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Candorville

Comics about things that are presidential .

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241. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-03-06 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-03-06 Pub. Date: 2008-03-06
Image Number: 22135
Caption: I have to tell you, Lemont, I’m offended. Zzz… Why didn't you just ask me why the Secret Service didn't check the whole crowd for weapons at an Obama rally in Dallas? I thought we were close. Click. Wha-- who's there? What're you doing here? Federal Agent Murph, and that's classified. I so can't wait until 2009.
     
242. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-03-05 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-03-05 Pub. Date: 2008-03-05
Image Number: 22134
Caption: Lemont Interviews the Secret Service. So, checking only a fraction of the crowd at an Obama rally for weapons was standard procedure? Yeah. Look, it just isn't feasible to check 17,000 people for weapons. Don't schools check millions of kids for weapons every day? Exactly my point. The schools are hogging all the metal detectors.
     
243. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-03-04 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-03-04 Pub. Date: 2008-03-04
Image Number: 22133
Caption: Mr. Wahl, why did the Secret Service order Dallas Police to stop checking for weapons at a Barack Obama rally? We have a layered security plan. We check some people, then we move on to others. Like what? Can't tell you. Top secret. Is one of those layers called "Making up excuses for not checking everyone for weapons"? Who told you?
     
244. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-03-03 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-03-03 Pub. Date: 2008-03-03
Image Number: 22132
Caption: Secret Service. Hi, I'm Lemont Brown, with the Candorville Chronicle. Why did you order Dallas Police to stop checking the crowd for weapons at a Barack Obama rally? I'll transfer you tor Mr. Wahl, our spokesman. (Cli- click) Brick Wahl, here. Oh, you've gotta be kidding me.
     
245. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-02-09 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-02-09 Pub. Date: 2008-02-09
Image Number: 21720
Caption: In other news, Candorville's city auditor has refused to challenge last week's Liebold electronic voting machine results… …which handed victories to Clinton and Huckabee a full week before anyone even voted. "Elections are more a formality anyway," said the secretary. Wolf, how did we get to the point whe-- hold on, this just in, Day 57 and still no news about Paris Hilton doing anything dumb. Britney Spears has no comment.
     
246. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-02-04 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-02-04 Pub. Date: 2008-02-04
Image Number: 21590
Caption: What's wrong, Lemont? Hillary Clinton showed up for a rally today. So? So, she's still trying to mend fences with Blacks after some odd statements and her husband's weird tirades against Obama. Oh, no. Oh, yes. This rib reminds me how much I value Martin Luther King, Jr. WE FORGIVE YOU ALREADY.
     
247. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-02-03 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-02-03 Pub. Date: 2008-02-03
Image Number: 21418
Caption: 1994. Polls show most state voters are pro-choice. Romney for Senate. I will protect a woman's right to choose… 2007. Polls show most primary voters are pro-life. Romney for President. …to have the baby. 1994. Voters increasingly support gays. Romney for Senate. Strong is my support for gays in the military... 2007. Polls show voters oppose gays in the military. Romney for President. ...to keep their mouths shut. 1994. Polls show voters favor gun control. Romney for Senate. I strongly support gun control. 2007. Voters oppose gun control. Romney for President. ...because without control, you can't hit that varmint you're aimin' at. Bless you, poll fairy. Polls show voters hate polls. Bless you to hell, foul creature.
     
248. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-02-02 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-02-02 Pub. Date: 2008-02-02
Image Number: 21417
Caption: In other news, after coming in 15th in the Candorville primary… …the Giuliani Campaign has boldly changed its strategy. They've buried a time capsule with a note, asking patriots in the year 9008 to go back in time and tell them to actually campaign in the early states. When asked whether this is a mark of desperation, the campaign replied... "You have reached a number that has been disconnected for lack of payment." Wolf, that could mean a few things...
     
249. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-02-01 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-02-01 Pub. Date: 2008-02-01
Image Number: 21416
Caption: This just in: Dennis Kucinich is challenging Hillary Clinton's and Mike Huckabee's victories in the Candorville primary. Kucinich says the results from Liebold's electronic voting machines cannot be trusted. Liebold argues that huge discrepancies between today's vote and earlier polls are meaningless. Kucinich disagrees, saying quote: "The election isn't until next week."
     
250. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-01-31 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-01-31 Pub. Date: 2008-01-31
Image Number: 21415
Caption: Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee stunned a group of Candorville voters today… …when he turned water into wine and then ascended into the air in a halo of light. To discuss whether this violates the separation of church and state, our senior analyst, John Johnson. John? Wolf, if it turns out he used some sort of wires, there may be a case.
     
251. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-01-30 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-01-30 Pub. Date: 2008-01-30
Image Number: 21414
Caption: Some experts are wondering if the Clinton campaign is trying to use racially charged code words against Barack Obama. Could saying a vote for Obama is "rolling the dice" and saying "you can't shuck and jive at a news conference" be racial? NURSE! MORPHINE! In other news, experts are wondering if snow is cold.
     
252. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-01-25 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-01-25 Pub. Date: 2008-01-25
Image Number: 21358
Caption: What d'you mean, "a dilemma"? On the one hand, I'm a professional journalist. …Whose job is to comment skeptically about the issues of our time. On the other hand… Every time I try to write critically about Barack Obama, I feel like the eyes of 50 million dead slaves are watching me. Ok, I guess that would be a dilemma. ...So I just write about Britney Spears.
     
253. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-01-19 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-01-19 Pub. Date: 2008-01-19
Image Number: 21205
Caption: I figured out what Obama needs to do if he wins the nomination. If he wins, you just know thousands of bigots are going bullet shopping. So he's gotta pick a vice president that bigots'll hate worse… Someone the bigots wouldn't want to risk becoming president. Obviously, his running mate should be an illegal immigrant.
     
254. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-01-18 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-01-18 Pub. Date: 2008-01-18
Image Number: 21207
Caption: You look happy. Good day fo' a thug rapper, Big L. But I thought you were depressed. I thought white folks in Iowa voting for Obama filled you with hope. I thought that hope made it impossible for you to go on profiting from black misery and despair. Yeh, but then I remembered black-on-black crime. That ALWAYS gon' be there.
     
255. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-01-17 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-01-17 Pub. Date: 2008-01-17
Image Number: 21204
Caption: Clyde, get over it. So a very white state voted for Obama. There's still plenty of misery and hopelessness for the thuggish rapper to exploit. And besides, Jesse Jackson won a bunch of primaries in '88, and white folks still didn't put him on the ticket. You jus' sayin' that to make me feel better. No, it's true!
     
256. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-01-16 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-01-16 Pub. Date: 2008-01-16
Image Number: 21203
Caption: How long have you had this feeling of hope, Mr. Dogg? Couple weeks. Since right 'round the time that state tha's almost 100% white voted fo' a black man fuh president. It affectin' my work, Doc. I ain't wrote nut'n but positivity eva since. Many gangsta rappers beset by hope go on to live long and productive lives. Whimper.
     
257. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-11-25 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-11-25 Pub. Date: 2007-11-25
Image Number: 19614
Caption: Reagan! Bush. Dole. Bush. Bush '04. Romney. Carter! Mondale. Dukakis. Gore. Sharpton. Obama. I wonder what they talk about at dinner.
     
258. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-11-23 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-11-23 Pub. Date: 2007-11-23
Image Number: 19612
Caption: Celebrity Big Brother. So I told Kucinich he should participate more in like, kitchen chores and stuff. An' he told me he'd rather, like, end the war and stuff. An' I'm like, what-ever. I think he likes me, though. I can't wait 'til the writers' strike is over. So I'm like, WHAT war, an' he's like...
     
259. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-11-22 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-11-22 Pub. Date: 2007-11-22
Image Number: 19611
Caption: This just in: neither side is budging in the political speechwriters strike… …so the presidential campaigns have been canceled for the rest of the season. Nobody's quite sure how the country will fill the void. In other news, Dennis Kucinich has joined the cast of "Celebrity Big Brother."
     
260. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-11-21 presidential 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-11-21 Pub. Date: 2007-11-21
Image Number: 19610
Caption: The political speechwriter strike is having a devastating effect on the Clinton campaign. I'm a woman, yet not a woman. I mean, I'm a woman winning, not a winning woman. Er… The strike may have also affected the Giuliani campaign. At a bagel shop this morning, Giuliani said "9/11 really 9/11'd my way of 9/11-ing. Or something. ...9/11."
     
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