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Candorville

Comics about loves and loving.

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81. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-05-28 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-05-28 Pub. Date: 2016-05-28
Image Number: 143642
Caption: My son wants "Pajama Diaries" to win "Best Comic Strip" at tonight's awards because he likes pajamas. And with that, I became convinced Donald Trump will be our next president. Don't get me wrong, I love "Pajama Diaries." I'd be thrilled if it won. But I don't love what my son's reasoning says about humanity. We base our choices on highly personal, irrational reasons, and then we rationalize them after the fact. Aren't you being a little hard on a two-year-old? Don't you see? A lot of people vote with their inner two-year-olds.
     
82. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-05-25 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-05-25 Pub. Date: 2016-05-25
Image Number: 143639
Caption: I just watched all the trailers for Fox's new primetime shows. "Making History," "Shots Fired," "Prison Break," "The Exorcist," "Son of Zorn," "Star," "APB" … Some of it looks so good, so unique, so cinematic, so … amazing! I already love it all! Isn't that a good thing, Lemont? No! That means it'll all get canceled.
     
83. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-05-22 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-05-22 Pub. Date: 2016-05-22
Image Number: 143085
Caption: 1984. Do you think Terrence likes me, Lemont? Who's "Terrence"? I don't know any "Terrence." I know a "Turbo," and a "C-dog," and a "Rerun," and a "Big Oatmeal," and a "Greazy." I know a "Night Court," a "Shorty," a "Cheese-face," a "Rocky," and "Airwolf," a "Riptide," a "Boss," a "Voltron," a "Schoolbreak Special," and a "Big Cheeto." In fact, I'm pretty sure if there was a "Terrence" in our class, he'd go to great lengths to make sure none of us ever knew it. You've asked me an unanswerable question, Susan. The fact he told you his name was "Terrence" is either proof he loves you or proof he's trying to push you away. How come you don't have a nickname? The only on I wanted was "Prince," but living up to it would be too much pressure.
     
84. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-05-17 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-05-17 Pub. Date: 2016-05-17
Image Number: 143333
Caption: Prince visits Lemont's dream. I'm not gay, but every time I saw you I thought "Now that's one sexy brother." Even in the eighties, when men were ashamed of thinking things like that. Even then, it didn't feel awkward at all to think that way about you. That's because when you saw me you didn't see the man, you saw pure music. You saw life. Everyone wants to make love to life. That's why it doesn't bother you that you've always wanted to make love to me ... maybe a little awkward.
     
85. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-04-17 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-04-17 Pub. Date: 2016-04-17
Image Number: 141571
Caption: I'm so happy, doc. I think I'm falling madly in love with an Israeli women I met in Turkey. Dr. Noodle. That's interesting. Just last month, you were still in love with Kelly. And the month before that, you were in love with Marie. And two months before that, it was Sharquisha. You're constantly falling in and out of love. Out? Who said anything about "out"? I still love every woman I've ever loved. With all my heart and soul. With the intensity of the big bang itself. You don't like seeing things end, do you? I've Facebook friended everyone I've ever met.
     
86. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-03-06 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-03-06 Pub. Date: 2016-03-06
Image Number: 139630
Caption: Hi Elmer, election day is almost here! You may remember that we helped you register to vote at a student even at University of Texas at Austin. "Elmer"? This election is the most important election someone in your community has ever faced. Now is your chance to take control for all Antarctic-Americans and really weigh in on the issues you indicated matter most to you ... such as "climate change," "wool sweater importation tariffs," and "penguin-albatross miscegenation." Can we count on you to vote, Mr. Fudd? Bruh, I ain't never been to University of Texas in Austin. Somebody done clowned you with the wrong number. But we gave you a free frisbee. An' what the @#$% I care about "penguin-albatross miscegenation"? Love is love.
     
87. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-02-03 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-02-03 Pub. Date: 2016-02-03
Image Number: 138594
Caption: The Double Date. So … you and Lemont seem happy.* *You'd better not be toying with my best friend's emotions. Employees must wash hands. You said … "So … you took my love. That can't be." … Ready to send? Yes. … Wait, what?! No! No, Siri, don't send! Sending. Siri, you @#$%, I will strangle you! You said ... "Listen here, @#$%, I will strangle you. ... Ready to send? Definitely not! No! Sending ...
     
88. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-01-26 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-01-26 Pub. Date: 2016-01-26
Image Number: 138296
Caption: The Double Date. So where's Vancouver, Lemont? I've been dying to meet her. Well … you know how when you fall in love with someone online, and you sort of get so used to texting hours and hours every day that you start to feel like maybe you're better in writing than you ever would be in person? No. Not really. Susan, Vancouver. Vancouver, Susan. I've heard so much about you. Dios mio.
     
89. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-01-24 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-01-24 Pub. Date: 2016-01-24
Image Number: 137727
Caption: I told my wife all about us, Jenny, and she left me. That means we can finally be together, like we wanted. All the things we dreamed about over Facebook can finally come true. We can finally take that long walk along the beach … make love under the night sky on a bed of roses ... dress like big teddy bears and mud-wrestle ... All the beautiful things that we alone dared to dream are finally about to happen, Jenny. No ... this isn't Robert ... No ... this isn't Sam ... Jenny, are you joking with m -- No, this isn't Randy ...
     
90. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-01-03 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-01-03 Pub. Date: 2016-01-03
Image Number: 136827
Caption: I get tired of everything, doc. And I mean EVERYTHING. Dr. Noodle. I used to love classical music, but now I can't stand it. I got tired of my wife and kids, so I left and found a new wife and had new kids. Then I got tired of them and tried going back to the old ones. But there was a new guy there. So I tried going back to the new ones, but they told me to get lost. I got tired of DirectTV so I switched to Dish Network. Let's go back to your wife and kids. Unless you're tired of that topic. I think I'd like to try a new therapist.
     
91. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-12-30 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-12-30 Pub. Date: 2015-12-30
Image Number: 137115
Caption: I'm not in love with my girlfriend anymore. How do I fix that? C-Dog's Incredibly Bad Advice 50¢. Here what you do, bruh: Pretend she ain't your girlfriend. Pretend she the hot single women you first noticed. You mean try to look at her with fresh eyes again? I meant go see other women ... but that could work too.
     
92. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-12-21 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-12-21 Pub. Date: 2015-12-21
Image Number: 136828
Caption: Vancouver said she's down for our double date next week, Susan. That's good. Mr. B said he's looking forward to it too. "Mister B"? You call the guy "Mister B"? What's up with that? He calls me "Miss G." It's just a little thing we do. I wonder if our little things are as disgusting as YOUR little things. We only do that when we're rubbing noses.
     
93. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-12-13 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-12-13 Pub. Date: 2015-12-13
Image Number: 135929
Caption: Lately you've been moody and distant. I keep asking you what's wrong … and you keep saying I'm just imagining it. But I'm not crazy. Whatever it is, you can tell me. I'm your wife. I love you. I'll understand. Don't fall for it. As long as you're totally honest with me, I would respect you and love you and we could work it out, no matter how bad it is. Don't fall for it. Ok (sigh) here goes ... There's someone else.
     
94. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-12-12 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-12-12 Pub. Date: 2015-12-12
Image Number: 136224
Caption: I'm glad you're finally going to meet the guy I've been seeing, Lemont. It's important to me that you like him. I think I'm starting to lean toward being inclined to feeling the preliminary precursor to falling for this guy. You're my bff. I want to know if you see yourself seeing the same things I suspect I may see myself seeing in him. You guys sound seriously close to being serious about maybe getting serious. I wouldn't go that far.
     
95. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-12-11 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-12-11 Pub. Date: 2015-12-11
Image Number: 136223
Caption: I love being inside when it's freezing outside. It makes me feel six years old again, Clyde. It's the same feeling I'd get when I built a fort out of couch cushions. What the -- ? Another stereotype bites the dust. You a grown man, dawg. A real man isn't afraid to be six years old. A real "real man" ain't afraid to put a six-year-old on timeout. Go sit in the corner.
     
96. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-12-08 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-12-08 Pub. Date: 2015-12-08
Image Number: 136220
Caption: I've been talking to this lady in Vancouver. It's going great, but I want to take our relationship to the next level. C-Dog's Incredibly Bad Advice $2. Easy, bruh: Take your lady on a double date. But make sure the other woman in that other couple think you cute. If your girl see the other woman ignorin' her man to look at you, she gonna get mad jealous. How's that a good thing? Ain't nothin' take a relationship to the next level better'n jealousy.
     
97. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-11-10 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-11-10 Pub. Date: 2015-11-10
Image Number: 135007
Caption: I went out with this book agent last week and told him some stories about work. Then he tried to get me to write a novel based on it. Awesome! I've written three, you know. If you need any advice, just come to me. I could walk you through it. Share my expertise. Writing a novel is a long, hard process. Takes about six months to a year. I'll guide you through it, 'cause you're my best friend and I love you. I finished it last week. I hate you with a passion.
     
98. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-11-06 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-11-06 Pub. Date: 2015-11-06
Image Number: 134725
Caption: Hi, this is the Huffington Post. We're wondering if we could republish your recent blog post: "Why You've Stopped Being in Love"? Well, I'd certainly be interested. How much do you guys pay contributors? Oh, I'm sorry. We're unable to pay our bloggers. But our site can offer you a great deal of exposure. Aren't you guys worth over $50 million? $50 million doesn't go as far as it used to.
     
99. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-11-03 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-11-03 Pub. Date: 2015-11-03
Image Number: 134722
Caption: Hello, Tara: I just want to say … I love my son more than life itself. My love will always be with him, no matter what happens. I've lived a long life. Seen many things. Gone many places. I have no regrets. By the way, I'm having a major medical procedure done tomorrow. But if my son doesn't call me before then, no big deal. I just don't want HIM to have regrets. (Hopefully I don't accidentally send this text to him, totally by mistake.) (Sigh) Better call momma. People have been known to die from tooth-cleanings. Just saying.
     
100. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-09-27 love 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-09-27 Pub. Date: 2015-09-27
Image Number: 132520
Caption: When someone says "Black Lives Matter," I respond by saying "All Lives Matter." Because I don't see color. But if you "don't see color," you can't see that young black men are far more likely to be shot unnecessarily by police than men of any other color. And you can't solve a problem if you can't even see it exists. It felt food to stand up for equality. So I didn't stop there. What do you mean? OWS protester love of red velvet cake. Daily Nut Job. Obama wet bed as child, covered it up. Goodnight Grandpa. I came across a "breast cancer survivor" meeting at the rec center. I poked my head in and shouted "All Cancer is Bad." By the looks on their faces, I could tell some of them realized they'd been totally horrible for acting like their cancer was so much more important than other cancers. Also confesses to having red "Little Red Riding Hood." Exoneration. I came across a funeral this morning, and after the eulogy I reminded the family that all people die, and that it's wrong of them to act like this one was more special than the rest of us. Has aversion to pepper spray. Why?
     
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