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261. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-05-28 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-05-28 Pub. Date: 2010-05-28
Image Number: 47785
Caption: Can I get a quote from you for the story, Boss? Fire away, Brown. In retrospect, was letting Behemoth Oil do whatever they wanted in our basement a wise idea? Well, I weighted the pros and cons … The con was possible environmental calamity, which, y'know, that's pretty big. But it turns out a billion dollars weighs a lot.
     
262. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-05-25 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-05-25 Pub. Date: 2010-05-25
Image Number: 47782
Caption: Before you leave, I need you to run down a breaking story. To bring in some extra dough, I let Behemoth Oil build a well in the basement of this very building. Say what? I suspect they weren't exactly diligent when it came to safety. Sir, why didn't you tell me about this earlier? It just now came up.
     
263. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-05-01 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-05-01 Pub. Date: 2010-05-01
Image Number: 46758
Caption: Dear Lemont Brown, We at Save-Them-Childrens often ask celebrities to participate in fundraising ads. You are a well-known blogger for a major newspaper. Can you tell us if the paper's interviewed any celebrities we could approach? No respect AT ALL. Please pass this note on to the real reporters.
     
264. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-04-08 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-04-08 Pub. Date: 2010-04-08
Image Number: 45961
Caption: So now you're the Chronicle's new political humorist? Pretty cool, huh? Yeah! How'd that happen? I'll do it for hot soup and bus fare. The boss sees something special in me.
     
265. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-04-07 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-04-07 Pub. Date: 2010-04-07
Image Number: 45960
Caption: Sir, I noticed you've replaced our political columnists with Mark Twain articles from the year 1900. That's right, Brown. Saves a little money … appeals to older folks … … If it works for our comics page, it can work for our opinion page. "I bring you the stately matron called Christendome ... Give her soap and a towel, but hide the looking-glass." What's that even mean? An extra two months in the black.
     
266. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-04-04 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-04-04 Pub. Date: 2010-04-04
Image Number: 45685
Caption: Dear Moron … I am offended by your latest "blog" where you wrote that you're tired of people being offended about everything. It's very insulting of you to imply that people who take offense do so because they're just oversensitive. The easily offended play a vital role in our society and we're tired of being persecuted and mocked. I believe it was Martin Luther King, Jr. who dreamt of a day when the easily offended could sit at a lunch counter without being disturbed by any inappropriate menu items. Everybody co-opts everything. I demand an apology on behalf of all offended Americans.
     
267. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-03-05 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-03-05 Pub. Date: 2010-03-05
Image Number: 44614
Caption: Mister, you're right. Facebook takes too long. Gag … choke … I'll find 911 on Twitter, "follow" them and wait for them to "follow" me back. Then I can post a tweet. And they'll see it and be here in no time. JUST … CALL … THEM!!! Just WHAT them?
     
268. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-03-04 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-03-04 Pub. Date: 2010-03-04
Image Number: 44613
Caption: Choking … get … 911 … Ok, mister! What … (choke) … you … doing?! Sending 911 a "friend request" on Facebook. Now I have to wait for them to "friend" me back, then I can chat with them. Mister?
     
269. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-02-10 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-02-10 Pub. Date: 2010-02-10
Image Number: 43925
Caption: I have my doubts that you're truly recovering, Lemont. I told you … … I accept that the vampires and demons I've seen all year were all in my head. Nevertheless, I want to try a novel approach. Hypnotism? Shock therapy? Post your delusions to an anonymous twitter account and then watch as all your followers tell you you're insane. Can I see your degree again? Hear me out ...
     
270. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-01-21 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-01-21 Pub. Date: 2010-01-21
Image Number: 43149
Caption: Intensive Care. Hold on, the media reported you were here. This letter came for you today. Dear Lemont Brown, In your book "Katrina's Ghost," you interviewed the ghost of a man who sacrificed his own life to save his wife during Hurricane Katrina. The story touched me more than you could ever imagine, because that man was my husband. And I'll be seeing him soon. Please write back so I can thank you personally. * *Writing back will enroll you in a Feudalbanc Massacard's credit protection program. These people are tricky.
     
271. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-01-16 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-01-16 Pub. Date: 2010-01-16
Image Number: 42962
Caption: Twitter twitter.com/candorville. At Walmart, dude asks if I have a lighter. I reply "Depends. I'll have 2 check your underpants 1st." Turns out not every1 follows the news. Tap tap tap.
     
272. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-01-06 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-01-06 Pub. Date: 2010-01-06
Image Number: 42638
Caption: Fear, Inc. I called you all here because the Fox "News" division is blowing you all out of the water. Figmond Trip, I'm looking at you. Your tea party division especially was a serious disappointment. Sir, I don't think that's fair. I mean, Mr. Armey and Ms. Bachmann had no chance against Fox's O'Reilly and Hannity. I mean, the three-legged race is stacked in their favor. Hannity's inhumanly quick. I suspect steroids, if you wanna know the truth. ... Um, we're not talking about last week's picnic, are we. Sit down, Figmond.
     
273. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-01-05 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-01-05 Pub. Date: 2010-01-05
Image Number: 42637
Caption: Fear, Inc. 2009 turned out to be a banner year for our division. Fox News Channel. In fact, if it weren't for us, the company would've ended the year in the red. Did you say red? You know who really liked the color red? … KARL MARX. Everybody give a round of applause to the 2009 "Salesman of the Year," GLENN BECK! Know who else measured time in years? ... Nazis.
     
274. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-12-26 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-12-26 Pub. Date: 2009-12-26
Image Number: 42237
Caption: Twitter. I heard that, for some unknown reason, the inventor of the hammock never got around to patenting it. Tap tap tap tap tap.
     
275. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-12-24 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-12-24 Pub. Date: 2009-12-24
Image Number: 42235
Caption: Lemont investigates the thousands of murders in Juarez. Lemont Brown, may I introduce you to the infamous La Llorona. La Llorona has haunted this town for hundreds of years, tirelessly stealing the souls of little children. Those empty, soulless kids grow up to become savage killers for the drug cartels. La Llorona, may I introduce you to Lemont Brown. Lemont works for the media. Always nice to meet a colleague. Everyone's a satirist.
     
276. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-12-18 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-12-18 Pub. Date: 2009-12-18
Image Number: 41949
Caption: … So I'm sick and tired of all this talk about Tiger Woods! He's just a guy who can hit a ball with a stick! He has no impact on my life or yours! For the love of God, somebody explain to me why the media thinks I care that Tiger Woods has a couple chicks on the side! Um ... actually, what I asked was, "Are you aware your best friend, Lemont is missing and no one's seen him for weeks?" And I thought the alleged mistress count was up to eight. Nine. ... What?
     
277. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-12-08 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-12-08 Pub. Date: 2009-12-08
Image Number: 41700
Caption: We're back with Lemont Brown, award-winning reporter for the Candorville Chronicle. Before we get back to talking about your new book, I just want to remind you I'm a screeching windbag hate-radio host … … who'll ask what you think about people choosing hate radio and the web over your elitist, dying newspaper industry ... Good to meet you. ... and then I'll taunt you with my latest ratings.
     
278. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-10-25 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-10-25 Pub. Date: 2009-10-25
Image Number: 39862
Caption: It's blank. Look again. See? See what? Too many people let the media do their thinking for them. We tell them when to be outrage, who to trust, what to care about. What to laugh or cry about. It never ends. … Until now. I'm not following. Nature abhors a vacuum. When readers see this empty space where my article should be, they'll fill it with their own opinions, beliefs and conclusions. Eh? ... Eh? You've been trying that one since kindergarten. Stupid deadlines.
     
279. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-09-14 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-09-14 Pub. Date: 2009-09-14
Image Number: 38468
Caption: You have mail. Hi Mr. White, I'm uploading my new column for tomorrow's paper right now! That way you can go home on time for once so you don't continue to alienate your wife and children. Also, in my spare time I baked you a cake. Your pal, Lemont.
     
280. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-09-06 media 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-09-06 Pub. Date: 2009-09-06
Image Number: 38003
Caption: VH1 presents Where are They Now? The Some People Story. It was the mid-2000's. Politicians across the country relied on him. There wasn't a press conference around that didn't broadcast his beaming smile. I sound wise compared to him. And for one brief fearmongering season, the strawman called "some people" was at the top of his game. I've forgotten 9-11. I want to hug terrorists. But as often happens in the cutthroat false argument business, his star began to dim. I want to take your guns. Yawn. And it sent him on a downward spiral. He came into the bar already drunk, talkin' 'bout nobody's scared of him no more and no one takes 'im seriously. Bartender. ... an' I was like "bruh, you're bringin' down the whole room." Very bad tipper, too. But then, in his darkest hour, some people makes a surprising comeback. AFTER THESE MESSAGES...
     
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