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Rudy Park

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1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-09-22 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-09-22 Pub. Date: 2018-09-22
Image Number: 174111
Caption: For health reasons, we'll be watching only two hours a day of pre-election tv coverage. Oh, snookums … How sweet. You're so worried about me getting overly-taxed by intense political debate. Pshaw! That pipsqueak Olbermann gives me hives and Hannity is so physically hunky and so amazingly stupid that he confuses my hormones. I'm talking about my health, geezer! Too late, old bag! You just admitted you love me as much as I love you!
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-08-06 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-08-06 Pub. Date: 2018-08-06
Image Number: 173394
Caption: Over the last decade we've chronicled modern life through the joys and tribulations of the Rudy Park gang. They've lent us a window into the key issues of the day, from politics to nutrition to the way our whole world is shaped by HBO's programming choices. But we've been remiss. Somehow, in all this time, we've never had a storyline involving a secret scandalous videotape of a major character's illicit past. This week, we humbly make amends. We recommend that the more squeamish among you spend this week instead reading US magazine, or watching C-Span or whatever else your weak-kneed sensibilities require. Stay tuned ...
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-28 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-28 Pub. Date: 2018-06-28
Image Number: 172519
Caption: What do you think of my idea for non-violent protests of Arizona's onerous immigration laws? Outdated. But - This is the era of MMA - Martial Arts Brawls, pay-per-view battles to submission. If you're mad at Arizona, challenge it to a cage match until one of the other of you breaks your forearm!!! Know your audience. I'll pay $16 to watch you wrestle Arizona's governor.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-19 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-19 Pub. Date: 2018-06-19
Image Number: 172383
Caption: I've had four espresso shots and a red bull. Look out post office, here comes Sadie! Post office? You're fueling up so you have the strength to endure the long lines? Ha. I'm creating the lines. I get to the counter with a stack of complicated questions, then watch the people behind me go nuts with frustration! Bwah-ha-ha-ha!!! One of the best maniacal laughs in the business.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-15 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-15 Pub. Date: 2018-06-15
Image Number: 172244
Caption: I got a tip about a huge geological calamity that's about to happen across the bridge. This story could make my site famous. Could you watch my boy while I go cover it? 'Course, bruh. For $4,000. Cool … what? I been reading Trump's Art of the Deal. It say if a brotha want something bad enough, charge him fifty times your usual fee. Are you sure that's in there? I demand to know what page. Ok. How much that information worth to you?
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-14 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-14 Pub. Date: 2018-06-14
Image Number: 172243
Caption: Remember Rudy Park, my college roommate? He just tipped me off to breaking news. Some geological disaster across the bridge. Wow. You should totally go cover that. I'm glad you think so, 'cause it wouldn't really be responsible to take a 2-year-old to a geological disaster. Could you watch my boy for a few days? On second thought, that's a boring story. Nobody wants to hear about that. He's almost potty trained. Sorry, I have a ... work ... ish thing.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-28 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-28 Pub. Date: 2018-04-28
Image Number: 170880
Caption: Don't tell anyone, but I'm pretty sure I saw a TR-38 last night. I was lounging on my roof, bathed in the supple blue glow of my iPad, iPhone, Kindle, Apple Watch, laptop and mini TV. Like ususal. Suddenly, I had the inexplicable urge to turn them all off. That's when it came into view: A huge, black, triangle floating right over me. It began to vibrate, and suddenly a single thought was projected into my head. "Keep at least one of these things off please. Your gigantic wattage is messing with our warp drive." Could've been swamp gas.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-02 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-02 Pub. Date: 2018-04-02
Image Number: 170204
Caption: Today's lesson for the lustful man is called Do As the Ladies Do. Part One: The Look. If you spot someone who's super-hot, don't stare. Look away and watch her using your peripheral vision only. You'll find peripheral vision exercises on page 47 of my new book: How to survive and thrive in the #Metoo era. It's the latest in my best-selling Randy's MANuals series. Available in bookstores and mancaves near you.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-03-16 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-03-16 Pub. Date: 2018-03-16
Image Number: 169409
Caption: Boss? I got a memo saying you want me to stop looking t so many Sirius Disclosure videos on Youtube. The past few days, you and your online girlfriend have been frequenting those videos and the associated Facebook group. Has it occurred to you that if we really do have contact with aliens ... if there really are twelve races, including reptilians who sign your payche - I mean, who control everything - that there's a reason they're keeping all this a secret? Very. Bad. Man. I've compiled a playlist of cat videos you're free to watch.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-02-12 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-02-12 Pub. Date: 2018-02-12
Image Number: 168441
Caption: Youtube just made it impossible for me to earn a living from my channel! How so? It used to be you needed 10,000 views of your videos, and then they'd start running ads on your channel. Now you need 4,000 hours of watch-time and 1,000 subscribers! It took me a year to get 10,000 views, and then the bottom drops out! I'm missing out on $400/year now, according to Social Blade. Have you ever heard something that you just know would've made zero sense if you'd heard it ten years ago? First Facebook changed the algorithms, now this!
