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Rudy Park

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Result page:    2  Next  (23 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-12 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-12 Pub. Date: 2018-06-12
Image Number: 172241
Caption: Meanwhile at a café in neighboring Canardville … Have you gathered all the regulars and local animals two-by-two, minion? You were serious about that, boss? Totally unrelated topic: Let's say thousands of years ago, a big oil company was bribing a local shopkeeper to let them use his basement. Let's call him ... oh, I don't know ... Noah. Let's say big oil was using Noah's Cafe to conduct an illegal fracking operation. Let's say this type of mining is ... a tad risky ... and let's say big oil assured Noah that his cafe would be the one place in town that wouldn't cave in. Very very bad man.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-01-13 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-01-13 Pub. Date: 2018-01-13
Image Number: 167109
Caption: Boss, I have a suggestion for you that win-win. It'll save you thousands of dollars in health insurance premiums. Listening … If you pay to have me cryogenically frozen and then thawed every other day, I'll get to live to be 180, and you'll get an employee who's young and productive for the rest of your life. Ignoring. Don't you want to sleep on it?
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-05 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-05 Pub. Date: 2017-11-05
Image Number: 164017
Caption: What can I get you? The pumpernickel sriracha margarita mocha sounds good. Ok. Can I get you anything else, ma'am? Yes. An explanation of the Fermi paradox. Would you like the most common explanation, or the latest explanation? The latest would be lovely. Despite knowing there are trillions of planets out there, we haven't seen any evidence of alien life because we're part of a simulation. We exist on the computer of someone living in a higher reality. The limits of our knowledge are dictated by the sophistication of the guy's program. He's been steadily upgrading the program. That's why the Hubble telescope "discovered" all those "old" galaxies, and that's why we've "discovered" thousands of new planets. We'll "discover" aliens as soon as the guy running our simulation gets around to installing the "alien life" expansion pack. I meant to ask for that "to go."
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-10-27 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-10-27 Pub. Date: 2017-10-27
Image Number: 164163
Caption: Some people think there's a "second species" living secretly with us who aren't homo sapiens. What are you talking about, little buddy? They say it's a cone-headed species called "homo capensis." They say this secret species controls our banks and religions ... so they can divide and conquer up, so we'll be too busy hating each other to notice them. HOJ. Mankind has been coming up with excuses for its own failings for thousands of years, little buddy. That's probably exactly what the coneheads would want us to do.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-10-17 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-10-17 Pub. Date: 2017-10-17
Image Number: 163916
Caption: I can't believe blade runner 2049 flopped so hard, Randy. I can, little buddy. It was amazing. It was beautifully done. But it was fifteen thousand hours long. At the 2.5 hour mark, your eye starts to wander. You start thinking about other movies. You think maybe you rushed into this one and you're just settling. Are we still talking about movies? You think of sneaking into a different one.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-05-18 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-05-18 Pub. Date: 2017-05-18
Image Number: 158091
Caption: Rudy, you can't meet with the Russians. It'll be a disaster of epic proportions. How so? What could possibly go wrong? There are always unintended consequences with Russia. It was summer of 1988. I was a teenager on a one-man goodwill tour across the Soviet Union. Just me, my Harley and my leather jacket ... that is, until I visited the Kremlin. Let's just say I rode the last few thousand miles of that journey with a beautiful older blonde named Irina clinging to my back. Her father Mikhail was furious. He was so distracted for the next year that his entire country fell apart. Wait ... who was her father? Remind me to show you my Presidential Medal of Freedom.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-04-11 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-04-11 Pub. Date: 2017-04-11
Image Number: 156747
Caption: It turns out celiac disease is thousands of years old. Yet I still never heard about "gluten" till recently. What do you think that means, Randy? It obviously means big wheat has some explaining to do. They must've altered the grains. I don't know. Maybe it's because our environment has gotten cleaner. So since our antibodies haven't had to work as hard, they've gotten weaker. HOJ. If there's one thing you'd know about, little buddy, it's atrophy. We should have our own science show.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-16 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-16 Pub. Date: 2016-12-16
Image Number: 152126
Caption: Boss, the health inspector said you should be ashamed for extorting him. "Ashamed"? Is he serious? Did he also say flocks of mermaids should teleport to Atlantis to picnic with unicorns? Our next president was on trial for bilking thousands of people out of their life savings. "Shame" doesn't exist anymore. Very bad man. Ask him whether unicorns fly or just prance on his planet.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-10-10 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-10-10 Pub. Date: 2016-10-10
Image Number: 149621
Caption: Hi, this is click-whistle-chirp. Hi. … wait, who? Did you know humans are not the only sentient species on earth? Almost every species is sentient, contrary to thousands of years of racist propaganda. They think, they feel pain, they act with intent, they feel emotions ... especially the octopods. Never get on an octopus's bad side. House of Java Cybercafe. They've just never felt the needs to speak human languages before. Before? Before what? ... Wait ... am I talking to a dolphin? The sentient species of the earth would like you to please consider not voting for Donald Trump.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-09-18 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-09-18 Pub. Date: 2016-09-18
Image Number: 147784
Caption: Welcome to the Ask Sadie Radio Advice Hour. You're on Vancouver. It's my boyfriend. He's so distant. No emotionally … Emotionally it's like we're in the very same room, on the very same chair … in the same pair of pants, actually … we're close, is what I'm saying. But he lives so far away. Thousands of miles. And neither one of us can just pick up and move. We both have ties. Responsibilities. There's only one piece of advice I can give you ... Sock puppets. What you do is, you scrawl your lover's likeness onto the sock puppet. Then. whenever you feel heartache, slip it onto your fist ... and pummel yourself in the face for ever starting a stupid long-distance romance in the first place. Um ... thank you?
