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Rudy Park

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Result page:    2  3  Next  (52 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-08-04 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-08-04 Pub. Date: 2018-08-04
Image Number: 173262
Caption: Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, What do you think of younger men? -kl. *(Actual reader letter) Ask Sadie at rudy@rudypark.com. Depends. Younger men have strong jaws and rock-hard abs, but they're missing the sexiest thing: they're not crotchety jerks, set in their ways, willing to argue about anything and say totally stupid things. Hey, doesn't that foul old wretch realize I've got rock-hard abs and a steel jaw?! (This cartoon was originally published on 2014-07-12)
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-14 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-14 Pub. Date: 2018-06-14
Image Number: 172243
Caption: Remember Rudy Park, my college roommate? He just tipped me off to breaking news. Some geological disaster across the bridge. Wow. You should totally go cover that. I'm glad you think so, 'cause it wouldn't really be responsible to take a 2-year-old to a geological disaster. Could you watch my boy for a few days? On second thought, that's a boring story. Nobody wants to hear about that. He's almost potty trained. Sorry, I have a ... work ... ish thing.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-12 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-12 Pub. Date: 2018-06-12
Image Number: 172241
Caption: Meanwhile at a café in neighboring Canardville … Have you gathered all the regulars and local animals two-by-two, minion? You were serious about that, boss? Totally unrelated topic: Let's say thousands of years ago, a big oil company was bribing a local shopkeeper to let them use his basement. Let's call him ... oh, I don't know ... Noah. Let's say big oil was using Noah's Cafe to conduct an illegal fracking operation. Let's say this type of mining is ... a tad risky ... and let's say big oil assured Noah that his cafe would be the one place in town that wouldn't cave in. Very very bad man.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-09 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-09 Pub. Date: 2018-06-09
Image Number: 172100
Caption: What's your contingency plan, Randy? My what? If a calamity of biblical proportions were to strike here in Canardville, would you flee across the bridge to Candorville? Or would you search in vain for a fallout-resistant bunker, before surrendering to the cruel inevitability of your demise? I ask just for the sake of discussion. No reason to panic. Totally unrelated: I just found out someone who's definitely not me is selling fallout bunkers at buy-this-now-if-you-want-to-live.com. Very bad man.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-05-31 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-05-31 Pub. Date: 2018-05-31
Image Number: 171960
Caption: Archeologists found a set of 9.7-million-year-old teeth in Germany that might belong to a primitive relative of early man. Totally unrelated question: Are you missing any teeth, Sadie. That's funny. Speaking of which, there are many ways a person could lose teeth. Threats of violence aren't funny in 2018. That's like a rule. A good pummeling never hurt anyone.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-03-01 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-03-01 Pub. Date: 2018-03-01
Image Number: 168936
Caption: If you could change just one thing about yourself, what would it be? I'd totally wish to have my brain put into a robot body. That way I could live forever. Imagine living long enough to buy an iPhone 7000. Wrong answer. An alpha male never lets on that he's concerned about his mortality. You answer should have been nothing. That alpha male or female is not afraid of death, little buddy. I think I'd rather wait for the 7000-S. Stop it.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-02-21 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-02-21 Pub. Date: 2018-02-21
Image Number: 168668
Caption: How can you be so heartless?! I have half a mind to tweet about this! Pardon? A bus full of tiny orphan broke down down the hill. It was on the news. Yet you didn't offer them any food. How would this look for your café if you totally ignored them in their time of need? If you'd like to prepare some tuna croissants, I'd be more than happy to haul them down there for you. Not falling for it.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-02-04 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-02-04 Pub. Date: 2018-02-04
Image Number: 167390
Caption: I've been thinking about how out of control things have gotten, minion. This won't end well. This is a land of immigrants. But the republic elected a leader who says things like "Why are we having all these people from censored countries come here?" … A president who says we need more people form countries like Norway. Who said "Why do we need more Haitians? Take them out." ... A guy who said some of the white supremacists with torches in Charlottesville were very fine people." A guy who tweeted an image during his campaign that suggested the vast majority of white murder victims are killed by black people, when in reality they're mostly killed by white people. A guy who shouts about every single instance of Muslim terrorism, but was totally silent when the DOJ charged a white supremacist with terrorism ... but he's good on taxes for the 1%, so it evens out ... Get back to work, lackey, my gold coins won't polish themselves. Wait ... you were serious about that?
