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Candorville

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Result page:     (14 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-11-27 physical 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-11-27 Pub. Date: 2018-11-27
Image Number: 175155
Caption: Think about it: In the year 2050, we'll be able to 3-D print replacement organs. In 2050, we'll be able to reverse the aging of our cells. In 2050, we'll be able to transfer our minds to the cloud, live forever in a virtual world, or inhabit androids to live forever in the physical world. After the year 2050, no one in our generation might ever have to die. I like it when you're optimistic, Lemont. With my luck, I'll get hit by a bus in 2049.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-08-22 physical 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-08-22 Pub. Date: 2013-08-22
Image Number: 100554
Caption: Lemont … Have I told you how much I appreciate having you as a friend? Thank you! I mean, SOME guys try to be all "alpha-male" all the time. Like this guy I'm seeing. Last night, the dude was FLEXING his massive biceps while he was hugging me. That was a real turn off. I like that I've known you all my life, and I still have no idea if you have any muscles. Thank you.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-08-17 physical 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-08-17 Pub. Date: 2012-08-17
Image Number: 86021
Caption: You can't decide you're recovered, Lemont. Yes I can. Dr. Noodle. Psychological wounds are every bit as real as physical ones. What if you had a tumor? What do you mean? Would you tell your surgeon "no need to cut it out. I'll remove it myself with a spork"? Best. Utensil. Ever. Same time next week?
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-01-30 physical 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-01-30 Pub. Date: 2012-01-30
Image Number: 75824
Caption: Of course we can place you. There are all sorts of jobs out here for people who're actually willing to work. Jobville Employment Agency. Do you have experience as a nurse, or a physical therapist? No. How about as a computer software engineer? No. How 'bout as a selling-the-oranges-by-the-freeway-offramp engineer? I don't like where this is going.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-06-09 physical 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-06-09 Pub. Date: 2011-06-09
Image Number: 61780
Caption: Facebook Messages. From Sasha Mitchell. I don't know about being Facebook friends, Lemont. If you think I look older and fatter than when you knew me in college, I'll just die. Don't be silly. We all age. The body's just a shell. It's your SOUL I remember, Sasha, and that never ages. I hadn't thought of it like that. ... OK, I just sent you a friend request. Um ... Are you going to accept it? As soon as I delete every photo of me I can find.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-06-19 physical 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-06-19 Pub. Date: 2010-06-19
Image Number: 48470
Caption: How can something weighing millions of billions of tons fly through the air? I mean, you don't find that in nature. Look at fat birds, for instance … Your fat birds - chickens, turkeys, ostriches - they're not flying all around up in the sky. I'M TRYING TO SLEEP! Well you won't get much sleep if you're yelling. Anyway, you notice all the birds up in the air are anorexic. Take your average buzzard ...
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-01-28 physical 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-03-08 Pub. Date: 2008-01-28
Image Number: 21412
Caption: SQWAWK! BIG L! This big #@$% sho' look dumb widdat bird on he shoulder. Sqwawk!
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-01-18 physical 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-01-18 Pub. Date: 2010-01-18
Image Number: 43146
Caption: Where is he, Doctor? Can I see him? Yes, but you must brace yourself. Lemont Brown is no longer the man you knew. When paramedics brought him in, he'd been beaten so badly he looked NOTHING like his I.D. … Almost as if a big muscle-man had repeatedly sat on his head. Dear God! His nose! His chin! I can hardly bear to look! He looks ... so ... shifty and untrustworthy now! He's going to need your support.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-08-25 physical 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-08-25 Pub. Date: 2009-08-25
Image Number: 37756
Caption: Wait … Dick Fink … Isn't he that guy you used to say was ugly? You used to say he was fat, had huge ears, and no chin? The guy who you've told me has a habit of seducing married women? Dick Fink the homewrecker? The egotist?! The player?! THAT is the guy you've the HOTS for? Susan! I thought you were smarter than that! Chins are overrated. I CAN'T TAKE IT!!!
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-04-22 physical 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-04-22 Pub. Date: 2009-04-22
Image Number: 31769
Caption: Anyway, I should go, Susan. I'm talking with a lawyer. I'm suing Roxanne for custody of Lionel. Yeah, really … The lawyer? An ad on Gregs-List.org. …Well he looks legit enough. He's got degrees, a leather chair, glasses… …And it doesn't seem to faze him when people talk about him like he's not even there. That's a sign of character. Y'know, you say "dios mio" A LOT. Zzzzz.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-01-28 physical 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-01-28 Pub. Date: 2009-01-28
Image Number: 29702
Caption: Once we're married, I want to redecorate. Fine with me. Maybe get rid of the junk in back. Good. Good. Maybe grow a goatee, and some sideburns… … You're not redecorating me! Of course the friends will have to go.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-08-23 physical 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-08-23 Pub. Date: 2008-08-23
Image Number: 26018
Caption: You look like that guy who's running for president. Hold on, short-round. Black people don't all look alike. That's a racist stereotype. You're old enough to learn how to tell black people apart. I, for instance, look NOTHING like Barack Obama. I meant McCain. You're both really old. I liked you better when you were racist.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-08-17 physical 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-08-17 Pub. Date: 2008-08-17
Image Number: 25790
Caption: I turned 30 the other day. That morning, I looked in the mirror and all of a sudden there was a bald spot. I looked some more, and all of a sudden there were lines on my forehead and at the corners of my eyes. I looked in the mirror again that night and I saw turkey neck. And jowls. Definitely jowls. Out of nowhere. And I looked closer, and my skin wasn't smooth anymore. That's when I realized... I see. You realized you've been in denial about growing older. I realized I need a new mirror.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-04-07 physical 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-04-07 Pub. Date: 2008-04-07
Image Number: 22784
Caption: Mumblello? You're butt's gotten huge. Wha- who is th-. You'll never grow taller. You're getting older. You've lived 1/3 of your life and haven't accomplished much. @#$% wake-up calls. You'll never look any better than you do right now.
     
Result page:     (14 images)