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341. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-04-26 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-04-26 Pub. Date: 2007-04-26
Image Number: 17003
Caption: The Candorville Chronicle. Brown, what do you think about lug nuts? Lug nuts, Sir? The Dubois Family built us into one of the most respected newspapers in the nation. They're selling us, Brown, to the Trigon Corporation. You know what Trigon is known for, son? Hint: it ain't journalism. Are you sure that's water in your cup, sir? From now on, all you stories will be lug nut-friendly.
     
342. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-04-23 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-04-24 Pub. Date: 2007-04-23
Image Number: 17000
Caption: MSM Mainstream Media. Thank God for Culture Clash. Can't I just say one more thing about Don Imus? Get lost.
     
343. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-04-24 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-04-24 Pub. Date: 2007-04-24
Image Number: 17001
Caption: First they came for the racists, and I did not speak out for I was not a racist. Then they came for the homophobes, and I did not speak out for I was not a homophobic. Then they came for me, and there was no one left to speak. Right-wing talk show hosts are taking Don Imus's firing hard. "They" being the gays and the blacks, of course.
     
344. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-03-31 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-03-31 Pub. Date: 2007-03-31
Image Number: 16524
Caption: Ever notice how CNN's Baghdad Reporter Michael Ware always has exactly three days' growth of beard on his face? Every day, same amount of stubble. What's that tell you, Susan? That you watch way too much news? It tells you the news is all fake!
     
345. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-02-26 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-03-11 Pub. Date: 2007-02-26
Image Number: 16385
Caption: 2006 Movie star Mel Gibson says horrible things about Jewish people. Stay tuned for several weeks of coverage about this outrage. 2006 TV star Michael Richards says horrible things about black people. Stay tuned for several weeks of coverage about this outrage. 2007 NBA star Tim Hardaway says horrible things about gay people. ...in other news... zzzzz
     
346. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-02-27 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-03-11 Pub. Date: 2007-02-27
Image Number: 16386
Caption: I'm tired of Libs saying Fox News is racist just 'cause their "Daily Show" rip-off made fun of Barack Obama. So what if the bit started by showing a bunch of Africans jumping around? That doesn't mean Fox was playing on racial fears. I mean, since when have white people feared mobs of unruly blacks?
     
347. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-02-19 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-02-20 Pub. Date: 2007-02-19
Image Number: 16165
Caption: Mainstream Media. But --- I sand 'no." Can't I tell you just one more thing about Anna Nicole … NO!
     
348. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-02-15 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-02-18 Pub. Date: 2007-02-15
Image Number: 16128
Caption: I'm not fired? Firing Frank Blunt is a big blow. He was pursuing all the unkept promises to the people of New Orleans. A real digger, but can't afford him now. But I refuse to abandon the story, Lemont. We're publishing a book collecting all your moving blog posts about Katrina. Congratulations, son. You're an author. I'm not fired?
     
349. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-02-11 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-02-14 Pub. Date: 2007-02-11
Image Number: 16105
Caption: Saw your blog. Great article about eyestrain, Lemont. Thanks, Susan. Eyestrain's an underrated affliction. I miss writing fiction. I miss sending my dreams off to the publishers. Oh yeah? I used to lose myself in the words you created. Oh, yeah. And with people watching TV on their phones, it's only gonna get worse. But it's always "blindness this" or "glaucoma that." But every rejection was like to sadistic fingers snuffing out the sun. Eyestrain is the black sheep of the eye-affliction family. If I just write about today's news and people hate it, it doesn't mean they hate me. It just means they hate the news. You don't say. You're such a wuss. I do say. I know.
     
350. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-02-09 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-02-09 Pub. Date: 2007-02-09
Image Number: 16051
Caption: Oh, him? He's Washington Tymes, the guy who spread rumors that Clinton was a Soviet Spy and Obama want to terrorist school as a kid. What's wrong, Mr. Tymes? (Sniffle) people (sniffle) parroting hurtful rumors about me. Bloggers are saying I'm a right-wing propagandist raised by a deranged cult leader with deep ties to dictators and even organized crime. They're smearing me! Smearing and rumor-mongering is wrong! Wrong! You don't say. Psst! Guess what I heard about bloggers.
     
351. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-02-07 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-02-08 Pub. Date: 2007-02-07
Image Number: 16049
Caption: "Washington Tymes." Hmmm … You seem familiar. I could swear I've met you before. 1988. Psst! Psst! Guess what? Guess what? Someone told me Dukakis is seeing a shrink. 1992. Psst! Guess what? Guess what? Someone told me Bill Clinton might be a Soviet spy! No, I don't think we've met. Yeah, at Taco Bell, 1999. you were telling me Al Gore was nuts.
     
352. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-02-08 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-02-08 Pub. Date: 2007-02-08
Image Number: 16050
Caption: Frankly, Mr. Tymes … Call me "Washington." Frankly, Washington, I don't believe a word you say. Clinton a Russian spy? Obama schooled by terrorists? I mean. Really. All that stuff's been proved wrong. It's crazy talk. I can't take you seriously, Washington. Call me "Mr. Tymes."
     
353. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-02-06 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-02-06 Pub. Date: 2007-02-06
Image Number: 16014
Caption: You're Washington Tymes? You're the guy spreading false rumors about Barack Obama? No, no, you've got it all wrong. I'm not the one implying BARACK OBAMA JOINED AL-QAIDA WHEN HE WAS SIX, I'm merely telling you that a source at the HILLARY CLINTON campaign APPROVED of THIS baseless RUMOR. I'm merely alerting you the Clinton campaign's dirty, dirty tricks.
     
354. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-02-05 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-02-05 Pub. Date: 2007-02-05
Image Number: 16013
Caption: Psst! Psst! Hey, guess what? Guess what? Barack Obama was educated in an America-hating, Al-Qaida-worshipping madrassah as a kid. What? No he wasn't. That's a dumb rumor. He went to a public school and then a Catholic school. Who are you, anyway? I'm Washington Tymes. Say, have you heard the latest about Clinton?
     
355. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-02-03 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-02-03 Pub. Date: 2007-02-03
Image Number: 15979
Caption: In other news, our invasion of America has been called off. Sources say it was all a misunderstanding. Condoleeza Rice actually threatened to attack nations that seek to destabilize Iraq. Ms. Rice persuaded the President that since we destabilized Iraq by accident, a simple "oopsy, my bad" will suffice. Back to our top story: Are the American Idol judges meaner this year?
     
356. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-01-31 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-01-31 Pub. Date: 2007-01-31
Image Number: 15969
Caption: Many officials believe our ongoing occupation of Iraq is destroying that country's government. In keeping with Secretary's Rice's warning of military action against any country destabilizing Iraq, the President has deployed naval forces to Washington, D.C. Will he successfully intimidate himself, or will there be war? But first our top story: The ongoing feud between Donald Trump and Rosie O'Donnell apparently has nothing to do with Britney Spears.
     
357. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-01-16 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-01-16 Pub. Date: 2007-01-16
Image Number: 15793
Caption: In other news, the White House continues to defend the President's recent "signing statement" authorizing himself to open your mail without a warrant if he says it's an emergency. We sent invitations to constitutional experts to discuss the matter on-air, but for some reason we've had no response. This just in: Britney Spears did not do anything stupid today.
     
358. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-01-09 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-01-09 Pub. Date: 2007-01-09
Image Number: 15762
Caption: Notice how we only supposed to speak well of the dead, Big L? Yeah. When Gerald Ford died, the media spoke of his pardoning Nixon as "healing" instead of as Ford saying presidents are above the law. Yeh, an' when James Brown died, almost no one mentioned his troubles wit' the law. What have you done, Clyde/ Someday it won't matter, Dawg.
     
359. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-01-05 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-01-07 Pub. Date: 2007-01-05
Image Number: 15754
Caption: Hello, you've reached the American Embassy in Foreignvania. If you're a reporter calling to ask whether our virtual takeover by the Pentagon is causing any trouble, press "one." If you're a Foreignvanian calling to suggest we're replacing diplomacy in your country with brute force, press "two" and duck. Um, we mean press "two."
     
360. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-12-09 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-12-09 Pub. Date: 2006-12-09
Image Number: 15508
Caption: Clyde, Kramer black folks the n-word is old news. That was three weeks ago. Dawg … you been workin' for the mainstream media two months, an' already you' attention span be all gone. Guess what I just heard about Britney Spears? Focus, son. Focus.
     
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