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The True Comic Strips

gathered from over thirty leading newspaper comic strips.

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181. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-04-09 true 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-04-09 Pub. Date: 2015-04-09
Image Number: 125277
Caption: I heard you've to an awful, mysterious pain in the side of your face. Yeah. You can try the modern approach, drug yourself silly so you don't feel the pain. You know a better way, Sadie? Well, in your case, I'd suggest going with the tried and true cure-all: Drill a hole in your head to let out the demons. No need. You're already out. That's ... Well-played, nemesis. Well-played.
     
182. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-04-08 true 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-04-08 Pub. Date: 2015-04-08
Image Number: 125276
Caption: Your face is still hurting? You'd better get that checked. Maybe it'll go away. House of Java.net Cybercafe. True. Or maybe it'll turn into something a lot worse because you didn't get it checked today. It could be nothing, but it could also be nerve damage. Or an infection in your gums. You could lose all your teeth, little buddy. How'd you like to try paying for implants on minimum wage? That sounds awesome. Can they be bionic? "Matter-Eater Lad" was my favorite superhero.
     
183. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-03-01 true 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-03-01 Pub. Date: 2015-03-01
Image Number: 122758
Caption: They never call, they never write … Open mike night presents Sadie Cohen. They come but once a year. I worked and slaved, I diapered them … but they don't seem to care. True, it's clear I'll control their lives, if they should get too near. Grown kids are planets, on their own. But mother's still the sun. If they don't call this week, I'll go supernova on their behinds. That doesn't rhyme!
     
184. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-02-28 true 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-02-28 Pub. Date: 2015-02-28
Image Number: 123401
Caption: I've figured out what true love is, Clyde: it's when someone would never dream of changing you. Thug 4 Life. It's when someone likes all you annoying habits and mannerisms … … Because that's what makes you you. Thank God For Culture Clash. Thug 4 Life. What if trying to change YOU is the other person's annoying habit? Thank God For Culture Clash. Thug 4 Life. (This cartoon was originally published on 2013-01-26).
     
185. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-02-27 true 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-02-27 Pub. Date: 2015-02-27
Image Number: 123400
Caption: If mankind is all alone in the universe, then it's even more important to get out into space. Don’t you see, Susan … If that were true, then all those stars and all those planets give out species a purpose. It's out purpose to populate the universe. It's my theory that most guy philosophies sound like pickup lines. (This cartoon was originally published on 2013-01-25).
     
186. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-02-22 true 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-02-22 Pub. Date: 2015-02-22
Image Number: 122492
Caption: Rudy Park Enterprises is proud to announce its own Sadie Cohen has been selected as most obnoxious and caustic radio host of the year. Speech, speech!!! You're too kind. Obviously, every girl dreams of getting this kind of recognition. I'm well aware it's customary to thank everyone who made this moment possible. It's true I might not have won if it weren't for the lifeless jerks and imbeciles who listen to the show and write in with their stupid email questions. But you are all beneath contempt. The only person I want to thank is Rudy Park. Your shallow and insipid existence inspires me every single day. Can I tweet that?
     
187. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-02-15 true 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-02-15 Pub. Date: 2015-02-15
Image Number: 122416
Caption: This just in: According to scientists, it is not yet 2016. Hold on … Yes, ok … Sources are telling us that if this turns out to be true, it could have profound implications. Theoretically, it would mean that our leaders could spend this year actually accomplishing things. Wait, I'm being told ... Ok, sources claim it would also mean politicians don't have to demonize people on the other side of the aisle yet. Congress is already weighing in on this stunning development. They've issued a joint statement saying "We're not scientists, so we don't know one way or another if this crazy 'theory' is true." We at the nightly news should stress that the theory is so far unconfirmed. And frankly we're not sure we buy it either.
     
188. Comic Strip Greg Evans  Luann 2015-02-15 true 
Cartoonist(s): Greg Evans
Comic/Cartoon: Luann
Viewable Date: 2015-02-15 Pub. Date: 2015-02-15
Image Number: 122138
Caption: Hi, girls! Look at all the Valentines I got! You're saying that bag is full of Valentines? I bet it's full of paper she's taking to the recycle bin. Ooo! Envy! How many Valentines did you get? One. From my only true love, Quill. 8,329. Tiffany! Mind takin' this? You said you were goin' to recycle papers, right? No! I said, "I really like my neighbors". Ooo! Major ego save. She's a pro.
     
189. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-02-14 true 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-02-14 Pub. Date: 2015-02-14
Image Number: 122757
Caption: I can't stand old "Star Trek." There's just way too much talking and not enough blowing stuff up. Well, your problem, little buddy, is you didn't give it enough time to grow on you. You're judging it superficially. Not true. I've seen every single episode of every series and all the movies in the last five hours. Fast-forwarding through things doesn't count as "watching" them. I think it was Shakespeare who said "a meadow that isn't just as lovely from the window of a bullet train isn't lovely at all."
     
