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Candorville

Comics about parental controls.

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Result page:     (9 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-02-14 parental control 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-02-14 Pub. Date: 2016-02-14
Image Number: 138656
Caption: I put spyware on my son's computer. Last night, I saw what he's been looking at. Now I feel so guilty. He was watching dozens of Youtube videos detailing the theory that Jar Jar Binks was actually the most powerful evil Jedi in all of "Star Wars." I watched them all. They showed clips from the prequels where Jar Jar was clearly using the Jedi mind trick to manipulate everyone around him. Isaac Asimov was a huge "Star Wars" inspiration. These videos pointed out how Binks is eerily similar to a deceptively buffoonish character named "The Mule" in Asimov's "Foundation" series. It's undeniable. Jar Jar was the real "Phantom Menace," and Lucas must've abandoned that whole idea when we all jumped down his throat about the character. So ... you feel guilty for spying on your child since he wasn't doing anything wrong? I feel guilty for giving George Lucas such a hard time about Phantom Menace. The man was a genius.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-09-07 parental control 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-09-07 Pub. Date: 2014-09-07
Image Number: 115372
Caption: I taught Lionel how to call 911. WHAT?! What that little two-year-old boy ever done to you, Big L? Huh? Cops be outta control, bruh. If there a emergency an' he call 911, there a 50/50 chance the police'll help … an' a 50/50 chance they gonna knock down the door without a warrant, toss in a flashbang grenade, an' pepper spray your toddler before draggin' his dad out in the hallway half naked. What is you thinkin' Big L? He's be better off if you teach him to call Domino's. Well, they would probably get there faster.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-11-23 parental control 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-11-23 Pub. Date: 2013-11-23
Image Number: 104087
Caption: Kids are put on this earth for one reason only: To make sure adults don't get any sleep. It's a vast conspiracy run by a cabal of population-control fanatics. Kids equal sleep deprivation. Sleep deprivation equals early death. Early death equals seven billion people on earth instead of seventeen billion. So "they" encourage us to have more children so there'll be fewer people? I didn't say I had every little detail worked out. (Originally published on 2012-04-14).
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-11-05 parental control 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-11-05 Pub. Date: 2013-11-05
Image Number: 103506
Caption: twitter. @TheRealMissPiggy. MISS PIGGY: Ugh … I'll just say that anyone who posts racy photos of themselves online is a no-talent attention-smurf. Twitter @TheRealSmurfette. SMURFETTE: Christmas musta come early cuz Smurfette's 'bout to tear into some ham, ya'll. This is getting good, grampa. Don't make grampa have to turn off the internet.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-01-12 parental control 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-01-12 Pub. Date: 2013-01-12
Image Number: 91988
Caption: Say what? I bought Lionel his first iPad. But since he's only two, he's not allowed to use it on his own. I read him stories on it once a day for about an hour. The rest of the day, I keep it with me to make sure he doesn't get online or anything. In other words, you bought yourself an iPad. I'd never spend that much money on myself.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-04-14 parental control 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-04-14 Pub. Date: 2012-04-14
Image Number: 79199
Caption: Kids are put on this earth for one reason only: To make sure adults don't get any sleep. It's a vast conspiracy run by a cabal of population-control fanatics. Kids equal sleep deprivation. Sleep deprivation equals early death. Early death equals seven billion people on earth instead of seventeen billion. So "they" encourage us to have more children so there'll be fewer people? I didn't say I had every little detail worked out.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-10-20 parental control 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-10-20 Pub. Date: 2007-10-20
Image Number: 18936
Caption: You get five minutes. Don't try to make him talk if he isn't ready. You'll traumatize him. And no trying to teach him about science fiction or fantasy stuff. It's all nonsense. Can you say "Lord Voldemort" for Daddy? You bugged his diaper. A mother's prerogative.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-10-19 parental control 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-10-19 Pub. Date: 2007-10-19
Image Number: 18935
Caption: Our son's gonna stand under these stars one night, Roxanne. And he's gonna say, "Poppa, what are those?" And I'm gonna say "Ask your mother. I'm not allowed to talk about it." I said he can't watch "Battlestar Galatica" and I meant it. He's already one, he's falling behind!
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-05-05 parental control 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-05-05 Pub. Date: 2007-05-05
Image Number: 17069
Caption: Hi, Dr. Sadie, I just wanna say Alec Baldwin's a horrible father for yelling at his kid over the phone. Mommy I'm hungry. They should take away his visitation rights if he -- Kate, Mommy's on the radio. Be good -- if he can't control… Mommy! Kate, I told you, be quiet. Mommy's on the radio -- if he can't control his temper, he sho... Mommy MOMMY Mom- Mom MOMMY mommy! For the last time Kate, shut up! Mommy's on the @#*& RADIO! The Dr. Sadie show will be right back.
     
Result page:     (9 images)