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Candorville

Comics about matter and mattering.

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Result page:    2  3  4  5  Next  (98 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-05-02 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-05-02 Pub. Date: 2018-05-02
Image Number: 171054
Caption: How long you think it be till unaccountability trickle down to the rest of us? The Democrats got Debbie Wasserman Shultz' people destroying ballots before they can be recounted. That ain't legal. But nothin' happen to them. The president use his office to make money e'reday. That ain't legal. But nothin' happen to him. What did you do, Clyde? Don't matter. That's my point.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-03-20 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-03-20 Pub. Date: 2018-03-20
Image Number: 169627
Caption: I'm starting to feel like nothing really matters anymore. Dr. Noodle. I remember just ten years ago, I'd spend hours online arguing with random strangers about important things. M.D. We all seemed to take plenty of time back then to listen to each others' points. We'd research our counter-arguments and present them. Sometimes we'd actually change each others' minds. I see. So when you tweeted all that last night, how did people respond? Some said I was being a snowflake, other said that was fake news.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-12-17 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-12-17 Pub. Date: 2017-12-17
Image Number: 165540
Caption: I have to tell you, I'm pretty freaked out by all the Terminator death robots Boston Dynamics has been developing. You too? Of course. Have you seen that Youtube video of their headless wolf-creature murder-bot? About 100 times. Have you seen the humanoid one with a soulless face and wheel-feet that's agile and quick enough to catch you no matter how fast you run? What ... are you scared? Snowflake. What the -- you're the one who brought it all up! Do you have a link proving I brought it up? A "link"? This is real life, not the internet. I heard it! That's my proof.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-11-23 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-11-23 Pub. Date: 2017-11-23
Image Number: 165150
Caption: All right, Sherry, let's meet up after and I'll help you bury it. Pardon me … couldn't help but overhear … It's unnecessary to add "up" after "meet." … And it's as strange as saying "let's dance up," or "let's sleep up." For that matter, what's with people who say "eat up"? Are you trying to catch a beat-down? "Down"? See how arbitrary it is?
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-09-14 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-09-14 Pub. Date: 2017-09-14
Image Number: 162600
Caption: I don't want to be that guy, but … But what? Well … you notice anything about all the old sitcoms they're bringing back? "Full House" … "Will & Grace" … "Roseanne" … "Gilmore Girls" … How come nobody's talking about bringing back "227" … "A Different World" ... "Living Single" ... "Family Matters" ... "Moesha" ... "The Cosby Show" ... Stop trying to change the subject and admit you lost that argument we had two weeks ago. Wait, wait ... scratch "The Cosby Show."
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-09-11 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-09-11 Pub. Date: 2017-09-11
Image Number: 162597
Caption: Remember that video of police attackin' that blond white woman nurse for just doin' her job? Remember Justine Diamond, white woman the police shot in her pajamas? Remember the hundreds of people of all races unnecessarily shot by cops in the past few years? Remember the huge "All Lives Matter" protests that broke out eretime? Glad to see I was wrong about "All Lives Matter" bein' just another way of sayin' "shut up an' take it, n*****." My "Sarcasm Monday" idea really caught on. Look at Wino Larry over there relievin' hisself. What a beautiful sight.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-08-05 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-08-05 Pub. Date: 2017-08-05
Image Number: 161035
Caption: You know what I love more than almost anything in this world, Clyde? … French fries. They're like a tragic, ill-fated romance. No matter how bad they are for me, I just can't stay away. Can I have some of your fries, Clyde? Sorry, bruh, my fries be monogamous.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-07-22 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-07-22 Pub. Date: 2017-07-22
Image Number: 160506
Caption: You know why most political comic strips are leftist? Tell me. Sponsorship. There's no product-placement allowed. So there's no financial incentive to sell out to the big corporations. So political strips are free to talk about how Mansanto loves us. How big pharma over-loves us. How the oil industry is loves us, etc. Because one of those corporate friends can advertise in comic strips. But they advertise in newspapers, right? Doesn't matter. Editors and publishers don't ever read the comics.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-05-27 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-05-27 Pub. Date: 2017-05-27
Image Number: 158345
Caption: I knew it was only a matter of time till you called me, babe. I called you by accident. Call it fate … call it kismet … call it lokomaika'i … Is that Hawaiian for "accident"? It was only a matter of time till you realized that those other women were really no big deal after all. Phil Anders. Listen to me. I. Called. You. By. Accident. I butt-dialed you. Give us a kiss.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-05-03 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-05-03 Pub. Date: 2017-05-03
Image Number: 157547
Caption: Why erebody always say "think of the children"? How'd that get all flipped 'round? When we was kids, no matter what crazy, deranged #@$% we saw, our mommas said "don't mind that, that's grown folk's business." When they all of a sudden decide that grown folks have to all be "Mister Rogers" instead of kids havin' to mind they business? It's apparent you're not a parent. You tell one more "dad joke" an' I won't be held responsible for my actions.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-04-15 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-04-15 Pub. Date: 2017-04-15
Image Number: 156723
