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Candorville

Comics about telephones and telephoning.

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1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-02-03 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-02-03 Pub. Date: 2019-02-03
Image Number: 175839
Caption: I read your article where you bashed people who accuse Star Trek Discovery of being a Social Justice Warrior show. You wrote Star Trek has always been a show about social justice. The entire premise of the show was a ship full of people from all walks of life ... flying from planet to planet to enlighten bigots, fascists and all kinds of other (censored). But you're hopelessly biased. Of course you would want people to have a so-called open mind. Your grandmother was a call-girl. Don't bother denying it, I spent all night on Google figuring it out. She was a telephone operator ... That's what they called telephone operators. Your defensiveness means I'm right. That's science.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-04-24 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-04-24 Pub. Date: 2017-04-24
Image Number: 157284
Caption: Where Susan be at, bruh? Her phone been busy all week. I don't know, Clyde. But why're you trying to call Susan? You don't like talking on the phone. At least, that's what you always tell me when I call you just to chat. That 'cause you make erethang always 'bout you, bruh. So does Susan. Yeah, but Susan more interesting.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-01-25 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-01-25 Pub. Date: 2017-01-25
Image Number: 153703
Caption: 1982. Last night I looked across the alley and saw your light on, but you weren't answering your tin can. I didn't know you called me. Maybe the string wasn't tight enough to receive the call. But I was busy anyway. I was writing to my pen pal. Chuck's been having trouble working up the courage to talk to some little red-haired girl. He was even too timid to try my suggested "pull her hair" ice-breaker. That's my best move. I don't know why you men think us women like that. Try my can again tonight, I'll try to get better reception.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-11-23 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-11-23 Pub. Date: 2016-11-23
Image Number: 151296
Caption: Dick, would you get Lemont Brown on the phone for me? Sorry, it's against my religion. I've converted to being Amish. We're not allowed to use phones, or computers, or copiers … or anything else you might ask me to do. Pretty sure the Amish do use phones, Dick. I'm not sure I'm supposed to be listening to backtalk from the womenfolk.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-10-13 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-10-13 Pub. Date: 2016-10-13
Image Number: 149612
Caption: I kicked myself for not asking Vancouver for her number … but there was still one more day of the convention. So the next morning, I strolled around the hotel, and then around the block, hoping I'd run into her. My Fitbit told me I ended up strolling for eleven miles that morning. There's a thin line between love and stalking. Turns out she'd slept in.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-05-04 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-05-04 Pub. Date: 2016-05-04
Image Number: 142720
Caption: What you called me last night at two a.m. for, Big L? I don't know. I just didn't want to sleep, I guess. Every time I start to drift off, I begin to have this dream I really don't want to have. So I'm just going to stay awake until my subconscious mind gives up and forgets about that dream. I ain't never seen a man play "chicken" with hisself before. I'm going to show me who's boss if it kills me.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-02-18 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-02-18 Pub. Date: 2016-02-18
Image Number: 139237
Caption: Hi, cutie. Hi back, "Vancouver." You recognized my voice! Of course I did. It's the only voice that makes my heart jump straight up into my throat. Aw, you're sweet. I was afraid you'd forgotten my voice, since we usually only text. I'm just calling to let you know about a wonderful new app that can make your voice sound like someone else's ... WHO is this?
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-12-11 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-12-11 Pub. Date: 2014-12-11
Image Number: 119936
Caption: Hi momma, how are you doing? Are you taking your pills? Are you going for walks? Did your acid reflux go away? Are you taking your insulin? Did that rash turn out to be shingles after all? Bowel movements regular again? Mom, you can tell me all this on the phone. So please stop posting about all that stuff on my Facebook wall. Mnphn.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-12-10 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-12-10 Pub. Date: 2014-12-10
Image Number: 119935
Caption: Momma … I remember what you said to granny when I was a kid. You said "I'm working, I have a son to raise, and a life to live … so forgive me if I don't call you as much as you'd like." (Sigh) No, momma, that was not an episode of "Dallas." A-Train.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-11-22 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-11-22 Pub. Date: 2014-11-22
Image Number: 118797
