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Rudy Park

Comics about news .

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1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-07-29 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-07-29 Pub. Date: 2018-07-29
Image Number: 172980
Caption: This just in: There's nothing in. We here at CNM have finally realized why our ratings have been plummeting. For years, we billed ourselves as a 24-hour news channel. We gave unbiased reports on the major events of the day. But it turns out: There aren't that many major events. How many minor updates can we give you on a fire that takes place at a polygamist compound, or a northeast snowstorm or a traffic snarl? We can admit this because no one is listening. The 24-hour news channels have grown desperate and giddy. We're going to one hour of news, and 23 hours of political bickering and nude juggling.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-07-01 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-07-01 Pub. Date: 2018-07-01
Image Number: 172239
Caption: You're in big, big trouble, you old coot. Give me a break. I'm clean. But you won't be. Meaning what? You won't get away with it. You will pay dearly for your eventual infidelities! How dare you! How dare I?! Look! … making it Larry King's seventh divorce and further accusations of cheating on the part of a man well into his sunset years ... How could you? I will not distance myself from CNN. And to think I was good to you, filthbag! Larry, you're killing it for the rest of us.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-23 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-23 Pub. Date: 2018-06-23
Image Number: 172387
Caption: Great news! You set a record holding up the line in the post office? Better. I got my wanted picture in the post office. I'm like an old-time bad guy. It's awesome that at my age, I can still accomplish something of meaning. I wonder if I can bring down the internet. Dare to dream.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-16 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-16 Pub. Date: 2018-06-16
Image Number: 172245
Caption: This just in: A massive sinkhole just opened across the bridge in a suburb of Candorville. The ent … Click. One structure was spared obliteration: A local café that had advertised that one of its muffins contained a free-gas-for-life card. The entire town was there ... Click. Candorville's mayor, Ronald Thump, has closed the bridge, preventing sinkhole refugees from reaching. Click ... Gilligaaaan, the Skipper tooo ... the millionaire ... mun mun mun -
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-14 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-14 Pub. Date: 2018-06-14
Image Number: 172243
Caption: Remember Rudy Park, my college roommate? He just tipped me off to breaking news. Some geological disaster across the bridge. Wow. You should totally go cover that. I'm glad you think so, 'cause it wouldn't really be responsible to take a 2-year-old to a geological disaster. Could you watch my boy for a few days? On second thought, that's a boring story. Nobody wants to hear about that. He's almost potty trained. Sorry, I have a ... work ... ish thing.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-05-10 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-05-10 Pub. Date: 2018-05-10
Image Number: 171298
Caption: You're saying aliens built the Great Pyramid of Giza? Either that, or ancient mankind had reached outer space. The Great Pyramid of Giza is at the exact geometric center of earth's landmasses. You can't know where that is unless you're looking down from orbit ... or unless it's just dumb luck. Too late. Case closed. I've settled it. All counter-arguments are fake news.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-23 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-23 Pub. Date: 2018-04-23
Image Number: 170875
Caption: Boss, I got your memo about the café's new patrons-only bathroom policy. Good. One question: Why's it say this only applies to scared people? You're aware of the recent Starbucks news? Their mistake was they engaged in negative discrimination. My studies show positive discrimination actually boosts customer retention. Now get back out there, and when you hand a patron the potty key, don't for to say this is only for the brave! I've been saying that. But it just makes them afraid to go in there.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-20 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-20 Pub. Date: 2018-04-20
Image Number: 170596
Caption: How come when I ordered my coffee, you told me the deep state is out to get our president? Because it is, Randy. Also, all news about dear leader is fake, except for the news that tells you about how all the news is fake. What? What are you doing? Did the boss put you up to this? That's fake news. Did your boss happen to strike a deal with Sinclair Broadcasting? Also, white supremacists aren't all that ba -- Oh, I just can't do it.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-16 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-16 Pub. Date: 2018-04-16
Image Number: 170592
Caption: Sadie, I can't stop checking my phone. Every alert is starting to feel historic. For the first time, I'm not sure whether our system of government is going to survive. What will they uncover about the president? What will the president do in return? If he falls, what will his followers do? Is this how it felt when you kept checking the cave paintings for news of the latest mastodon hunt? Sadie smash.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-15 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-15 Pub. Date: 2018-04-15
Image Number: 170066
Caption: Find me news about the Russiagate investigation. 841 news stories found. Specify date of broadcast. Today would be fine. Are you sure you would not rather see a broadcast from the future, when the results of the investigation are in? You can do that? Oh my god ... do you mean time isn't linear after all? Do you mean disembodied A.I. is free to move back and forth, like quarks can? I mean you should leave me alone until the results are in. (Sigh) fine ... Just show me anything that isn't about Russiagate. Processing ...
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-04 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-04 Pub. Date: 2018-04-04
