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Rudy Park

Comics about reports and reporting.

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Result page:    2  Next  (23 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2019-05-25 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2019-05-25 Pub. Date: 2019-05-25
Image Number: 177731
Caption: Thanks for calling, Mistercard. To report a lost or stolen card, press 1. To make an excuse for sending in a late payment, press 2. House of Java .Net Cybercafe. If your dog ate your bill, press 1. If it was lost in the mail, 2. If you were run down by a zamboni, and got beaten by hockey moms, 3. Yep, we've heard 'em all, and we ain't buying 'em. They're good.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2019-03-09 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2019-03-09 Pub. Date: 2019-03-09
Image Number: 176655
Caption: Do you know that 15 percent of Americans have reported interrupting a physically intimate moment to answer a cellphone? Shocking. Do you realize what this means? The implications are horrible. 85 percent of people still have rotten reception. You are my curse.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2019-02-10 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2019-02-10 Pub. Date: 2019-02-10
Image Number: 175961
Caption: Up next, a special report: Insomnia, The Silent Killer. Research shows that 54 percent of American adults suffer a sleeping disorder. Side effects can include lost work productivity, depression, increased heart risk … gum disease, petulance, flatulence, Ebola virus, premature writhing death. So get into bed, close your eyes, drift away, and get some rest. No pressure.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-12-08 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-12-08 Pub. Date: 2018-12-08
Image Number: 175274
Caption: Peace process progress report. There will be no long-term ceasefire, but there will be one, single, holiday hug. Agreed? Mumble mumble. I'll take that as a yes. And remember, you need not think of this as a concession to the other person but merely a statement that you aren't defined by another person, especially one you dislike. OMG. I can't breathe. I and my iPhone are so ashamed. Happy Holidays.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-12-06 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-12-06 Pub. Date: 2018-12-06
Image Number: 175272
Caption: Peace process progress report. Here's what we've agreed upon so far … nothing. I don't agree! I will not capitulate to that nonsense. Listen: I'm saying you haven't agreed to anything yet. Sounds reasonable but I'm still opposed. At the risk of agreeing with someone who is always 100 percent wrong, I concur.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-07-29 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-07-29 Pub. Date: 2018-07-29
Image Number: 172980
Caption: This just in: There's nothing in. We here at CNM have finally realized why our ratings have been plummeting. For years, we billed ourselves as a 24-hour news channel. We gave unbiased reports on the major events of the day. But it turns out: There aren't that many major events. How many minor updates can we give you on a fire that takes place at a polygamist compound, or a northeast snowstorm or a traffic snarl? We can admit this because no one is listening. The 24-hour news channels have grown desperate and giddy. We're going to one hour of news, and 23 hours of political bickering and nude juggling.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-15 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-15 Pub. Date: 2018-06-15
Image Number: 172244
Caption: I got a tip about a huge geological calamity that's about to happen across the bridge. This story could make my site famous. Could you watch my boy while I go cover it? 'Course, bruh. For $4,000. Cool … what? I been reading Trump's Art of the Deal. It say if a brotha want something bad enough, charge him fifty times your usual fee. Are you sure that's in there? I demand to know what page. Ok. How much that information worth to you?
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-26 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-26 Pub. Date: 2018-04-26
Image Number: 170878
Caption: What do you mean you want me to vote illegally this November? I'm registered. Yes … but Ernesto isn't. Ernesto Mumumba Chang Yurchenkovitz is an illegal immigrant who tunneled his way across the Atlantic to vote for tax-raising liberal café regulators. Report to the alley at two a.m. Someone who's definitely not me will leave you a big fake mustache, a Yo Soy Ernesto t-shirt, and an ISIS membership card. When you're caught voting, public sentiment will swing our way. You have some never asking me to do this after refusing to let me take a potty break. Stop whining. My inside man at ICE will make sure you're probably not deported.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-02-15 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-02-15 Pub. Date: 2018-02-15
Image Number: 168444
Caption: We interrupt today's "The Price is Right" episode to bring you breaking news … Actor Richard Dreyfuss has been accused of groping the nethers of two female fans, and there are embarrassing photos to prove it. The breaking news is, we're going to stop reporting these things as breaking news, since they've become so common. Breaking news!!!!! It was just a matter of time. Breaking news: The following powerful men have not been accused of sexual assault today ...
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-10-02 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-10-02 Pub. Date: 2017-10-02
Image Number: 163382
Caption: Breaking news! But first, parents may wish to have their children leave the room. Children all gone? Ok, here's the breaking news … This just in: I have to advice parents to have their kids leave the room before I can report on what the president said. Breaking news!!!!! Someone's have a breakdown. That's not normal, people!!!
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-13 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-13 Pub. Date: 2017-08-13
Image Number: 160983