190. Comic Strip Signe Wilkinson  Family Tree 2009-12-04 true 
Cartoonist(s): Signe Wilkinson
Comic/Cartoon: Family Tree
Viewable Date: 2015-01-29 Pub. Date: 2009-12-04
Image Number: 41485
Caption: Go away. I'm writing a poem on the fragility of mother earth. That'll help. Take chemistry and math if you want to save the environment. You don't need to know anything about science to tell people how to live better lives. True. You could be a congressman. Congressperson ... and good idea.
     
191. Comic Strip Brian Crane  Pickles 2015-01-22 true 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2015-01-22 Pub. Date: 2015-01-22
Image Number: 121441
Caption: Nelson, did you know that your gramma is always right? Oh, stop it, Earl! I've never claimed that I'm always right. That's true, but she's never denied it, either.
     
192. Comic Strip Mike Twohy  That's Life 2003-12-13 true 
Cartoonist(s): Mike Twohy
Comic/Cartoon: That's Life
Viewable Date: 2015-01-21 Pub. Date: 2003-12-13
Image Number: 6039
Caption: Tell-Alls. Tell- Somes.
     
193. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-18 true 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-18 Pub. Date: 2015-01-18
Image Number: 120915
Caption: It's the Fad Herald. Please say hoverboards are in. Hear ye, today, a special announcement. The following is now in: Totally ignoring that we're now living in the year depicted in the movie "Back to the Future, part 2." Out: Any observation about what's come true: 3D movies, tablet computers, video conferencing, wall-mounted, wide-screen TVs that display multiple channels at once, being consumed by personal electronics and hoverboards. Um ... But I've been waiting 26 years to make those observations. Me too. Same here. And I've been waiting 26 years to mock everyone who does that. I'm not sure you got this one right, Fad Herald. Also out: Questioning what you're told. Oh. Sorry about that.
     
194. Comic Strip J.C. Duffy  Fusco Brothers 2015-01-14 true 
Cartoonist(s): J.C. Duffy
Comic/Cartoon: Fusco Brothers
Viewable Date: 2015-01-14 Pub. Date: 2015-01-14
Image Number: 120593
Caption: I know I dialed the wrong number, but I can tell you want to go out with me by your heavy breathing. Oh. I suppose that's true: an iron lung doesn't have a volume control.
     
195. Comic Strip Brian Crane  Pickles 2014-12-26 true 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2014-12-26 Pub. Date: 2014-12-26
Image Number: 120307
Caption: Did anyone ever tell you two that you both sound exactly alike? Yes, people tell us all the time that they can't tell our voices apart. That's true, but I had it first. Yeah, but I'll have it last.
     
196. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-12-24 true 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-12-24 Pub. Date: 2014-12-24
Image Number: 120665
Caption: You shoved a candy cane in my ear!! Ingrate. It's customary to thank someone when she gives you a Christmas gift. In my day, people would actually mail a handwritten letter to express their gratitude. But you young losers don't respect people enough to take time to do that. My ear!!! No, it's true.
     
197. Comic Strip Mike Lester  Mike du Jour 2014-12-20 true 
Cartoonist(s): Mike Lester
Comic/Cartoon: Mike du Jour
Viewable Date: 2014-12-20 Pub. Date: 2014-12-20
Image Number: 120301
Caption: So, Bosco, Mr Backwaks talked you into being The Elf on the Shelf ... Yep. Who snoops around the office ... Yep ... and reports back to "Santa" ... Yep. - And is out of a job the day after Christmas ... Ok, it's true. Now put on this New Year's Baby diaper and sash.
     
198. Comic Strip J.C. Duffy  Fusco Brothers 2014-12-05 true 
Cartoonist(s): J.C. Duffy
Comic/Cartoon: Fusco Brothers
Viewable Date: 2014-12-05 Pub. Date: 2014-12-05
Image Number: 118817
Caption: I understand your home state's motto is, "Virginia is for lovers." True. Unfortunately for you, yours is, "New Jersey is for lonely guys."
     
199. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-12-02 true 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-12-02 Pub. Date: 2014-12-02
Image Number: 119724
Caption: NOBODY TOUCH ME! Sweetie, I … NOBODY UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. A true hypochondriac does not play favorites. It's going to be a long winter.
     
200. Comic Strip Sam Hurt  Queen of the Universe 1990-12-24 true 
Cartoonist(s): Sam Hurt
Comic/Cartoon: Queen of the Universe
Viewable Date: 2014-12-02 Pub. Date: 1990-12-24
Image Number: 38026
Caption: As the time draws near, it all boils down to this - Family and friends gathering together to share that true holiday spirit … Hasbro swing set - front end loader - suzy - delux chemistry set for - speed trike - actions set - 4x4 truck - acme swing - ball - Barbie U.N. building - dinosaur set with - remote.
     
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