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Candorville

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Result page:    2  3  Next  (57 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-05-11 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-05-11 Pub. Date: 2019-05-11
Image Number: 177533
Caption: You wanna come to my boy's soccer game, Clyde? Depends, bruh. When them little kids kick him the ball, do he still wander off, sit down, an' pick dandelions? That was last month. He's gotten a lot better since then. When the coach tell him to play goalie, an' the kids be runnin' at 'im ... Do he still wet hisself? That was just a phase. Too bad. That !@#$ was entertaining.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-05-23 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-05-23 Pub. Date: 2018-05-23
Image Number: 171760
Caption: You want to sleep, son. You know why? Because your dreams are waiting for you. As soon as you sleep, you'll be running through a big, wide field of grass, playing tag with Kermit the Frog. Then you'll be soaring up in the clouds with the birdies and with a flying unicorn. Then you'll be driving a big red fire truck on the rings of Saturn. You dreams are the only place you can do these things without the authorities taking you away. Zzzz ...
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-05-15 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-05-15 Pub. Date: 2018-05-15
Image Number: 171502
Caption: So … Clyde and I were playing basketball when all of a sudden four other guys showed up and asked if they could join in. So we started choosing up teams, and all of a sudden I got all nervous and anxious. I'm a grown man. I have a son. A career. But all of a sudden I was right back in second grade hoping I wouldn't be the last to be picked. Is that why Clyde asked me how my emergency vasectomy went? I had to think of some reason to get out of there.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-05-14 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-05-14 Pub. Date: 2018-05-14
Image Number: 171501
Caption: Wanna play 21? Yeh, bruh. Why don't you get started? I'ma go watch a movie. You text me when you get up to 20 points, then I'll come in. No, thanks. I don’t need your ridiculous head start. I'm offended you even offered. I'll text you when I get to 19. Maybe I'll watch a double feature.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-04-20 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-04-20 Pub. Date: 2018-04-20
Image Number: 170578
Caption: I wish I could go back in time and tell myself it's not too late. When I was nine, momma asked me if I wanted guitar lessons. But I told her no, because I thought I was too old. Clyde had been playing guitar since he was three. At nine, I thought I had already missed my chance. If I'd started learning when I was nine, I'd have been playing for decades now. I'd be a master at it by now. Well why don't you take some lessons now? Are you kidding? At my age?
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-04-03 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-04-03 Pub. Date: 2018-04-03
Image Number: 170149
Caption: So how's Lionel? Amazing. Guess what happened last night? We were eating dinner. He was playing with his food, so I asked him if he was done, and I reached for his plate. He said I not done, but you can take it after I done. Amazing means something else once you have kids, I guess. He's using compound sentences three years early!
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-03-18 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-03-18 Pub. Date: 2018-03-18
Image Number: 168967
Caption: Every time there's a huge massacre, the anti-massacre snowflakes try to take away my arsenal. Don't they know what country they're in? This country was founded on guns. The laws that forbid the carrying of arms … disarm only those who are neither inclined nor determined to commit crimes ... Such laws make things worse for the assaulted and better for the assailants ... for an unarmed man may be attacked with greater confidence than an armed man. - Thomas Jefferson. Thomas Jefferson never said that. And even if he had, you'd be resting your argument on the opinion of a slave owner. There they go playing the slavery card again. Well, you have to admit, if a guy thinks it's ok to treat people like property, that guy's judgment is suspect. That part of his judgment only applied to back then. The gun part applies to right now and forever ... because reasons. You know what he thought it was ok to do with his slaves?
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-02-10 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-02-10 Pub. Date: 2018-02-10
Image Number: 168185
Caption: Can Lionel come to my house and play? No. Why not, Lemont? First of all, it's Mister Brown to you. Second of all, it's 'cause last time he did, he came home calling me Lemont. What have your parents taught you about respecting your elders, Malcolm? That's Mister Malcolm to you, Lemont.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-01-27 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-01-27 Pub. Date: 2018-01-27
Image Number: 167655
Caption: Hi momma, how are you doing? It's Lemont. Your son. What do you mean it can't be. It is. What do you mean the real Lemont is busy sending me videos of my grandson like he promised. I did send you videos. What do you mean they don't work? Did you press play? What do you mean ... (sigh) Did you press the triangle? (Sigh) No, momma, I can't just send a VHS.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-11-09 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-11-09 Pub. Date: 2017-11-09
Image Number: 164652
Caption: 1982. Do you think there's still gonna be mean people in the 21st century, Lemont? Nah. People are getting nicer all the time. Momma and I watched "Roots" back when I was just a little kid. It was about the olden days. A lot of people in those times were clearly very, very mean. But just the other day, I was playing in the park with my Fonzie action figure when some strange man told me "go back where you came from." How was that nice? Well, I went home, and there was a brand new cake there. I don't know how that man knew, but I wish I could thank him.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-07-26 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-07-26 Pub. Date: 2017-07-26
Image Number: 160759
Caption: Wait … did you say someone is bullying my song? Yeh, but I took care of that while you was gone. I taught little bruh to man up an' overcome it exactly the way you did back when we was kids an' a bully was clownin' you. You taught him to stand toe-to-toe with the bully, look him in the eye, and deliver a stirring speech that won his respect? What? That ain't even close to what happened. Well that's how I remember it. You also 'member Sinbad playing a genie ins some '90s movie, but that ain't never happened neither. Yes it did!!!