Caption: What was it you wanted to talk about, minion? There's a guy from Immigration and Customs Enforcement out front, boss. Oh, that. ICE said someone would stop by to thank me for tipping them off to all the illegals who were hanging out at Muhammad's Bean Pie Shack. What? Why would you do that? Because I'm a patriot. In times like this, every patriot must do his duty. If we have good reason to suspect a bean pie shack is a gathering place for people who shouldn't be here, it's our solemn duty to report it, so it'll get shut down. This wouldn't happen to have anything to do with how you've been looking for ways to boost our bean pie sales, would it? Coincidence. Don't be a conspiracy theorist, minion. Oh, and go tell ICE I have another tip for them. Very bad man.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-18 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-18 Pub. Date: 2016-12-18
Image Number: 151672
Caption: I suppose you're wondering why I've called you in to the café at 3am, minion. Too tired to wonder, boss. It's come to my attention that you're underreporting your cash tips by a whopping average of 0.003%. And that's impacting me. The whole reason I'm allowed to pay you less than minimum wage ... is because tips are supposed to make up the difference. When tips fall short, I'm supposed to raise your pay. I think we can both agree that that's an absolutely unthinkable horror of biblical proportions. But I've come up with a plan that I think you'll agree is a win-win solution. You'll give me all your tips, and I'll keep you on as an unpaid intern and consider not turning you in. "Win-win" isn't supposed to mean you win twice!
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-11-22 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-11-22 Pub. Date: 2016-11-22
Image Number: 151307
Caption: Did you see Doctor Strange, little buddy? Yes sir!!! I reported to the nearest 3-D theater as mandated by the unspoken Comic Fan Compact of 2008 … wherein we all tacitly agreed that these are not individual movies, they are one big story and to miss even one part of it is sacrilege. I even watch all the Marvel Netflix shows, pursuant to the Daredevil Addendum of 2015, sir!!! So noted.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-10-16 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-10-16 Pub. Date: 2016-10-16
Image Number: 149159
Caption: I'm doing well in my latest Surveymonkey poll. I run polls on all my social media accounts every time I make an important decision. Like when I decide which socks to wear … which movie to stream … which cereal to eat … Today I chose "Lucky Charms." A solid choice. 49% of my followers felt that was proof of sound breakfast judgment. Wait ... doesn't that mean 51% thought it wasn't? Taking a poll is science. Reporting the results is an art. A whopping 32% felt that my sticking with an un-PC breakfast choice showed I was bold enough to be president. You just ate what everyone wished they could eat.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-06-26 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-06-26 Pub. Date: 2016-06-26
Image Number: 144348
Caption: Hello, you've reached Gavrilo O'Leary. If you're calling because you're the aliens in the UFO I saw through my telescope this morning … and you'd like to share the secrets of the universe with me, press one. If, on the other hand, you're calling to see if I'm home ... and if you're going to abduct me, probe my nether regions, implant a tracking device in my spleen and then wipe my memory so I can't report any of it ... press two. Boop. Oh, hello. Thank you for pressing "one." This is Gav. I'm ready to be enlightened. Oops. I meant to press "two." My bad. I see a blindingly bright light coming in through my window and my whole house is shaking. Maybe you guys could try just Facebooking me the info instead?
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-11-19 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-11-19 Pub. Date: 2015-11-19
Image Number: 135391
Caption: This just in: A deadly new disease called "turkey leprosy" is threatening to ruin this year's holiday season. Symptoms include numbness in the feet, muscle weakness after working out, and potentially disfiguring dandruff. Sadie M. Cohen, the worlds foremost expert on turkey leprosy, issues the following statement from her front lawn. "You are all ignoramuses. There will be no further comment." What did she mean by that, Harvey? Good question. Let's discuss that for a few days.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-08-20 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-08-20 Pub. Date: 2015-08-20
Image Number: 131353
Caption: Do you believe in the multiverse, Randy? Of course, little buddy. I am the ultimate specimen of manhood. The paragon of masculinity. Something like that can't be created on the first attempt. Therefore there must be an infinite number of less ideal Randies out there in parallel universes, who can't get dates. You've put a lot of thought into this. I've submitted Randy's cosmological theorem to all the academic journals.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-07-23 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-07-23 Pub. Date: 2015-07-23
Image Number: 130028
Caption: Rudy, I'm thinking of replacing you with Gunther the illegal immigrant. What?! Businessman of the Year. Armstrong Maynard. Relax. I haven't yet made up my mind. I'll give you a chance to underbid him. Gunther says he'll work for $1 a day, from 3am to 11pm. Can you beat that? Yeah. I can turn you in. Tsk tsk ... Gunther would never say something like that.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-07-19 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-07-19 Pub. Date: 2015-07-19
Image Number: 129104
Caption: Breaking news! The Hubble telescope has just detected a rogue planet the size of Venus, plummeting through the asteroid belt. Its gravity is pulling Ceres and several dozen mountain-sized asteroids along with it. NASA believes their combined gravity will be enough to pull Mars and the moon along with them as they scream past earth and plummet into the sun. There will only be one place on earth that won't be utterly devastated by gravimetric forces. Find out where that is later in this broadcast. But first stay tuned for sports, after these messages ... OH COME ON!!! Tired of outrageous cable bills? Switch to satellite (until they all get knocked out of orbit)!
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-03-18 report 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-03-18 Pub. Date: 2015-03-18
Image Number: 124316
Caption: Please help, I'm in turmoil. What is it, my son? Apple and Google are competing vigorously. Yes, the war of the patron saints. As it was foretold. What? You knew this was going to happen?! I read analyst reports. I'm not a dolt. Computer Villa.
     
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