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Candorville

Comics about mine, mines and mining.

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Result page:    2  3  Next  (47 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-06-02 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-06-02 Pub. Date: 2019-06-02
Image Number: 177793
Caption: I've noticed a 25.9% uptick in impeachment talk among the patrons. I hadn't noticed. I've also noticed your complete and utter failure to depict those talking about it as sore losers … As delusional, evil, insane cretins having temper tantrums. So what if my disgraced former lawyer says he bribed the city council on my behalf to forbid any cafes but mine within city limits? What about the phenomenal job growth I've caused? I now employ you, a Roomba and, allegedly, nine out of ten city council members. Now get out there and pit our patrons against one another by declaring this witch hunt to be an illegal coup. And remind them you can't impeach a cafe owner for creating a great underground economy. Very bad man.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-05-20 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-05-20 Pub. Date: 2019-05-20
Image Number: 177706
Caption: Sunset gets later and later every day, little buddy. So what? So, sunset happens later in the day. That means I can accomplish a lot more before smooching hour. I can run an extra ten miles. I can chop an extra cord firewood. I can catch an extra school of fish. I can prepare for my date my mining an extra nugget of lip balm from my secret lip balm quarry. I can download 30 extra books I'll never read.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-11-21 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-11-21 Pub. Date: 2018-11-21
Image Number: 175065
Caption: Dick, a friend of mine is sitting in a plane that's been stranded on the runway for six hours. We handle all the TSA's advertising. I knew they don't have authority over that, but … Say no more, Ms. Garcia. You want me to call them … and get your friend released from that plane by any means necessary. No, never mind. I'll call them myself. I'll tell them of his extensive travels in Syria.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-09-06 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-09-06 Pub. Date: 2018-09-06
Image Number: 173882
Caption: Susan? Of all the haircuts I've ever had, which one was your favorite? Oh, that's easy. The high-top fade you had back in high school. That was amazing. Mine too. I went to Roscoe's Cuts to see if old Roscoe could do it, just like he did in the nineties. He said he's not sure my hair's thick enough to get up that high anymore. Oh. Well, there's nothin wrong with a low-top fade. He said it's almost time for a no-top fade.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-06-12 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-06-12 Pub. Date: 2018-06-12
Image Number: 172213
Caption: Meanwhile at a café in neighboring Canardville … Have you gathered all the regulars and local animals two-by-two, minion? You were serious about that, boss? Totally unrelated topic: Let's say thousands of years ago, a big oil company was bribing a local shopkeeper to let them use his basement. Let's call him ... oh, I don't know ... Noah. Let's say big oil was using Noah's Cafe to conduct an illegal fracking operation. Let's say this type of mining is ... a tad risky ... and let's say big oil assured Noah that his cafe would be the one place in town that wouldn't cave in. Very very bad man.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-04-29 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-04-29 Pub. Date: 2018-04-29
Image Number: 170626
Caption: I read your article called We Still Have Slavery in America. What a load of nonsense. Everyone knows our dear, sweet and wonderful Congress abolished slavery with the thirteenth amendment. That's right. But that same 13th amendment says Except as punishment for crime whereof the party shall have been duly connected. Trump calls mass incarceration "good start". Black and brown people are stopped more often, and convicted more harshly than white people who've done that same stuff, our prisons are mostly black and brown. They force these people to work. Sometimes for next to nothing. But often for nothing at all. They lease convicts out to work in mines, to pick cotton on farms, to sew lingerie, to build weapons of war, and if they refuse to work for free, they're punished. Yeah, well ... slavery was in the 19th century. This is the 21st, ipso facto, it can't be slavery. Haven't you wondered why they've sent millions and millions to prison for smoking the wrong plant?
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-07-18 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-07-18 Pub. Date: 2017-07-18
Image Number: 160502
Caption: I'm so glad I caught you before you left town, Vancouver. So am I, Candorville. But why'd you want to meet here? Why not in the city? I wanted to see where you live. I wanted to meet your little boy. I wanted to show you this video a friend of mine sent me of you cheating on me with some muscle-bound oaf, and I didn't want the horrible memory of me dumping you to taint my city. Also, I wanted a caramel-kiwi mocha, and the only cafe that makes it is out here. Wait ... Back up?
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-10-05 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-10-05 Pub. Date: 2016-10-05
Image Number: 149308
Caption: Dick, a friend of mine is sitting in a plane that's been stranded on the runway for six hours. We handle all the TSA's advertising. I know they don't have authority over that, but … say no more, Ms. Garcia. You want me to call them … and get your friend released from that plane by any means necessary. No, never mind. I'll call them myself. I'll tell them of his extensive travels in Syria. Advertising Executive of the Year. 2006.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-09-30 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-09-30 Pub. Date: 2016-09-30
Image Number: 149029
Caption: What the -- ?! Hey, whose luggage is this over my seat?! It's mine. I just didn't feel like lugging it back here. You're throwing off the whole system! It's gonna be anarchy now! There's room for yours back here, pal.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-08-03 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-08-03 Pub. Date: 2015-08-03
