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Candorville

Comics about being older .

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Result page:    2  3  Next  (59 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-12-19 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-12-19 Pub. Date: 2019-12-19
Image Number: 180858
Caption: I asked Momma why she has Hazel Scott's piano in her basement. What'd she say? She said back in the 1930s, my Grandma played in an all-women's band with Hazel Scott in New York. She wouldn't tell me how she got the piano, but she said it involved a poker game, a bottle of scotch and Eleanor Roosevelt. You ever get the impression the older folks had more interesting lives than we do? They had no Twitter, so they had to go do stuff.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-10-13 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-10-13 Pub. Date: 2019-10-13
Image Number: 179803
Caption: The other day, my little girl insisted that our dog was a horse. Dr. Noodle. So I took her to a ranch and showed her a real horse. She said This is a horsey? Then … our doggie is a doggie. That evening, we had dinner with my dad. He said The President has never lied. That shocked me. So I pulled up the Washington Post's list of over 12,000 lies the President's told. He dismissed it all as fake news, called reporters Enemies of the people, and said Jeff Bezos and everyone who buys from Amazon are of questionable citizenship. I still don't think it's wide of you to refuse to talk to anyone older than three from now on. Do you happen to know any toddlers with a psychiatric degree.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-11 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-11 Pub. Date: 2019-08-11
Image Number: 178906
Caption: I'll have a gentle flower chamomile tea. How so I know you're you? Today's special. Latte + 1hr web $12.50. Pardon? The real Uncle Mort always orders espresso. But a month ago, just for laughs, I took a picture of him with Faceapp, that app that show what you'll look like decades older. Then we discovered the app's fine print says you're granting the Russians who made it permission to use your photos for any reason. How do I know you're not a Russian spy surgically altered to look like Uncle Mort? (Words indicating Russian language). I mean, Don't be paranoid. Yeah ... Yeah I guess you're right.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-08 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-08 Pub. Date: 2019-08-08
Image Number: 178909
Caption: Remember how I said ICE detained that 18-year-old American citizen for nearly a month? He said when they finally let him go, he'd lost over 20 pounds because food was scarce in the camp. Detainees have said the older kids often give their rations to the little ones to keep them from crying because the crying angers the guards. What country is this?! Careful, if they think you don't know, they might come for you.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-07-11 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-07-11 Pub. Date: 2018-07-11
Image Number: 172714
Caption: In the refugee detention center. Pardon me, sir, when are we to be set free? BACK, MEAT. "Meat"?! I'll have you know I was wearing fatigues and slogging across Europe for Uncle Sam before your daddy was spawned! A LITTLE RESPECT, SIR! You're right. Back, MR. Meat. That's better.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-07-07 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-07-07 Pub. Date: 2018-07-07
Image Number: 172692
Caption: 1982. Momma says she wants me to be the next Thurgood Marshall. So I asked who that is, and she said he desegregated the schools. And I asked what "desegregated" means, and she said "I'll tell you when you're older." It was at that point that I realized Momma was probably just making up words. What's a "Thurgood"? No, that one makes sense. What has a Thursday ever been bad?
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-02-17 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-02-17 Pub. Date: 2018-02-17
Image Number: 168418
Caption: I realized this morning I'm not nineteen anymore, Susan. I was riding my bike faster than I had in years. I was flying! Pedaling hard and strong. I'd just hit warp speed … when an actual nineteen-year-old zoomed past me going twice as fast. He wasn't even breaking a sweat. I'm sure he was working hard too, Lemont. He was sipping a Slurpee and dribbling a basketball.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-12-18 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-12-18 Pub. Date: 2016-12-18
Image Number: 151614
Caption: I wish I could fly, Big L. I know what you mean. Ever since I donned my first pair of underoos, I wanted to fly too. But the older I get, the more I realize it's not all it's cracked up to be. First of all, there's all the stuff in the air you'd crash into: birds, helicopters, jets, drones, power lines ... Then there are all the idiots who'd take a shot at you. And if you flew high enough to avoid all that, you'd freeze your nuggets off. Flying's one of those powers you think would be cool, but really wouldn't be. Like invisibility. I don't know what you talkin' about, bruh. I just meant I'm on the no-fly list. If you were an invisible hero, people would still see your clothes. You'd have to fight crime naked.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-07-10 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-07-10 Pub. Date: 2016-07-10
Image Number: 144955
Caption: Let's watch "Lou Grant" on Hulu. "Lou Grant"? Ain't that that show your momma used to watch when we was kids? Yeah. I ran out of things to watch, so I figured I'd finally check out some of the shows that bored me to death when I was young. It was really depressing. If it was depressin', why you wanna watch it? I mean it's depressing how good it is. Our parents' generation had writers and actors who knew how to use mature, flawed characters to tell stories that really examined human nature in all its intricacies. And it's set in a major newspaper back when they were still widely read and mostly family-owned, and saw what they did as a calling. When I think of all the time I wasted watching "Sesame Street" when I could've watched this ... I don't watch nothin' older than the milk in my fridge, bruh. That's policy.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-03-11 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-03-11 Pub. Date: 2016-03-11
