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Candorville

Comics about loves and loving.

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181. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-10-29 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-10-29 Pub. Date: 2011-10-29
Image Number: 67159
Caption: The judge gave you full custody of Lionel?! Yeah! I won! Dios mio, Lemont! I'm so happy for you! I've never won anything in my whole life!!! Of course you have! You have friends who love you, you do what you like to do for a living, and you've got your health. And apparently you don't ever go hungry. Quit while I'm ahead!
     
182. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-10-25 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-10-25 Pub. Date: 2011-10-25
Image Number: 67155
Caption: Closing Arguments. Your honor, there are many reasons to deny my client custody of his son. He's black and poor, the mother's white and rich. He hangs with thugs and nobodies, she hobnobs with the rich and politically connected. But your honor … My client knows all this. And he came here anyway, knowing all his flaws would be exposed and ridiculed! What does that tell you, your honor? That he's an idiot? That he's a moron? That he loves his son that much!
     
183. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-09-23 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-09-23 Pub. Date: 2011-09-23
Image Number: 65729
Caption: So Sasha Mitchell's your best friend, now? I can tell her things I can't tell anyone. Nobody's ever made me feel like that before. Lemont, a "best friend" is someone who's there for you in real life, not on Facebook. Someone who loves you in person, despite all your dorkiness, self-sabotaging, obliviousness, poor financial management and endless nitpicking. Generally speaking, I mean. That's not what dictionary-dot-com says.
     
184. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-09-10 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-09-10 Pub. Date: 2011-09-10
Image Number: 65250
Caption: Remember Webster, from college? Yeah, how could I forget? He was really charming. Sasha Mitchell married him. I'm not surprised. She went after him pretty hard back then. She said when I didn't make a move on her back in college, it broker her heart, so she latched on to him because he was the complete opposite of me. Um ... What I meant to say was, he was so incredibly un-charming. Too late.
     
185. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-09-07 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-09-07 Pub. Date: 2011-09-07
Image Number: 65247
Caption: Sasha, last time we talked you said you weren't happy with your husband. Well … I don't understand why he does what he does. But I'm … content. Oh. I'm kinda sad to see you just being "content." I'd rather see you happy, like I remember you back in college. :-) What's he do? Tap tap. Maybe I could give you a guy's perspective. Facebook messages. From Sasha Mitchell. Well, he goes around ... all the time ... not being you. LB? Sorry, I was just waiting for an LOL, or a J/K, or a ROTFLMAOBIJKSDTIS. Tap tap.
     
186. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-09-06 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-09-06 Pub. Date: 2011-09-06
Image Number: 65246
Caption: I still can't believe you married Webster. How's he doing? Oh, he's good. Tell him I said wassup. Um … I don't think so, LB. He wouldn't like that I'm talking to you. What? Why not? Tap tap tap t - Facebook. Messages. From Sasha Mitchell. He's always thought something went on between us back in freshman year. He remembers how I'd look at you all googly-eyed. That's easily explainable. He also remembers catching you after I hid you in my closet. Tap tap tap tap t -
     
187. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-09-04 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-09-04 Pub. Date: 2011-09-04
Image Number: 64822
Caption: Couples Sessions Today. Dr. Noodle. I"ve been thinking about how you said men are nonverbal communicators. So, lately I've paying to Ebenezer's body language. Go on. His silence, his distance, his late nights at the office, all forced me to realize I cannot fulfill his needs. In opening the door to leave, he let in the light that illuminated all the roaches in our relationahip. Last week, I paused at the door before leaving with the kids, the dog and my luggage. His refusal to even look away from his baseball game so say goodbye told me he was hurting, and couldn't bear to watch. Ebenezer's courage in reaching out to me in nonverbally has made me fall in love with him all over again. Pate, please get me tix for tonight's game. Yes, Ben ... we can get back together. Wait ... we broke up?
     
188. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-09-02 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-09-02 Pub. Date: 2011-09-02
Image Number: 65032
Caption: Lemont calls to cancel his cable. Sir, before you go ... What if I gave you all the channels you want, plus free HBO for a year, for half what we charge you now? I'd say if you can afford to do that, you must've been overcharging me all this time ... but whatever. I'll give you one more chance. I'll take it. Thank you, sir! You won't be sorry. The one who's less in love controls the relationship.
     
189. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-08-11 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-08-11 Pub. Date: 2011-08-11
Image Number: 64169
Caption: Roxanne loves Lionel too. And she's rich. So why does he need me? Simple: I love him and he loves me ... but there's also the big picture, Judge. The social dynamics, set in motion by slavery's destruction of the black family unit ... have created a culture in which generations of black men have grown up estranged from our feathers. "Fathers," I mean. Sorry, I'm not used to saying that word. Objection, the petitioner is being a drama queen.
     
190. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-08-10 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-08-10 Pub. Date: 2011-08-10
Image Number: 64168
Caption: Why should the court grant you custody of your son? Because I love him with all my heart. That's all you said. That's all that matters. How 'bout "I have a great job, I'm ambitious, I'm responsible, I've already planned for his future, and here's all the proof"? That would've been good too.
     
191. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-07-27 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-07-27 Pub. Date: 2011-07-27
Image Number: 63735
Caption: Tyrone, listen closely … there's one secret I've never, EVER told another living soul. The secret is … … that I love building up suspense. STOP THAT.
     
192. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-06-23 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-06-23 Pub. Date: 2011-06-23
Image Number: 62375
Caption: My earliest memories were of the vampires who turned me. "Mommy" and "daddy." They were very cold. Because they didn't hug you, or give you the love and support a young girl needs? Because they were ded. Fascinating.
     
193. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-06-12 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-06-12 Pub. Date: 2011-06-12
Image Number: 61590
Caption: When someone doesn't return your love and devotion, it's normal to assume you should change something about yourself. Oh, you noticed I've lost a few pounds? That has absolutely nothing to do with the face that Kelly hasn't even called me for months. I've lost my appetite for no reason, and I've been working out constantly, to get my mind off nothing in particular. Hmmm ... I see. My friends are awful quiet around me. People don't know what to say to someone who's in denial. No, they probably think I'm getting way too skinny.
     
194. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-06-11 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-06-11 Pub. Date: 2011-06-11
Image Number: 61782
Caption: You're married? And you have five kids? Um … is there something wrong with that? YES! I've been in love with you half my life! You wrote to me after 16 years, at a time when I'm feeling old and alone! We're supposed to fall back in love, get married and live happily ever after! DELETE DELETE DELETE. 'Course not. I'm happy for you.
     
195. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-04-10 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-04-10 Pub. Date: 2011-04-10
Image Number: 59402
Caption: Do you really think Kelly is capable of loving you? Huh? Kelly says all the right things to make you feel she needs you and understands you better than anyone ever could. That she's your "soul mate." She makes you feel alive. That's why you stubbornly ignore all the signs that show she odes not love you. She's using you to fulfill her own need for power and control. That's why every time you show her she's got you, she gets bored or annoyed and stops talking to you. Make no mistake, when she's not talking with you, she's seducing other people. The act of winning a man's unconditional love is the ultimate high, for her. It makes HER feel alive. She'll be back as soon as she tires of them or thinks she's losing you. But i text her every to tell her she's losing me, and she still hasn't come back.
     
196. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-04-03 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-04-03 Pub. Date: 2011-04-03
Image Number: 59018
Caption: Kelly called. She told me she was finally ready to be with me. She asked me to marry her. I told her "No, you've hurt me too much." and I hung up and swore I'd never answer another phone call from her again. She called dozens of times after that. I answered every time. She told me she was sorry for hurting me all year, and said she can't live without me. She was so in love with me. It broke down the wall I'd built around my heart, and I fell back in love with her. I told her I would consider marrying her if she could go six months without breaking my heart again. Then she didn't return any of my calls for two whole months. I swore I would NEVER, EVER answer another phone call from that woman again! Good! Today, she e-mailed me. I answered that because it wasn't a phone call. Fascinating.
     
197. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-03-29 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-03-29 Pub. Date: 2011-03-29
Image Number: 59013
Caption: Facebook. Messages. From Sasha Mitchell. I have a confession to make, Lemont. I don't know if I should tell you. Yes you do. Nobody says "I don't know if I should tell you" unless they already know they WANT the other person to know what it is. It's just a manipulative ploy the insecure use to get the other person to beg for the information, so if the "confession" bugs them, it's THEIR fault, 'cause they ASKED for it. It takes a pretty easily manipulated person to fall for that. Delete delete delete. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, TELL ME ALREADY! Tap tap tap tap. Well ... ok ... but remember, you asked for it ...
     
198. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-03-07 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-03-07 Pub. Date: 2011-03-07
Image Number: 58313
Caption: Dios mio! What? What happened? I completely forgot about your court case. I'm such an awful friend! I don't want you to have to go through that alone. You need moral support. You'll be happy to hear I'm getting it. My long-lost love Sasha Mitchell's been Facebooking me, asking how it's going. What? Why are you glaring at me? Hey, is this one of those "women don't make any sense" moments?
     
199. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-02-26 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-02-26 Pub. Date: 2011-02-26
Image Number: 57547
Caption: Facebook Messages. From Sasha Mitchell. Hey, Lemont. I know you had a big day in court today, I just wanted to see how you're doing . Also, BTW, I had this weird dream last week, on Valentine's Day. Only when I woke up, I realized it was actually a MEMORY. I don't know if I should tell you ... It was Valentine's Day, 1995, around midnight. I was laying on your bed in the dorms just watching you write an article for the school paper. I recall being really happy and feeling rally honored that you let me do that. I had such a crush on you, Lemont. It was SO embarrassing. Lemont, I ... Lemont? Lemont? Are you there? MUST ... NOT ... HIT ... SEND ... It's "lying," not "laying," Sasha. SEND.
     
200. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-02-25 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-02-25 Pub. Date: 2011-02-25
Image Number: 57546
Caption: Finally, as the elderly man you now see before you, Lemont Brown has become the paragon of responsibility. Except for the part about having had a love-child with a woman he doesn't even like, which led to him suing her for custody and us all being here today. I'm not even sure how that one happened, it's so out of character for him. But other than that ... paragon of responsible-ness, all the way. I'm only mumblety-five!
     
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