Image Number: 130583
Caption: I don't understand why Bernie Sanders isn't polling better among minorities, Clyde. He's our best ally in the race. He's fought against mass incarceration and mandatory minimum sentences for decades. He wants undergraduate education to be free to students, like K-12. He's strong on voting rights ... Yeh, but bruh ... the man name is "Bernie." That's like Bert an' Ernie put together. A muppet don't have no business askin' for my vote. I can't believe your vote counts as much as mine.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-06-17 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-06-17 Pub. Date: 2015-06-17
Image Number: 128378
Caption: Hi, you don't know me, but your son was bullying mine at the playground today and you didn't make him apologize. Who is this? How did you get my phone number? I took a photo of you as you drove off, and uploaded it to Google image search which linked me to your blog. I got your number from your domain name registry. I'm pretty sure that's stalking. Keep letting your gargoyle push my son off the swings with impunity, and you'll find out about stalking.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-05-10 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-05-10 Pub. Date: 2015-05-10
Image Number: 126136
Caption: I'm reading a book called "Leviathan Wakes." It tells a story from the perspective of two different protagonists. Dr. Noodle. Neither knows just how much their stores are connected. It's like I've always thought: what if I'm not the only protagonist in my own life? What if there's somebody out there who's living the other half of my story? What if we're both on separate roads that are fated to converge at some pivotal, all-important moment? And what if I don't recognize this person's significance to my life and so we fail to connect?! I still think boring everyone you meet with your whole life story is a bad idea. But if I don't recognize their significance, they might recognize mine.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-03-06 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-03-06 Pub. Date: 2015-03-06
Image Number: 123666
Caption: There is an easy trick for filling in awkward pauses in conversations. Ask the other person about themselves. That's everyone's favorite topic. Not mine. Mine is open. I couldn’t care less. (This cartoon was originally published on 2013-03-22).
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-06-01 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-06-01 Pub. Date: 2014-06-01
Image Number: 111415
Caption: Dear Son … I'm your long-lost father. I'm sorry I wasn't there to help your momma raise you. She and I … well, let's just say it was better for you that I was not around. Sometimes the only thing a father can do, to make sure his some is raised right, is to leave. But you've grown into a fine man, Son. You're raising a son of your own, by yourself. You've become the man I always wish I could've been. The only thing that would make me prouder is if you would click here to purchase Awesomecorp's brand new kitten-flavored toothpaste. Never posting anything personal online again. I want your breath to be fresher than mine ever was, Son.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-09-29 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-09-29 Pub. Date: 2013-09-29
Image Number: 101660
Caption: I just saw "The Business of Being Born." Ever seen that? What that is? It's a documentary about how birth doesn’t need to be treated like an illness. Did you know America has a really high infant mortality rate, even though we have the costliest birth procedures in the world? Did you know the drugs they pump into women in hospitals may be really bad for both mother and child? Did you know we MEN, so that don't have spit to do with us? YOU WERE BORN, WEREN'T YOU?! That's momma business, not mine.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-09-26 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-09-26 Pub. Date: 2013-09-26
Image Number: 101945
Caption: Does your mom ever complain that you don’t call her enough? Thug 4 Life. I always get her voice mail. Maybe she don’t remember it's mine when it come up on her caller ID. She is pretty confused these days. I mean, if you don’t want someone to ask for nothin', why would you start every sentence with "Whachoowant?!"? Good talk, Clyde.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-09-01 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-09-01 Pub. Date: 2013-09-01
Image Number: 100557
Caption: Kelly contacted me again. Dr. Noodle. It's been two years. I'm over her. I've moved on. I'm happy with someone else. But all of a sudden she emails me. She wrote "Guess who I'm dating? A guy named DRUDGE VASSALE. Isn't that weird?" I mean, MY name is DRUDGE VASSAL. She dating a guy whose name is almost exactly like mine! Does it mean the universe is trying to tell us something? Does it mean she and I are supposed to be together? It means she knows exactly what to say to make you obsess over her. Who am I to argue with the universe?
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-05-28 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-05-28 Pub. Date: 2013-05-28
Image Number: 97400
Caption: The guys watch "The Maury Show." Brian, Linda accuses you of being the father of her baby. That ain't true, Maury. Yeah, I have 29 other kids, but I ain't claimin' one that ain't mine … … Because I have INTEGRITY. It's like I can feel my synapses just giving up. He do make a good point. Thug 4 Life.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-03-22 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-03-22 Pub. Date: 2013-03-22
Image Number: 94738
Caption: There is an easy trick for filling in awkward pauses in conversations. Ask the other person about themselves. That's everyone's favorite topic. Not mine. Mine is open. I couldn’t care less.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-09-26 mine 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-09-26 Pub. Date: 2012-09-26
Image Number: 87792
Caption: What can I do to get you back, Brown? I've already offered you your old cubicle, less pay and insufficient respect. No? Not enough? The Candorville Chronicle. … Jane, see if that old rusty death trap of mine is still in the river. The Candorville Chronicle. Would your very own company car seal the deal? The Candorville Chronicle.
     
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