I don't want to choose between the lesser of two evils, Randy. Me neither, little buddy. That's why I'm not voting for either Clinton or Trump. I'm going to vote for the only American who has yet to disappoint me. I'm voting for Pocahontas. Just don't tell me anything about her that'll make me think she's a bad choice too. Did you know "Pocahontas" was a nickname that meant "spoiled child"? I'm voting for Paul Bunyan.
Hi, this is John Kasich. Oh. I'm Mortimer Park. I'm calling to remind you I'm still running for "Just-In-Case." "Just-In-Case"? Yes. If Trump doesn't get enough delegates to win on the first ballot, the GOP can choose whomever it wants for president. It could choose Mitt Romney. It could choose Paul Ryan. It could even choose Kim Kardashian. House of Java Cybercafe. You are running for "Just-In-Case." Also, it says here you've got a bum ticker. Could you let your wife know I like long walks on the beach?