Here, Dad. Try some of this on your hair next time you shower. What is it? It's a special conditioner for damaged hair. It'll totally revitalize and bring back the luster to your hair. Can I slip a little of that in his oatmeal too?
I think the name you give a pet should reflect the pet's true character. Take Roscoe, for example. "Roscoe" is slang for a revolver or pistol. How does that reflect his true character? Are you kidding? Look at him and tell me he's not hot as a pistol.