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Candorville

Comics about tickets and ticketing.

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Result page:    2  Next  (39 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-07-28 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-07-28 Pub. Date: 2019-07-28
Image Number: 178668
Caption: You got some money I could hold right quick? My boy Tashif Sheefy McFly Turner got arrested in Detroit, bruh. I don't know, Clyde … What'd they arrest this guy for? He was painting a mural the city hired him to paint. Naturally, the cops arrested him for vandalism. A city official came down an' told the cops what was up. So all of a sudden they arrested him for somethin' else: resisting, obstructing ... havin' a outstanding traffic ticket ... Geez ... All right, I just sent you money. I think it's great you want to bail him out. Boop boop. Bail who out? He been got out weeks ago. Thanks for the money, though, Big L. Give me back my money!
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-03-07 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-03-07 Pub. Date: 2019-03-07
Image Number: 176627
Caption: Hello, you've reached the office of New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft. To ask about season tickets, press one. To ask about our support for players kneeling to protest police brutality, press two. To ask about Mr. Kraft and other powerful men getting caught in a raid at a massage parlor of ill repute, press three. You have just ordered seasons tickets. Three! I pressed three!
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-03-24 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-03-24 Pub. Date: 2018-03-24
Image Number: 169631
Caption: So how was your week, Susan? So-so. I brought in a huge client. And then we lost a different one. I met a great guy. And the next morning I met his girlfriend. I found a perfect parking spot. And then I got a parking ticket. I finally had time to read a novel I'd been dying to read. But it turned out to be horrible. Forget I asked. Someone finally asked me how my week went, but ...
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-02-15 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-02-15 Pub. Date: 2018-02-15
Image Number: 168416
Caption: You ready to see Black Panther tonight, Big L? Almost. I got the tickets, I got a baby sitter for Lionel … but I still need to sew my costume. You have any idea how hard it is to find black spandex? What? You're not afraid to be seen with a man wearing spandex tights, are you? Bruh, after what you wore to The Little Mermaid, ain't nothin' faze me.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-01-14 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-01-14 Pub. Date: 2018-01-14
Image Number: 166587
Caption: I was walking along the sidewalk minding my own business … Dr Noodle … when a cop stopped me and ticketed me for walking without a driver's license. Then he took me to jail and held me there for seven hours. May lawyer found out he's done this before, almost always to black pedestrians. I tried really hard to understand why he does that. I thought "maybe he's just incompetent. Maybe he's emasculated at home so he overcompensates at work. Maybe he was trained to do this and so it's not his fault. Maybe the Mandela Effect is real and he came from an alternate universe where walking without a driver's license actually is illegal. People often go to great lengths to avoid noticing this particular elephant in the room. I'm told it's awfully rude to accuse people who do racist things of being racist.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-12-06 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-12-06 Pub. Date: 2017-12-06
Image Number: 165705
Caption: Of course they gon' kill net neutrality, Big L. So what we won't be able to visit any site we want to online anymore. Nothin' good last forever, bruh. It's like that old Doctor Zeus book said … Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened. I don't think Doctor Seuss meant we should apply that to our freedom. Freedom just an illusion, bruh, like parking tickets.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-10-10 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-10-10 Pub. Date: 2017-10-10
Image Number: 163629
Caption: The rest of the president's press pool left Puerto Rico, but I decided to stay and help. They needed people who could drive trucks to help deliver supplies to the survivors. I didn't know you knew how to drive a big rig, Lemont. What's to know? Huh? That reminds me: Did you know a pallet of 10,000 baby wipes makes a good flotation device if you find yourself in the ocean? What? What did you do to their truck?! It's inspiring how fast people, even in the midst of devastation, can all pitch in to buy one man a plane ticket home.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-06-08 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-06-08 Pub. Date: 2017-06-08
Image Number: 158828
Caption: Sir, we're not going to be flying over the North Pole. But isn't that the fastest way to Russia? Yes, but as you may know, the North Pole is a totalitarian dictatorship embroiled in a bloody civil war between state forces and elfin rebels. I don't follow the news. Anyway, my ticket says we transfer to a connecting flight there. Didn't you guys already know about this war? That's not why we're avoiding it. Santa International just melted. @#$% global warming.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-02-23 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-02-23 Pub. Date: 2017-02-23
Image Number: 154804
Caption: So, I won the American Press Foundation's Ambrose Award for Snarky Journalism. That's awesome, Lemont! Does it come with any prize money? Yeah, $2500! But I had to travel cross country to accept it in person. The plane tickets for Lionel and me were $600. The attire was "short-sleeved tuxedo," so I had to have one custom made for over $1000. Well, still ... prestigious. And you scored $900! Lionel's tux was $950.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-09-24 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-09-24 Pub. Date: 2016-09-24
Image Number: 148766