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-02-06 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-02-06 Pub. Date: 2018-02-06
Image Number: 168187
Caption: I really miss being in a committed relationship, Randy. Which part do you miss most? Having someone disagree with you over what you're going to eat, or over what tv shows you're going to watch? Or do you miss having to account for how you spend your time? Or having to explain why you bought yourself something awesome without first getting permission? Mostly I miss the back rubs. They don't ask you to wash the dishes first at massage parlors.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-12-30 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-12-30 Pub. Date: 2017-12-30
Image Number: 166544
Caption: John Barth wrote "Everyone is necessarily the hero of his own life story." That he did, little buddy. But what if a person spends most of his life watching tv, films, Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, etc? What if my -- I mean, this person's -- life story is watching other people's life stories? Does that make other people the hero of this person's story? Sometimes I don't know where I end and Kanye begins. That'd be somewhere around Kim Kardashian.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-12-05 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-12-05 Pub. Date: 2017-12-05
Image Number: 165716
Caption: It's the Ask Sadie Advice Hour. Weepy in Wisconsin, you're on. What's your problem?! House of Java.net cybercafe. I just read the most beautiful poem ever. It's called On Children, by Kahlil Gibran. I have two babies myself, and after reading that, I just can't stop weeping. When your babies are teenagers they'll wreck your car, steal your watch, and be ashamed to be seen with you. There. Have you stopped crying yet, loser? Still crying. Different reason. You're welcome. Next caller!
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-22 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-22 Pub. Date: 2017-11-22
Image Number: 165178
Caption: Disney's trying to buy Fox. If they did that, then all of Marvel's best heroes would be in the MCU. It would be horrible! The whole Marvel cinematic universe is one big story told by dozens of movies. This would, like, triple the amount of movies I'd have to watch! I'd have to watch every X-Men spinoff to make sure I got every reference made in any Thor or Avengers movie, for instance. HOJ. Your definition of "have to" and my definition of "have to" are very different. I'd have to see them all in 3-D. I'd have to get a second job to afford that.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-15 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-15 Pub. Date: 2017-11-15
Image Number: 164884
Caption: I closed all my rings yesterday, Randy! What do you mean? On my Apple Watch. If you move enough, stand enough and work out enough during the day, colorful rings close on the watch face. I see. Impressive, little buddy. What'd you do, go for a long run? Do 100 situps? An hour of cardio? Fun fact, totally not related: If the watch notices you're not moving, standing or working out it lowers the amount of time it takes to close the rings. Less impressive.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-10-18 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-10-18 Pub. Date: 2017-10-18
Image Number: 163917
Caption: I can watch tv anywhere I bet that blows your mind. Why's that, loser? Tap tap tap tap. Because in your day, a televisions was a 5-ton steam-powered machine. You had to crank a handle to make it run … and "running" meant a curtain would open and two old-timey people in the box would act out a silent tv show. Wait ... are you trying to insult me ... or are you getting your history from Youtube again? "Buck-Naked Historian" has 5 million subscribers, so it must be accurate.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-09-07 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-09-07 Pub. Date: 2017-09-07
Image Number: 162351
Caption: Gimme a hot chocolate. On the rocks. Straight. Lady troubles? And how. Old Mr. Mort told me if I wanted to appeal to the ladies, I should watch some old black and white movies and do what those guys do. So I started jogging downstairs sideways like Cary Grant. I said "see!" after every sentence like James Cagney. I ran in place and yelled "whoop-whoop-whoop!" like Curly. All the girls loved it. But now I have four playdates scheduled at the same time! Not at all where I thought that was going.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-20 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-20 Pub. Date: 2017-08-20
Image Number: 161181
Caption: Get outta here I'm busy! Got outta here I'm busy! Open Mike Night Presents Kids 3-5. Watch what you want! Watch what you want! Got my glock, an' my dollars, got my glock and' my dollars! A got seven baby mamas, I got seven baby mamas! All them (censored) on my (censored). All them (censored) on my (censored). Okay, thank you! Lots of talent here tonight, so let's keep it moving. And parents, pay attention to what your three-year-olds are watching. Okay, who's next?
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-07-05 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-07-05 Pub. Date: 2017-07-05
Image Number: 159993
Caption: It's the Ask Sadie Advice Hour. "Trekfan" in Dallas, you're on. What's your problem?! House of Java Cybercafe. I've been trying to get my wife to watch sci-fi with me. But she's so closed-minded about it. Everything that I find so profound and beautiful about it, she finds silly. STOP TRYING TO CHANGE YOUR WIFE INTO A XEROX COPY OF YOURSELF! Right now you relationship is based on the kind of incompatibility that leads to resentment, recrimination and bickering. Enjoy that. You'd make a great Klingon.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-05-07 watch 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-05-07 Pub. Date: 2017-05-07
Image Number: 157127
Caption: I've traveled back through time to warn: The aliens are here. Open Mike Night Presents Future Guy. They hitched rides in on Halley's Comet every time it's near. Living nanites masquerading as technology … depending on the gullibility of you and me. 200,000 years of riding horses and buggies ... and suddenly we're 3-D printing tools and cars and trees? They're everywhere, just biding time to finish their big plan. They're in your phones, your watch, your cars, and they are nearly done. The brain ... the AI ... will arrive ... in 2061. (July 28th to be exact ... that, my crew is a natural fact). I'm warning you this way 'cause it's the only way, you see. For some reason, they get confused by rhymes and poetry. In short, I've come to warn you, evolution's happening. You want your kids to survive it? Teach them how to rap ... pening. That was close. Odd ... my phone lit up for no reason, and then went back to sleep.
     
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