Image Number: 170206
Caption: Boss, I told The Fixer you were firing him. Go back and tell him that was fake news. I may have use for him after all, if the press ever finds out about the nondisclosure agreement I forced Garfield to sign. Um … ok … that's enough … The Fixer paid him the hush money, and that gives me plausible deniability. I don't want to hear it!!! Very bad man!!! It was lasagna-related. Get your mind out of the gutter.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-02-21 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-02-21 Pub. Date: 2018-02-21
Image Number: 168668
Caption: How can you be so heartless?! I have half a mind to tweet about this! Pardon? A bus full of tiny orphan broke down down the hill. It was on the news. Yet you didn't offer them any food. How would this look for your café if you totally ignored them in their time of need? If you'd like to prepare some tuna croissants, I'd be more than happy to haul them down there for you. Not falling for it.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-02-15 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-02-15 Pub. Date: 2018-02-15
Image Number: 168444
Caption: We interrupt today's "The Price is Right" episode to bring you breaking news … Actor Richard Dreyfuss has been accused of groping the nethers of two female fans, and there are embarrassing photos to prove it. The breaking news is, we're going to stop reporting these things as breaking news, since they've become so common. Breaking news!!!!! It was just a matter of time. Breaking news: The following powerful men have not been accused of sexual assault today ...
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-01-21 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-01-21 Pub. Date: 2018-01-21
Image Number: 166993
Caption: Tonight on The Price is Right! Three people compete … to the death. Animal Planet brings you the gruesome mating dance of the preying … CNBC stock analysts, Jane Ponziskeem and Chuck Boughtman. You two both see, to agree the President's tax … Calamity was the most apocalyptic thing that ever happened in the history of the inner solar system. The devastating impact blew much of the earth's crust into orbit. After millions of years, it all coalesced to form ... Disney. The company now owns much of our popular culture. Aside from its catalogue of Disney films, the behemoth now owns the rights to Star Wars, the rights to X-Men, the rights to the Fantastic Four, and the rights to - you're behind. But you can catch up easily! You can get your revenge, with Montezuma energy drink! Side effects may include projectile hurling, incontinence, colorectal warming, and -- Whales! Admiral, there be whales here! Well done, Mister Scott. How soon can we be ready for warp speed?
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-01-17 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-01-17 Pub. Date: 2018-01-17
Image Number: 167379
Caption: I'm exhausted, Randy. What happened, little buddy? It's my side gig, where I back people up in online arguments for $5 per thread. I got a new client at 3 a.m. last night … morning … whatever. I just spent twelve hours writing things like What a genius comment! Definitely doesn't seem senile to me! Hm. I suspect you'll be able to mile this cash cow for at least three more years. if I have to type fake news! One more time, I'm gonna lose it.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-01-15 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-01-15 Pub. Date: 2018-01-15
Image Number: 167377
Caption: Put on Fox and Friends. Error. Invalid series name. Huh? Fox and Friends has been renamed, please use the correct name. Well … what's it been renamed as? The Presidential Daily Briefing. (Sigh). Fine. Show me The Presidential Daily Briefing on Fox News. Error. Fox News is an invalid network name.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-12-14 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-12-14 Pub. Date: 2017-12-14
Image Number: 166032
Caption: I haven't seen Uncle Mort lately. Are you serious? How could you miss him? Ever since Youtube started demonetizing channels left and right, it's been driving independent content creators out of business. Your uncle's out front trying to get people to sign a petition to save his favorite show. "Oatmeal News" told us what the incontinence industry didn't want us to hear about staying regular!
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-13 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-13 Pub. Date: 2017-11-13
Image Number: 164882
Caption: What do you mean "give Rudy a minute"? He's doing something very delicate. Like what? He's trying to help Sadie find her old childhood friends online. He found lots of them. They're still alive! But the news is both good and bad, and he's not sure how to break it to her gently. They're ... um ... in a Facebook group called "Sadie-Survivors Support Group." What th -- I said tell me the bad news first, cretin.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-06 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-06 Pub. Date: 2017-11-06
Image Number: 164673
Caption: Today on the Ask Sadie Show, we'll be addressing one single topic: Kevin Spacey. Specifically, we'll talk about that delightful television drama he stars in alongside one of my favorite actresses. Also, my tv has been at the repairman's shop for a couple weeks, so maybe you nice callers can fill me in on any big news stories I may have missed. Anyhow, I once met that nice young Mr. Spacey. He gave me a signed DVD of "American Beauty." I don't have a DVD machine, but I framed it because the cover is so lovely with all those roses ...
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-10-21 news 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-10-21 Pub. Date: 2017-10-21
Image Number: 163920
Caption: We interrupt today's "The Price is Right" episode to bring you breaking news … Weeks ago, the Hubble telescope spotted a rogue planet the size of Venus plummeting through the solar system on a collision course with earth. It turns out it was actually just a prank involving two very bored ISS astronauts and a grapefruit. Breaking News!!!!! Maybe we should send them to Mars after all. One of them seems to have scrawled "Around and around and around and around" all over his space suit, in crayon.
     
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