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-01-10 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-01-10 Pub. Date: 2018-01-10
Image Number: 167106
Caption: Boss, what if I told you I forgot to lock up last night and someone totally robbed us blind? I'd say now problem because of your contract. My contract? It allows me to auction off your less vital internal organs to recover any damages you cause me. You really should read the fine print before you sign papers, minion. I did. But I wrote in finer print that all fine print is null and void. Only the ruling class can use fine print, minion.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-15 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-15 Pub. Date: 2017-11-15
Image Number: 164884
Caption: I closed all my rings yesterday, Randy! What do you mean? On my Apple Watch. If you move enough, stand enough and work out enough during the day, colorful rings close on the watch face. I see. Impressive, little buddy. What'd you do, go for a long run? Do 100 situps? An hour of cardio? Fun fact, totally not related: If the watch notices you're not moving, standing or working out it lowers the amount of time it takes to close the rings. Less impressive.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-09-30 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-09-30 Pub. Date: 2017-09-30
Image Number: 163108
Caption: Randy, remember when the president went to the U.N. and talked about how unstable North Korea was? Yeah, that was right before he threatened to "totally destroy" North Korea. I see what you're getting at, little buddy. You think that was ironic. Yes. But what about Randy's axiom #67.1 ... "Unapologetic irony is the key to seduction. It breaks all rules of common sense and respect, and breaking rules is sexy." I didn't mean "sexy" in the hubba-hubba sense. Oh, good, because I was about to say, I didn't feel any hubbas at all.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-09-29 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-09-29 Pub. Date: 2017-09-29
Image Number: 163107
Caption: Hello, this is Congress. Oh. I'm Mortimer Park. I'd like to talk to you about Bernie Sanders' expanded Medicare for All plan. Oh, lovely. Before we start … totally unrelated question … How do you feel about the terms "Socialism," "government-run" and "death panels"? Do those scare you to death? House of Java Cybercafe. Not really. Hold on ... What about "Boo!" Isn't that a term of endearment now?
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-22 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-22 Pub. Date: 2017-08-22
Image Number: 161807
Caption: Charlottesville changed everything, Randy. How so, little buddy? It's totally changed how I argue with people online. For the last few years, insults like "beta" and "cuck" and "SJW" and "virtue-signaller" were trending, so I used them all the time. But I just read that racists just like those who rallied in Charlottesville are the ones who invented those terms to control discourse and make opposing bigotry seem lame. It's going to be a lot harder to win debates without making cogent arguments if I can't use those terms anymore. We all have to make sacrifices.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-05-15 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-05-15 Pub. Date: 2017-05-15
Image Number: 158088
Caption: I heard oil companies just discovered huge reservoirs of oil way under the ground, all around our town. But they can't get at it because President Obama declared the whole region a national monument before he left. Why would he do that? Doesn't he know we use oil to make plastic, and that my Playstation is totally made of plastic? What happens of I ever need to buy a fourth Playstation 4? He's endangering my supply just to save a bunch of trees and mountains and waterfalls and endangered bearicorns. Until recently, people thought the bearicorn was a myth, and ... wait, you have three Playstations?
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-04-01 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-04-01 Pub. Date: 2017-04-01
Image Number: 156208
Caption: You're on the "Ask Sadie" show. What's your problem?! I just found out "Empire" and "Star" are in the same universe. For months I've been telling everyone I knew that "Star" was a blatant ripoff of "Empire." But then I found out they're made by the same people and they're in the same tv universe, and I'm like totally fine with it now. Stop it! We speak "English" on this show, not "tv addict"! Wait a minute ... are we talking about soap operas? Because there's an exception for soap operas. No, we're wait ... yeah, I guess we are.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-03-27 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-03-27 Pub. Date: 2017-03-27
Image Number: 156203
Caption: You're on "Ask Sadie." What's your problem?! Donald Trump. I had a stroke last year, and I'm totally housebound. Meals on Wheels brings me food every day … so I don’t starve. When I voted for Donald Trump, I was under the influence he was going to help us, not take my food. Translation: You thought he'd cut other people's programs, not yours. Maybe you can chew on that for the next four years.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-03-09 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-03-09 Pub. Date: 2017-03-09
Image Number: 155394
Caption: Randy, if you could be any animal there is, which one would you be? Easy: I'd be a Bonobo monkey. But not just any Bonobo monkey, I'd be the king of all Bonobo monkeys. They resolve all their conflicts with a little good, old-fashioned, hot, steamy lovin'. They're the best animal to be. DO you agree? Totally, of course. No conflict here.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-02-21 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-02-21 Pub. Date: 2017-02-21
Image Number: 154814
Caption: I found out something last night that just totally destroyed my entire worldview. The burrito, as most Americans know it, did not actually come from Mexico. Or maybe it did. The internet is of two minds about the issue. The point is, if you can't count on the burrito being Mexican, you can't count on anything. I have something to tell you about Chop Suey.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-26 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-26 Pub. Date: 2016-12-26
Image Number: 152642
Caption: Boss … there was a $25,000 "Christmas bonus" in my check this year. I just want to thank you. I was totally wrong about you, you're a great man. Don't mention it. You've been my trusted right-hand stooge for almost 16 years now. This is my little way of saying ... you are ordered to spend every last cent of it downloading poetry and widget diagrams from Poetry-and-Widgets.com. This wouldn't be some sort of money laundering scheme, would it? Don't be absurd. Money can never be dirty.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-17 totally 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-17 Pub. Date: 2016-12-17
Image Number: 152127
Caption: Are you ever worried people will see all the stuff you put online? Not at all … because I don't put anything online. I'm not on Facebook, I'm not on Twitter, and I conduct all my business in person so they can be charmed by the twinkle in my mustache. You are looking at a man who's totally off the grid, little buddy. It's like talking to a Neanderthal. I also shave with a razor-sharp sliver of granite my grandfather bequeathed unto me.
     
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