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-07-06 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-07-06 Pub. Date: 2017-07-06
Image Number: 159982
Caption: Meanwhile, in Candorville … Susan … I know you've always been allergic to commitment. I know you've bailed on every serious relationship you've ever had … Have not. At four, after a week of playing house with Wilfred, you pretended he didn't even exits. At fourteen, after you and your lifelong friend "Turbo" started dating, you faked amnesia. I don't remember that. I never would've told you about my past if I'd known you were gonna throw it in my face. Come on out. I promise this is nothing commitmenty.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-06-06 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-06-06 Pub. Date: 2017-06-06
Image Number: 158826
Caption: To: Rudy Park. From: Lemont Brown. What're you up to these days, Brother Park? That depends. If we're talking the SimCity game I began back when we were in college in '93 … I'm up to 14 linked quad-core RAID devices that take up the whole basement. That's not what I meant. It's costing me a fortune, but I've been playing the same game for so long that I'm pretty sure my 59 billion Sims have become sentient and worship me as a deity. I meant how do you spend your time these days? Working. I've got 59 billion mouths to feed. Tap tap tap tap.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-05-12 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-05-12 Pub. Date: 2017-05-12
Image Number: 157811
Caption: Remember how when we were kids, we'd be out playing for hours, by ourselves? Remember that construction site across the street? I used to hide behind the mounds of dirt and pretend I was Luke Skywalker hiding from sandpeople. I used to climb on the bulldozer and pretend it was an Imperial Walker. I still think you should let your little boy have a little more freedom. And let him get crushed by bulldozers? Are you insane?
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-05-04 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-05-04 Pub. Date: 2017-05-04
Image Number: 157548
Caption: I think you're just jealous, Clyde. Of what? Of me. Because I have a child. A little guy who looks up to me and loves me to death. A little guy I get to teach, and care for, and laugh and play with, and read stories to. A little guy I get to lead on a journey. Deep down, you wish you had what I have, Clyde. Admit it. I'll say it once mo' again: I ain't babysittin' for you tonight.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-01-29 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-01-29 Pub. Date: 2017-01-29
Image Number: 153149
Caption: It all started back in college when I bought a copy of "Mimic City." It was cheap: About 20 simoleons. Dr. Noodle. I played it night and day. When "Mimic City 2" came out, I rushed out to buy it. And every few years a newer, better one would come out. Every iteration was more advanced than the last. The little mimics who populated Mimic City came to seem more and more real. They had jobs, and love lives, and had mimic kids, and grew old. Eventually, I started to wonder: If my mimics behave as if they're real ... what if they actually believe they're real? Would that make me their God? And, if they think they're real ... what if I only THINK I'm real? What if I and everyone else in Simkind are actually living in some game called "Sim City"? Not to self: Stop self-medicating, and just to be sure, delete games from phone. Thank you, Almighty Noodle, for listening to my prayers. Amen.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-01-11 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-01-11 Pub. Date: 2017-01-11
Image Number: 153088
Caption: What's wrong, Lemont? I was playing "Simcity" the other day when it occurred to me … We may all be just a computer simulation. There's evidence of that everywhere. All computer programs have glitches, for instance. We see those glitches all the time. We call them "deja vu." I'm pretty sure we've had this conversation before. I knew you were going to say that.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-11-11 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-11-11 Pub. Date: 2016-11-11
Image Number: 150716
Caption: 1982. How come you never play Dracula tag with us at school? It's exciting! You start out with one person being "it," then whoever he tags is "it" also. And whoever they tag next is also "it," and so on. Before long, you have a whole yard of dozens of bloodthirsty vampires chasing the one lone survivor. That's scary! Momma says it prepares girls for dating. Don't look at me, I almost never understand what momma says, either.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-10-22 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-10-22 Pub. Date: 2016-10-22
Image Number: 149909
Caption: I don't care what the evidence says, the "Central Park Five" were guilty of assaulting that woman! I said it before and I'll say it again: what were they doing there in the first place, playing checkers? Trump. Seriously, Mr. Trump? Why would black and brown kids be in a park? SERIOUSLY? EXACTLY! You see my point. Very suspicious.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-08-11 playing 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-08-11 Pub. Date: 2016-08-11
Image Number: 147068
Caption: Hello, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. I can't come to the phone right now because my son and I are busy building a fort out of sofa cushions. Please leave a message and I'll call you back when I'm a grown-up again. Beep.
     
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