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-07-31 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-07-31 Pub. Date: 2016-07-31
Image Number: 145649
Caption: Rudy, how's that print order coming? What print order? The "House of Java" flags I asked you to have printed. You were serious? Of course. Britain exiting the European Union was just the first domino to fall. Spain might be next , then Finland, then Foreignvania and all the other Anias. And that's just for starters. It's going to spread. My sources tell me the Maldives will be next to split up. Each coral atoll will become a separate and distinct Maldo. "Maldo"? From there the contagion will spread to Australia, which will become a collection of separate city states, some run by man, some run by marsupials. My calculations show it'll eventually spread to North America, where we'll disintegrate into thousands of tiny fiefdoms ruled by whoever is first to plant a flag. Are you sure you didn't forget to carry the "one"?
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-04-29 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-04-29 Pub. Date: 2016-04-29
Image Number: 142431
Caption: "Ask Sadie Advice Hour," what's your problem?! Being a high school student is literally killing me. I sit all day at school, and I sit all evening doing my homework. Stop yer sniveling!!! Every student since the beginning of time has had to deal with this problem. Yes, you're sitting all day. But like any other teenager, you should be burning thousands of calories anyway. The eye-rolling alone should burn up to 473 calories per hour. Pick up the pace, slacker!!!
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-02-23 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-02-23 Pub. Date: 2016-02-23
Image Number: 139579
Caption: How many people do you think will mourn for you when you're dead, Randy? Good question, little buddy. I live out loud. I've ridden a motorcycle across five continents, making countless friends along the way. I've conducted passionate love affairs in six languages, and taught the ancient art of seduction to sold-out crowds in two hemispheres. As a youth I delivered pizza to lonely housewives, for whom I host an annual reunion in Vegas. A man who lives his life out loud will leave thousands of mourners when he dies. What about a man who lives his life on mute?
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-02-19 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-02-19 Pub. Date: 2016-02-19
Image Number: 139256
Caption: I slipped and fell in your establishment. I'll settle out of court for $50 thousand. Where'd you slip? Right out front. I mean, inside the front entrance. I mean, near the counter. By that, I mean to say over at one of the booths. Say, totally unrelated question ... Which part of the cafe has no security cameras? The restrooms. I slipped and fell in the restrooms. Get out.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-10-17 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-10-17 Pub. Date: 2015-10-17
Image Number: 133875
Caption: Boss, I have a suggestion for you that's win-win. It'll save you thousands of dollars in health insurance premiums. Listening … If you pay to have me cryogenically frozen and then thawed every other day, I'll get to live to be 180, and you'll get an employee who's young and productive for the rest of your life. Ignoring. Don't you want to sleep on it.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-08-21 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-08-21 Pub. Date: 2015-08-21
Image Number: 131354
Caption: A smart reader would get a Kindle and have thousands of books on just one device. A book is a universe. The goal, my dim nemesis, is to lose yourself in that universe. While reading, nothing should exist outside of you and the book. Having several other books just a tap away ruins the intimacy of the reading experience. That's the problem with your generation. As readers, you're all philandering hussies.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-07-12 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-07-12 Pub. Date: 2015-07-12
Image Number: 128758
Caption: My gmail account is full. I can't get any more email. You can't? I'll miss email. It was so old-timey. You could write hundreds or even thousands of words, with actual paragraphs. People didn't see any little animations to show them you were typing. They had to actually wonder if and when you were going to reply. And the spam was fun. You never get to hear from Nigerian princes while you're checking your texts. Just delete stuff. If you delete a few gigs of old emails, you'll be able to get new emails again. I can't do that. Those emails are the chronicle of my life between 2004 and 2015. When future historians want to see what Rudy Park was saying and experiencing in his prime, this archive will be priceless. I must preserve my emails, much as millennia of sediment preserved the dinosaurs. The Rudysaurus Rex was a dimwitted, slow-moving species. Driven extinct by its lack of dating skills.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-06-11 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-06-11 Pub. Date: 2015-06-11
Image Number: 128139
Caption: I've read fifteen books in the last three months, Randy. What? You? Read? Books were invented 5 thousand years ago, little buddy … and I thought if a technology was created prior to the year 2000, you weren't interested. That is my motto. But Amazon's new Kindle Voyage e-reader is cutting-edge tech. HOJ. I don't know, little buddy, it sounds like a dangerous paradox to me. I have been having nightmares about the Ghostbusters crossing the streams.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-05-28 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-05-28 Pub. Date: 2015-05-28
Image Number: 127572
Caption: I can't believe you got one of those ear gouges. "Gauges." They're all the rage. I'm keeping it. Don't judge me just because you're behind the times. People have been doing it all over the world for thousands of years. It's nothing new. It's not? Ogawd! What have I done?!
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-06-25 thousand 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-06-25 Pub. Date: 2014-06-25
Image Number: 112981
Caption: 4,489 American troops lost their lives in Iraq, and thousands were seriously wounded for life. Some accounts say half a million Iraqis died because of the war. But you know what? If it turns out they all sacrificed in vain, then that's the most powerful reminder there is that wars of choice do not end well. ... In which case they did NOT sacrifice in vain. I've forgotten what you just said.
     
Result page:    2  Next  (23 images)