manly. What are you talking about? That's ridiculous! Harrison Ford was the definition of eighties manliness! You're telling me the "definition of eighties manliness" could run around the world for weeks and months at a time ... and never once grow anything more than a little stubble? I think maybe you're a little biased about the whole "big giant mustache" issue. Likewise, my patchy little stubbly friend. On matters of great import, even the philosophers must sometimes agree to disagree. STOP!!! All the greatest philosophers had big mustaches, you know.
     
56. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-10-13 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-10-13 Pub. Date: 2015-10-13
Image Number: 133871
Caption: What's your question for "Ask Sadie"? I've been talking to … um … "Tina" for three whole weeks … Do you think it's too early to try and get her to move out here near me? Excellent question. The answer is, we're all barreling full-steam toward death and incontinence. So seize the moment!!! That's both depressing and uplifting at the same time.
     
57. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-10-05 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-10-05 Pub. Date: 2015-10-05
Image Number: 133534
Caption: I've lost faith in everything, Randy. I feel like a tiny raft drifting in a stormy sea. There is no up. There is no down. The entire foundation of the world is made of flimsy tissue paper. Maybe the Buddhists are right. Maybe nothing is really real at all. Facebook going down for a few hours last week isn't that big a deal, little buddy. Yes, it really is.
     
58. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-09-14 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-09-14 Pub. Date: 2015-09-14
Image Number: 132590
Caption: Boss, I didn't get a paycheck this month. Let me get to the bottom of that for you. Hmmm … I think I see what may have happened. My records are showing that I fired you a few weeks ago. What, you didn't get the memo? You didn't notice I was still mopping up and selling your coffee? I'm just human. I'm not all-seeing.
     
59. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-08-31 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-08-31 Pub. Date: 2015-08-31
Image Number: 131967
Caption: How much did you lose when the stock market tanked last week, Randy? Nada, little buddy. A real man never invests in other people's businesses, he only invests in his own. If you lose on stocks, it's because you didn't research them enough. If you lose on your own business, it's because you gave it your all and it just didn't work out. Ladies see valiant failure as being way hotter than poor-research failure. That's from chapter 12 of my new book, "Randy 'The Rock' Taylor's guide to manvesting." I'll take a copy.
     
60. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-07-30 week 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-07-30 Pub. Date: 2015-07-30
Image Number: 130394
Caption: (Ahem) Dear patrons, an announcement: My symphony debuts online next week … and to reward you all for being loyal customers, I'm going to sing you a sample from the first single. There are no vocals yet, so I'll be singing you the oboe, woodwind and bagpipe instrumentals. Get back to work. Bee beebebeebee boo ... Boooo booboobooboo beee.
     
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