1. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2018-04-15 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-04-15 |
Image Number: |
170118 |
Caption: |
See all these millions of people, son? Anything they've earned, you can earn too. Anything they've built, you can build too. Anything they've inherited … anything they've earned, you can earn too. Daddy? Why you always not finishing sentences?
|
|
|
|
|
2. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2018-04-03 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-04-03 |
Image Number: |
170149 |
Caption: |
So how's Lionel? Amazing. Guess what happened last night? We were eating dinner. He was playing with his food, so I asked him if he was done, and I reached for his plate. He said I not done, but you can take it after I done. Amazing means something else once you have kids, I guess. He's using compound sentences three years early!
|
|
|
|
|
3. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2017-11-19 |
Pub. Date: |
2017-11-19 |
Image Number: |
164467 |
Caption: |
Great-looking hair, made easy. Just dye. We now return to our program. How much time do I have to save the kitten, bring Timmy his inhaler, and defuse the nuclear bomb? You have a lot less time than you did before you started that sentence. We'll be back after these messages ... I'm rally psyched Little Tyrant Pizza's bringing the flavor with its new pecan guacamole dipping sauce! A guy, a beach, a skateboard. A girl bouncing in slow motion. And these corn chips that have nothing to do with any of that. Buy them. Six other commercials that go on so long that you don't remember what show you're watching. Going back to Netflixing everything. And now back to our show ... What were we doing? Defusing something or other, I think.
|
|
|
|
|
4. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2017-01-18 |
Pub. Date: |
2017-01-18 |
Image Number: |
153406 |
Caption: |
Vancouver was nervous, just like me. There we stood, two people who'd Facebooked every day for a year … who earn a living telling stories to millions … yet neither of us could string together a complete sentence. She drew me into her home in absolute silence ... Almost. I could hear out soft footsteps on her carpet. I could hear my own heart beating. I could hear my phone ring. I could hear her say "You gonna get that?" I could hear myself say "It's just a telemarketer." Dios mio.
|
|
|
|
|
5. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2016-07-30 |
Pub. Date: |
2016-07-30 |
Image Number: |
146475 |
Caption: |
I'm not the most confident guy. How can I build up my confidence? Simple. Interrupt erebody. C-Dog's Incredibly Bad Advice. When you interrupt people in mid-sentence, it ruin they confidence. Throws them off they game. Then they even less confident than you. So what you're saying it, don't worry about building myself up, just tear the other guy down. That'll be $2. |
|
|
|
|
6. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2016-03-01 |
Pub. Date: |
2016-03-01 |
Image Number: |
139625 |
Caption: |
So how's Lionel? Amazing. Guess what happened last night? We were eating dinner. He was playing with his food, so I asked him if he was done, and I reached for this plate. He said "I not done, but you can take it after I done." "Amazing" means something else once you have kids, I guess. He's using compound sentences three years early! |
|
|
|
|
7. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2015-12-20 |
Pub. Date: |
2015-12-20 |
Image Number: |
136218 |
Caption: |
See all these millions of people, son? Anything they've earned, you can earn too. Anything they've built, you can build too. Anything they've inherited … Anything they've earned you can earn too. Daddy? Why you always not finishing sentences? |
|
|
|
|
8. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2015-12-06 |
Pub. Date: |
2015-12-06 |
Image Number: |
135628 |
Caption: |
How come you never come to my book signings? I ain't have all that free time, Big L. C-Dog busy. Gotta keep it hustlin'. You know how I do. How you do what? What do you mean, "How you do what?" "How I do … " "How we do … " It's an expression, bruh. No it's not. It's just an incomplete sentence. What you're "expressing" is that you can't finish a sentence. I feel like expressions used to be clever. Since when has not finishing a sentence been clever? And you wanna know why I ain't go to your book signings. What a lazy country we've become. |
|
|
|
|
9. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2015-10-11 |
Pub. Date: |
2015-10-11 |
Image Number: |
133081 |
Caption: |
Great looking hair, made easy. Just dye. We now return to our program. How much time do I have to save the kitten, bring Timmy his inhaler, and defuse the nuclear bomb? You have a lot less time than you did before you started that sentence. We'll be back after these messages ... I'm really psyched Little Tyrant Pizza's bringing the flavor with its new pecan guacamole dipping sauce! A guy, a beach, a skateboard. A girl bouncing in slow motion. And these corn chips that have nothing to do with any of that. Buy them. Six other commercials that go on so long that you don't remember what show you're watching. Going back to Netflixing everything. And now back to our show ... What were we doing? Defusing something or other. I think. |
|
|
|
|
10. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2015-08-03 |
Pub. Date: |