Image Number: 140182
Caption: I wish I could go back in time and tell myself it's not too late. When I was nine, momma asked me if I wanted guitar lessons. But I told her no, because I thought I was too old. Clyde had been playing guitar since he was three. At nine, I thought I had already missed my chance. If I'd started learning when I was nine, I'd have been playing for decades now. I'd be a master at it by now. Well why don't you take some lessons now? Are you kidding? At MY age?
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-12-04 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-12-04 Pub. Date: 2015-12-04
Image Number: 135927
Caption: Son, your daddy met a woman he likes a lot. What would you think if he started bringing her around to meet you? Ith the woman mommy? No, son, she's not mommy. She's someone else. Doth the woman wike to pway cawth? Yes, son. I'm sure the woman would like to play cars. How do you know? Have you pwayed cawth with her? I'll answer that when you're much older. The woman theemth actheptable.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-09-03 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-09-03 Pub. Date: 2015-09-03
Image Number: 131901
Caption: I feel like when I was a kid, there was a lot more life out there. More butterflies. More lizards. More roly-poly bugs. Yeah. Same here. I always thought that was because the older I get, the less attention I pay to stuff like that. But then I read that we've finally gone ahead and caused the world's sixth great extinction event. Species are dying off 10,000 times faster than normal now. That's great news! It means the vanishing of butterflies isn't just me being self-absorbed.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-06-01 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-06-01 Pub. Date: 2015-06-01
Image Number: 127775
Caption: Daddy was having a nice dream, son. What happened in it? I don’t know. I was awakened by the sound of springs breaking. When I looked at my clock, I saw that it was 3:17 A.M. Do you know what people are supposed to be doing at 3:17 A.M.? Ithn't thith one of the thingth you're thuppothed to tell me when I'm older? (This cartoon was originally published on 2013-05-20).
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-05-20 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-05-20 Pub. Date: 2015-05-20
Image Number: 127173
Caption: I keep thinking about those people who died or got hurt when that train derailed. Dr. Noodle. It's 2015. I'm ok with not having flying cars, or jetpacks, or moving sidewalks. M.A. But we should at least have trains and tracks that can't toss us off to our deaths now. The older I get, the less I expect. That's perfectly normal, Lemont.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-05-02 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-05-02 Pub. Date: 2015-05-02
Image Number: 126135
Caption: OK, I have to admit, that was a really good film. What was your favorite part? Avengers. My favorite part was seeing Elizabeth Olsen play the Scarlet Witch. I remember when she was the baby on "Full House." So not only did I get to feel incredibly old, I also got to be distracted by the image of "Uncle Jessie" singing to her that kept running through my head. She wasn't on "Full House." Those were her older twin sisters. Avengers. Well then they should've put "she wasn't on' Full House'" on the posters.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-11-05 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-11-05 Pub. Date: 2014-11-05
Image Number: 118497
Caption: Well, the republicans did pretty well yesterday. Of course they did. For the first time, the younger generations are doing worse than the older ones, and our influence in the world is waning. Whenever a civilization's in decline, whoever's better at pointing fingers wins control. Little known fact: before he was emperor, Napoleon taught a class on scapegoating at a junior college. I thought you were going to stay away from Wikipedia.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-10-09 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-10-09 Pub. Date: 2014-10-09
Image Number: 117065
Caption: What makes us think we're the first civilization on Earth? You got five seconds, Big L. Five seconds for what? To make it clear what this conversation has to do with C-Dog. Before we got here, there 4 … were billions of years of plate tectonics that 3 ... would've melted or buried any trace of older civilization 2 ... beneath tons of rock. 1 ... NOT EVERYTHING HAS TO BE ABOUT YOU!!! Time's up.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-05-03 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-05-03 Pub. Date: 2014-05-03
Image Number: 110714
Caption: I took Lionel to his first baseball game the other day. I hadn't been to a Candorville Chokers game since I was a kid. Back then, two Choker Dogs, Cokes and fries cost $8. Last night, it cost me $38. Back then, all the players were like ten years older than I was. But now, they are all like ten years younger. "National Pastime" my behind, it should be national "past my time." Baseball still around?
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-10-29 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-10-29 Pub. Date: 2013-10-29
Image Number: 103218
Caption: Are there any job openings at your ad agency? Really? Lemont, I'm so excited! It's about time you realized there's no future in journalism, that your newspaper is dying, and that it's just stupid at your age to keep wasting time in a dead-end job. … I meant 'cause I know a kid whose mom needs a job. Oh, well ... I ... ay ay. What do you mean "at my age"? (Cartoon originally published 2011-04-19 and 2013-03-12).
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-07-05 older 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-07-05 Pub. Date: 2013-07-05
Image Number: 98736
Caption: What are you looking at, Lemont? A gray hair. Who asked you?
     
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