Caption: 1982. I don't like going to the doctor. My Uncle Benny went to the doctor and never came back. Plus, there are lots of sick people there. How is it a good ideas to go sit in a waiting room where everyone has the plague? Plus, I believe in the Vulcan philosophy of mind over matter. If Spock could trance himself free of those killer alien spores, I could do that too. You're going to die young, Lemont. No, I'm going to live long and prosper.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-02-15 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-02-15 Pub. Date: 2017-02-15
Image Number: 154534
Caption: The Chronicle wants to hire me back and send me to cover the whole ISIS thing. A few years ago, I'd have jumped at the chance, no matter how dangerous it is over there for journalists, because the truth is more important than me. But now, all I can think of is that my baby boy needs me. I'm his whole world. That makes me more important than anything. Does that make me a responsible parent, or a raging narcissist? A little raging narcissism is a good thing. Ph.D.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-02-06 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-02-06 Pub. Date: 2017-02-06
Image Number: 154237
Caption: I wanted my life to matter. I wanted to cause ripples in the ocean of existence. I wanted to affect people's lives. I wanted to create a legacy. I wanted my feet to make an imprint in the sand. And the only way to do that is this: When someone calls you to work on something larger than you, you answer, no matter who that person is. I still think Trump was just using you as a photo op when he asked you to help solve the homeless problem. Ben Carson and I had a good conversation. I'm sure he'll be calling me again any day now so we can get down to business.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-12-28 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-12-28 Pub. Date: 2016-12-28
Image Number: 152626
Caption: … so they took me off the Trump account. I'm going to take matters into my own hands; I'm going to Trump Tower next week. I said I'm meeting with Donald Trump next week. Aliens. Star Trek. Green Lantern. Are you even listening?! How much do you think apartments go for in Canada?
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-09-04 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-09-04 Pub. Date: 2016-09-04
Image Number: 147443
Caption: Scientists proved quantum entanglement is a thing. They split one subatomic particle into two, and then found that when they did something to one half, the other half was affected too. Meanwhile, they also proved the location of subatomic particles is dependent on observation. Until it's observed, a particle exists in different locations simultaneously. I know. The act of observing it collapses all those locations into one. And no one know why that is. Scientists also believe that every particle in the universe is entangled with every other particle because they were all part of the same singularity that exploded during the big bang. Don't you see, Susan? When we decide to find a particle's position, the particle decides to have one, because that particle is quantum-entangled with us! Ok ... but why'd you ask if I was followed coming here? An observer observing an observer who's observing an observer who observed how observation works just might be what caused the last big bang,
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-08-25 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-08-25 Pub. Date: 2016-08-25
Image Number: 147665
Caption: C-Dog don't never dream 'cause dreamin' just make real life worse, Big L. Let's say I dream I can stand on a corner or walk across the street without some cop bothering me. Then when I wake up, no matter where I go, there some cop lookin' out his car window at me, just waiting for a reason to "put me in my place." If I don't dream things can be better, then I ain't never disappointed. I know what you mean. Last night I dreamt you weren't depressing.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-05-13 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-05-13 Pub. Date: 2016-05-13
Image Number: 143025
Caption: What's the last book you read, Clyde? The Bible. Really? You read the Bible? Of course. The Bible tell us no matter what awful, horrendous, calamitous thing we done, it already forgiven an' forgotten. What did you do? If JESUS don’t remember, why should I? (This cartoon was originally published on 2014-02-28).
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-03-06 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-03-06 Pub. Date: 2016-03-06
Image Number: 139630
Caption: Hi Elmer, election day is almost here! You may remember that we helped you register to vote at a student even at University of Texas at Austin. "Elmer"? This election is the most important election someone in your community has ever faced. Now is your chance to take control for all Antarctic-Americans and really weigh in on the issues you indicated matter most to you ... such as "climate change," "wool sweater importation tariffs," and "penguin-albatross miscegenation." Can we count on you to vote, Mr. Fudd? Bruh, I ain't never been to University of Texas in Austin. Somebody done clowned you with the wrong number. But we gave you a free frisbee. An' what the @#$% I care about "penguin-albatross miscegenation"? Love is love.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-02-28 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-02-28 Pub. Date: 2016-02-28
Image Number: 138939
Caption: You're going to vote for Trump? He a man of action, dawg. Yeah. But what kind of action? What that matter? I'm tired of electin' people who can't get spit done. Do you like what he says he can get done? What that have to do with anything? What do you mean? It has everything to do with everything! If someone wants to accomplish awful things, you shouldn't want him to accomplish them. What if he said he was the only candidate on stage who could successfully build a puppy-melting death ray? Well ... probably can't Hillary build no death ray. She ain't never persuaded nobody to do nothin; noway. That's not the point!!!
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-12-23 matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-12-23 Pub. Date: 2015-12-23
Image Number: 136830
Caption: Your double date gonna go well, bruh, just keep in mind it ain't no competition. I met Susan date already. It don't matter that he taller than you. It don't matter that he richer, stronger, prettier, smarter, an' funnier than you, neither. Maybe I should just stay home. Oh, that's what I forgot. Brotha got a better home than you, too.
     
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