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361. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-12-05 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-12-08 Pub. Date: 2006-12-05
Image Number: 15504
Caption: I still can't believe Kramer, dawg, he broke the deal! Deal? The deal! They get to keep the media, the government, the unions, industry, etc. and in return, we get sole custody of their insults, like "soul food" an' "n*****." First of all "soul food" was never an insult. I guess you never ate ham hocks.
     
362. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-10-25 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-10-25 Pub. Date: 2006-10-25
Image Number: 15027
Caption: Last night I dreamt the journalists society sent me a letter saying I won an award for my work … but you stole my mail before I could see it and then impersonated my so they'd give you my award money. Dag. That's strange, L. Yo' dream's exactly like what really happened. I know. Maybe you psychic, or ... GIVE MY $%^& AWARD!!!
     
363. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-10-24 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-10-24 Pub. Date: 2006-10-24
Image Number: 15026
Caption: Zzzz… In other news, the local professional journalists society gave their annual "courage" award to Lemont Brown today … for his professional expose that led to the resignation of Mayor Patsy Ernesto. What the?! I won an award? Oh dear lord … I've gotta tell Susan! I've gotta tell ... Brown, pictured here, accepted the award at a banquet this morning. ... Clyde? Yo, I wanna thank all my #$%^&.
     
364. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-10-21 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-10-21 Pub. Date: 2006-10-21
Image Number: 15024
Caption: Now I lay me down to sleep. I pray the Lord my soul to keep. If I get e-mail 'fore I wake … I pray the Lord don't let it be from a perverted old congressman. Too much CNN for this guy.
     
365. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-10-18 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-10-18 Pub. Date: 2006-10-18
Image Number: 15021
Caption: Look at you, you're finally a professional writer for the Candorville Chronicle. I'm a blogger for their website. What's the difference? Here's my first paycheck. … Shut up. You could make more money recycling this than cashing it. SHUT UP!
     
366. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-10-11 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-10-17 Pub. Date: 2006-10-11
Image Number: 14972
Caption: Candorville Chronicle Managing Editor James Olsen interviews Lemont for a job … Is your name really Jimmy Olsen? Omigawd, this is like fate! I'm the biggest Superman fan on the planet! I still wear Superman underoos! I've got them on right now! I probably shoulda made that an internal monologue. Prob'ly.
     
367. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-10-12 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-10-17 Pub. Date: 2006-10-12
Image Number: 14973
Caption: The Candorville Chronicle interviews Lemont for a job. I've been following your work, son. Quite impressive. Ever since your series on Hurricane Katrina I've been wanting to get you on staff. You investigate corruption wherever it may be. You leave no stone unturned in your quest for truth. That's exactly what the Chronicle wants more of. I think I'm gonna like it here. ... as long as you leave our advertisers alone.
     
368. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-10-13 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-10-17 Pub. Date: 2006-10-13
Image Number: 14974
Caption: Working for the mainstream media is tough. So much pressure to come up with stories. Oh, dear lord, what do I write about? Must … have …. story …. by deadline. Across town … So you’re saying no matter who a voter picks for mayor these machines will say I've won the election? Liebold. Ah! I've got it! Paris Hilton said something stupid today .... tap tap tap.
     
369. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-10-16 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-10-17 Pub. Date: 2006-10-16
Image Number: 14977
Caption: 2001. Congress passed the so-called "Patriot Act" today even though many of them hadn't even read it. ZZZZZ. 2005. Today's top story: Congressman caught selling their votes to the highest bidder! ZZZZZ. 2006. Congress lets the President torture people and weakens habeas corpus, the most important legal principle of the last millennium. ZZZZZ. 2006. Sex! Sex! Sex! Congressman SEXually harasses kids with SEX-filled e-mails about SEX! Munch munch munch.
     
370. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-09-17 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-09-18 Pub. Date: 2006-09-17
Image Number: 14701
Caption: Mainstream Media. Middle east war! Middle east war! Middle east war! Middle east war! Middle east war! Middle east war! Middle east war! Middle east war! Middle east war! Middle east war! Middle east war! Middle east war! Cnkdlgyegyend.ffddhhuoeurhgytri Middle east war! Middle east war! Wait ... what?
     
371. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-09-10 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-09-14 Pub. Date: 2006-09-10
Image Number: 14636
Caption: Joe Lieberman's a moderate senator. Wuzzat? I said, Joe Lieberman's a moderate senator. Really? But he's to the right of most Americans on the biggest issues of our times! Like withdrawing forces from Iraq, privatizing social security, and raising taxes to fund universal health insurance. How can you describe someone like that as "moderate"? His opponent is part of the anti-war fringe. "Fringe"? Most Americans are against the Iraq occupation. How can you describe that as "fringe"? Who are you, anyway? Mainstream media. Nice to meet you.
     
372. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-08-25 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-09-05 Pub. Date: 2006-08-25
Image Number: 14519
Caption: Thug 4 Life Clyde, you ever get the feeling something's gone horribly wrong? Like you went to sleep one night, and woke up in some dark, parallel universe filled with death, carnage, bombs, government spying, dirty elections… …a universe where black is white, up is down, and nobody but you seems to care? (Sigh) So how was "Jerry Springer" today? Some dude was his own grandfather. It was the bomb!
     
373. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-08-29 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-08-29 Pub. Date: 2006-08-29
Image Number: 14548
Caption: In an alternate universe, the events on 1773 happen instead in 2003 … I'm Wolf Blitzer! And you're watching CNN! Our main story! Riot in Boston! Several crates of tea dumped into the harbor! Here to talk about it! The King's Press Secretary! Scott McClellan! Wolf, this King will never back down in the face of terrorist threats. Other news! Michael Jackson on trial!
     
374. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-08-13 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-08-13 Pub. Date: 2006-08-13
Image Number: 14364
Caption: President Bush, most Americans favor embryonic stem cell research. Americans say these embryos will be thrown away anyway… Why not use them to find cures for horrible diseases? Why let the embryos perish in vain when they can save millions of lives? Well, don't ask me, Bob. Just ask the embryos. I have a couple here with me, let 'em talk for themselves. Golly, Bob, I'm a person too. I have dreams. I want to be a ballerina. Me too, Bob. I wanna be a professional wrestler. Sure, we're gonna be thrown away. But who's to say the garbage lady won't trip, and I'll end up implanted in her uterus, where I'll grow up and become a pretty dancer who wears tutus? I can see your lips moving, Mr. Bush. I like to dance. And I like to wrassle!
     
375. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-08-11 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-08-11 Pub. Date: 2006-08-11
Image Number: 14351
Caption: You're gonna keep flipping burgers at Pigville instead of trying for a high-paying job at the Chronicle… …'cause you're afraid you don't have what it takes to make it in the big leagues. As your best friend, I'll support your decision, Lemont. Even if you think it makes you a scared, stupid little worthless punk who's flushing his life down the toilet. Thanks, Susan. Don't mention it.
     
376. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-08-10 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-08-10 Pub. Date: 2006-08-10
Image Number: 14346
Caption: Brown, I want you to see something. What the-- that's my article from the Candorville Chronicle. Ain't every day we got a famous man working our cash register. It makes the other fellas proud. Makes us all proud, son. Wow. Thanks, Mr. Mallott. How 'bout a raise? Not that proud.
     
377. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-08-08 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-08-08 Pub. Date: 2006-08-08
Image Number: 14298
Caption: Why should I call the Chronicle for a job? What if I don't sound impressive on the phone? They reprinted an article from my blog without asking my permission! What if I talk them out of like me? I mean, that's just wrong. Unprincipled! I'll just screw it all up. You are impressive, they will like you, and you won't screw it up. Lady, we spend too much time together.
     
378. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-08-07 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-08-07 Pub. Date: 2006-08-07
Image Number: 14297
Caption: So Lemont, what did they say? Who? Y'know, the paper that reprinted an article from your blog last month. What did they say when you called them about a job? …called them? Ulcer coming on. If they like me that much, they should call me.
     
379. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-08-06 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-08-06 Pub. Date: 2006-08-06
Image Number: 14296
Caption: Dr. Noodle Couple Sessions Today My husband's a CEO. Ever since corporations took over the government through their armies of lobbyists and their control of the media, he's been… Yes, Mrs. Fitzhugh? Full of himself. Out of touch. Distant. Pish tosh, woman. There's nothing wrong with our marriage. He won't even, well... snuggle at night. How would that benefit the shareholders? Cancel my next five appointments. Did you hear yourself, Ebenezer? That's "Mr. Fitzhugh."
     
380. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-07-08 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-07-20 Pub. Date: 2006-07-08
Image Number: 14168
Caption: Lemont, I read you article calling for the mayor to resign. You mean my "blog," Susan. "Articles" are written by real journalists who people actually pay attention to. No, I meant your "article." Right here in today's Chronicle. "Reprinted for the online blog by Lemont Brown, one of the internet's rising stars." Wow. Isn't that cool, Lemont? Lemont?
     
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