Caption: Hello, creditor, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. Paying 30% interest on the bus ticket you helped me buy 20 years ago is more important to me than survival. So I can't come to the phone right now, because I'm busy bundling all my cash to send to you instead of using it to feed my child, pay my rent and keep my lights on. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you when I'm done making money appear out of thin air. Beep.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-08-02 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-08-02 Pub. Date: 2016-08-02
Image Number: 146689
Caption: What do you mean you "had no choice"? I checked my bank account this morning. Newspapers, coffee, lunch, bus fare, diapers, day care, movie tickets, clothes … It all adds up. It's like every day I leave the building, $50 vanishes from my wallet. Locking yourself on the roof all day is not the answer. I'm cold, hungry and my son's kinda stinky.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-03-14 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-03-14 Pub. Date: 2016-03-14
Image Number: 140509
Caption: I was supposed to be covering a horrible story in Uganda. But then a horrible story broke in the Ukraine. So I changed my ticket to the Ukraine and booked a room at the Motel Sixky. Turns out there is no "Motel Sixky." It was a fake website run by identity thieves. Look on the bright side: Now you got a horrible story to cover right in your house. True.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-02-07 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-02-07 Pub. Date: 2016-02-07
Image Number: 138359
Caption: People who complain about voter ID laws are such liars when they say dirt-poor people can't afford to get ID. How do they get to be drunk all the time? How can they possibly buy their booze if they don't have ID? They hand their money to someone else who does have ID, and say, "Can you buy me a beer?" It happens all the time. And how can they ever cash a check?! They endorse it to someone else, or they go to a check-cashing store. How do they fly on airplanes?! "Dirt-poor people" don't usually buy plane tickets. Well they don't seem to have any trouble showing photo ID to get welfare! A lot of places don't require photo ID to get welfare. You're really not supposed to answer rhetorical questions. Do you know very many "dirt-poor people"?
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-12-10 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-12-10 Pub. Date: 2015-12-10
Image Number: 136222
Caption: I took your advice. I'm going on a double date next week. Susan and her allegedly perfect man vs. me and my lady friend from Vancouver. Yeh this gon' turn out real well. Did you just hear what you said, Big L? That guy can't be perfect. Vancouver is perfect. There can be only one perfect. I'ma sell tickets to this.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-10-27 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-10-27 Pub. Date: 2015-10-27
Image Number: 134383
Caption: I tried to buy tickets to "Star Wars" online as soon as they were available, but they were already sold out. I grew up playing video games. I had the first Atari. The first Playstation. I had the fastest thumb on the block. But if "Star Wars" sold out before I could complete my order and hit "purchase," that means I'm ... I'm ... A geek? It means I'm getting old! My thumb is past its prime.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-10-10 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-10-10 Pub. Date: 2015-10-10
Image Number: 133463
Caption: Susan, when I told you about that sexy woman I met, you seemed really … ticked off. Oh, I was just thinking about something else. I got a parking ticket. Had a bill due. Stubbed my toe. I certainly wasn't frustrated that you keep choosing unattainable women while the perfect woman for you is staring you in the face. Oh, ok. You should really be more careful where you put your toe.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-02-26 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-02-26 Pub. Date: 2015-02-26
Image Number: 123399
Caption: So when do I get a copy of your book? February 45th. That's when I give out free copies of the thing I slaved for over two years to friends who think it's some kind of compliment to not pay me $8.95 for it. … Or tomorrow for friends who I forgot just bought me a $16 movie ticket. Dios Mio. (This cartoon was originally published on 2013-01-24).
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-08-16 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-08-16 Pub. Date: 2014-08-16
Image Number: 114930
Caption: Hello, creditor, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. Paying 30% interest on the bus ticket you helped me buy 20 years ago is more important to me than survival. So I can't come to the phone right now, because I'm busy bundling all my cash to send to you instead of using it to feed my child, pay my rent and keep my lights on. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you when I'm done making money appear out of thin air. BEEP.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-04-16 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-04-16 Pub. Date: 2014-04-16
Image Number: 110108
Caption: Women don’t need to earn the same thing men earn. You know why that be? 'Cause even when they have a job, they make us pay for erething. We gotta pay for dinner, we gotta pay they phone bill, we gotta buy they movie tickets. Maybe they do earn 77 cents less than men, but at least 33 cents of every dollar we earn go to them. You don't have a job, Clyde.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-03-17 ticket 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-03-17 Pub. Date: 2014-03-17
Image Number: 108863
Caption: I was supposed to be covering a horrible story in Uganda. But then a horrible story broke in the Ukraine. So I changed my ticket to the Ukraine and booked a room at the MOTEL SIXKY. Turns out there IS no "Motel Sixky." It was a fake website run by identity thieves. Look on the bright side: now you got a horrible story to cover right in your house. True.
     
Result page:    2  Next  (39 images)