Caption: Hello, wrong number, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. Yes, I am absolutely sure I'm not the person you're trying to call. Feel free to call back a third time just in case I've realized I actually AM the person I'm not. Beep.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-06-08 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-06-08 Pub. Date: 2014-06-08
Image Number: 111681
Caption: Ring! Ring! Ring! You're not gonna answer it? Why would I do that? Ring ring ring ring ring ring. Ring! Ring! Ring! My friends text me. My creditors email me. If anyone calls me at home, odds are it's a telemarketer or a politician. Ring! Ring! Ring! Ring! Ring! So you don't trust anyone who actually wants to talk to you? Right. That's just shady. Click!
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-07-14 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-07-14 Pub. Date: 2012-07-14
Image Number: 51943
Caption: Hello, Mom, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. I can't come to the phone right now because I'm busy interviewing prospective girlfriends to find one you might approve of. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you with a list of the final candidates. BEEP. (this cartoon was originally published in 2010).
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-05-13 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-05-13 Pub. Date: 2012-05-13
Image Number: 79902
Caption: RING! RING! RING! You're not gonna answer it? Why would I do that? RING RING RING RING RING RING RING. My friends text me. My creditors email me. RING! RING! RING! If anyone calls me at home, odds are it's a telemarketer or a politician. RING! RING! R - RING! RING! RING! So you don't trust anyone who actually wants to talk to you. Right. That's just shady. CLICK!
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-01-21 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-01-21 Pub. Date: 2012-01-21
Image Number: 43151
Caption: Dear telemarketer, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. Are you happy with your current chair? Or does sitting in it hour after hour make your lower back sore? Do you feel the pain slowly spreading up your spine and spread out like calloused fingers gripping and squeezing your ribs? Why don't you think about that for a few hours after you hear the beep. Beep. (Originally published on 2010-01-23.)
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-08-22 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-08-22 Pub. Date: 2011-08-22
Image Number: 64816
Caption: The Candorville Chronicle. But that makes no sense, sir! We should do what we're good at! For instance ... surveys show that comics are the main reason a lot of reason people buy the newspaper. We should run more of them, larger, and all together. Websites can't do that, especially on the iPhone or Android. Don't interrupt Brown. But, Mr. W.. It's rude. As I was saying: To compete with the iPhone, we're going to shrink the paper to the size of it.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-08-06 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-08-06 Pub. Date: 2011-08-06
Image Number: 63976
Caption: Dear Momma, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. I can't come to the phone right now because I'm out buying you roses for every little holiday, special occasion, and cold you've ever had in my whole entire life that I neglected to commemorate. Please leave a message, and I'll get back to you as soon as I get over all these bee stings. Beep.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-06-18 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-06-18 Pub. Date: 2011-06-18
Image Number: 62128
Caption: Hello, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. Please leave a message. Hi, Laquisha, this is Tyrone. I'm sick and tired of you always complaining about me … saying I never listen, and that I never pay attention … … or whatever.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-01-30 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-01-30 Pub. Date: 2011-01-30
Image Number: 56625
Caption: Whutsis? This is your wake-up call. No matter what you say or do, they'll call you a socialist who's trying to destroy capitalism. Saywhat now? You could give every CEO a big wet kiss … Wrong number … … And they'd say you're forcing businesses to buy chapstick. Also, your ears aren't getting any smaller. YOU HAVE THE WRONG NUMBER!!!
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-01-14 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-01-14 Pub. Date: 2011-01-14
Image Number: 56141
Caption: Hello baby, it's Momma. My new year's resolution is to stop giving you guilt trips. That's why, instead of waiting in vain for you to call your mother to find out whether she's alive or dead, I'm taking the initiative and calling you. Happy New Year, bab -- (cough cough) ... baby.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-12-24 telephone 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-12-24 Pub. Date: 2010-12-24
Image Number: 55459
Caption: Hello, creditor, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. I can't come to the phone right now because I'm out stimulating the economy by buying gifts I can't afford with money I don't have, after which I'll be unable to pay you back. Merry Christmas, and thank you for helping me do my patriotic duty. Beep.
     
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