2015-08-03 |
Image Number: |
130583 |
Caption: |
I don't understand why Bernie Sanders isn't polling better among minorities, Clyde. He's our best ally in the race. He's fought against mass incarceration and mandatory minimum sentences for decades. He wants undergraduate education to be free to students, like K-12. He's strong on voting rights ... Yeh, but bruh ... the man name is "Bernie." That's like Bert an' Ernie put together. A muppet don't have no business askin' for my vote. I can't believe your vote counts as much as mine. |
|
|
|
|
11. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2015-03-18 |
Pub. Date: |
2015-03-18 |
Image Number: |
124246 |
Caption: |
I just think it would be awfully frustrating to not have a woman president because of some emails. Why? People are derailed over tiny things all the time. 20 years ago, some guy got a life sentence for stealing a slice of pizza. Can't get much tinier than that. And then there's the case of Pee Wee Herman ... Not at all the same thing!!! |
|
|
|
|
12. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2014-12-25 |
Pub. Date: |
2014-12-25 |
Image Number: |
120258 |
Caption: |
I don't see why you need to show your son "The Cosby Show," Lemont. If he did what they say he did, he deserves to be erased from history. Which "he," Susan? When you're discussing two people in one sentence, you have to be specific about which one you're referring to in the following sentence. Don't change the subject. How can I? You haven't specified one. |
|
|
|
|
13. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2014-10-01 |
Pub. Date: |
2014-10-01 |
Image Number: |
117058 |
Caption: |
Why do you always get to sit on that side of the sidewalk crack, Tyrone? Maybe that's the good side. Maybe that's why you're happier and more successful than I am. Maybe if I sat there, my entire life would be different. I have just as much right as you to experience the other side of the crack. You ever think "that's the first time in my life I've heard that sentence"? (This cartoon was originally published on 2012-05-31). |
|
|
|
|
14. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2014-07-19 |
Pub. Date: |
2014-07-19 |
Image Number: |
113737 |
Caption: |
I'm not the most confident guy. How can I build up my confid. Simple. Interrupt erebody. C-Dog's Incredibly bad advice. When you interrupt people in mid-sentence, it ruin they confidence. Throws them off they game. Then THEY even less confident than you. So what you're saying is, don't worry about building myself up, just tear the other guy d. That'll be $2. |
|
|
|
|
15. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2014-01-03 |
Pub. Date: |
2014-01-03 |
Image Number: |
105641 |
Caption: |
I don't want to argue. This isn't arguing. I'm not even yelling. Arguments don’t need yelling. Arguments can be intense discussions filled with obstinate logic and infuriatingly literal reasoning. Arguments do need yelling. Shall we look up "need" in the dictionary? Whatever. You can't win a non-argument with an incomplete sentence. Whatever WHAT? (This cartoon originally published 2011-01-07). |
|
|
|
|
16. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2013-09-26 |
Pub. Date: |
2013-09-26 |
Image Number: |
101945 |
Caption: |
Does your mom ever complain that you don’t call her enough? Thug 4 Life. I always get her voice mail. Maybe she don’t remember it's mine when it come up on her caller ID. She is pretty confused these days. I mean, if you don’t want someone to ask for nothin', why would you start every sentence with "Whachoowant?!"? Good talk, Clyde. |
|
|
|
|
17. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2012-07-28 |
Pub. Date: |
2012-07-28 |
Image Number: |
84532 |
Caption: |
Twitter. Twitter.com/candorville. That time when people decided that posting incomplete sentences made them seem profound. |
|
|
|
|
18. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2012-06-10 |
Pub. Date: |
2012-06-10 |
Image Number: |
81209 |
Caption: |
I said you have a communication problem. I hear that part. Dr. Noodle … Lem. What's a "Lem"? It's me finishing my sentence. You sound just like my wife. She's always whining about me not letting her finish her sentences. Why on earth should I? Why should I be subjected to hearing a bunch of blather if I already get the point? Because cutting someone off before she can fully express herself is disrespectful. You're essentially telling her she's a waste of your time. PhD. Well, what a more respectful way of telling her she's a waste of my time? |
|
|
|
|
19. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2012-05-31 |
Pub. Date: |
2012-05-31 |
Image Number: |
81465 |
Caption: |
Why do you always get to sit on that side of the sidewalk crack, Tyrone? Maybe that's the good side. Maybe that's why you're happier and more successful than I am. Maybe if I sat there, my entire life would be different. I have just as much right as you to experience the other side of the crack. You ever think "that's the first time in my life I've heard that sentence"? |
|
|
|
|
20. |
|
Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2012-05-05 |
Pub. Date: |
2012-05-05 |
Image Number: |
47226 |
Caption: |
First they came for illegal-looking brown people, and I did not speak up because I was not an illegal-looking brown person. … Aren't you gonna continue that? Nah, that's all. (Originally published in 2010) |
|
|
|
|