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Candorville

Comics about kings.

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1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-07-27 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-07-27 Pub. Date: 2019-07-27
Image Number: 178674
Caption: Boss, I've got a new idea. I think it'll double - no, triple - our sales. Not again. No, hear me out. This one's great. You know how we've been trying to figure out a way to keep customers from going to Coffee King? Yes. We've paid sweatshops in Foreignvania to post negative Yelp reviews ... We've planted rats in their kitchen ... and we've besmirched their name in many ways. Well here's my idea: Why don't we try serving better coffee than them? Where's the fun in that.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-03-21 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-03-21 Pub. Date: 2019-03-21
Image Number: 176838
Caption: Randy, if you could be any animal there is, which one would you be? Easy: I'd be a Bonobo monkey. But not just any Bonobo monkey, I'd be the king of all Bonobo monkeys. They resolve all their conflicts with a little good, old-fashioned, hot, steamy lovin'. They're the best animal to be. DO you agree? Totally, of course. No conflict here.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-03-08 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-03-08 Pub. Date: 2019-03-08
Image Number: 176628
Caption: Daddy, what is six twafficking? Uh … What? Where'd you hear that? You were on the phone talking about six twafficking in Flowida. Oh. Well, you know that you're not supposed to listen to Daddy's door when he's being a journalist. So what's it mean? … It means there are six kings in charge of traffic. Oh.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-12-13 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-12-13 Pub. Date: 2018-12-13
Image Number: 175378
Caption: Come on … You can't blame me for losing the Nat King Cole lawsuit. You're the one who sampled his voice without permission for your album. You're the on who begged me to pretend I was a voice actor you'd hired to impersonate Nat King Cole. It wasn't my idea! I tried to lip sync to that testimony you recorded for me using his voice. I really tried! When you lip sync, ain't no sound s'posed to come out your mouth, fool. You ain't s'posed to harmonize with the recording. I got nervous.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-12-12 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-12-12 Pub. Date: 2018-12-12
Image Number: 175377
Caption: Member how I watch your boy for you? Well, I need a favor too right quick. You want me to watch your pet pigeon? Nah, bruh … I want you to testify that you a voice actor I hired to sound like Nat King Cole, 'cause Nat King Cole people suing me for sampling him in my album. I'll watch your pigeon. All you gotta do is up sync to the testimony I recorded for you usin' Nat King Cole voice.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-12-11 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-12-11 Pub. Date: 2018-12-11
Image Number: 175376
Caption: I just downloaded your Christmas album. Good man. How on earth did you create that obscene rap battle between you and him? I mean, did he actually say those things … or did you hire a voice actor? Computers, bruh. I went through his must an' rearranged vowels an' consonants an' what not. Thank god. I'd hate to think Nat King Cole ever even knew those words. The video was harder to make.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-11-01 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-11-01 Pub. Date: 2018-11-01
Image Number: 174718
Caption: I'll tell you one thing, Susan, this is not the country I thought it was. When we were kids, I thought all the bad, unfair, horrible things were all in the past. I thought Martin Luther King, Jr., the Beatles, Muhammad Ali and Mr. Rogers came along and made it all better. I want my son to have the same tragically wrong illusions. It makes for a happy childhood. I still don't think you should cryogenically freeze him and they him out when all the crazy stops. I'm just researching whether it's possible. I haven't decided.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-06-17 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-06-17 Pub. Date: 2018-06-17
Image Number: 172067
Caption: Why're you reading that … thing? Well, because it's interesting. It's a book of political cartoons. We Eat the Poor. Do you have any idea how important political cartoons are? Political cartoons helped bring down King Louis XVI and Marie Antoinette. And then there's Napoleon ... He was so terrified of cartoonists that he banned them. And when that didn't work, he commissioned cartoons to counterattack his enemies with. Hitler was terrified of cartoons. Nixon put cartoonists on his enemies list. Tyrants all over the world are jailing of killing them. No, I mean why are you reading that flappy think? Don't you have a Kindle or a phone? ... Someone needs to draw a cartoon about you.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-01-13 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-01-13 Pub. Date: 2018-01-13
Image Number: 167094
Caption: I had a dream. I dreamt that in 2020, "The Rock" runs for president as an independent. The Republicans nominate Trump again. Democrats are so overconfident that they nominate the corpse of Woodrow Wilson. And while we're all distracted, Congress quietly eliminates elections altogether and they appoint an immortal A.I. as the chairman and CEO of the American Corporate Empire, LLC. I think I like Martin Luther King's "I have a dream" speech better. I'd tell you the rest, but you might as well just watch "The Matrix."
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-10-22 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-10-22 Pub. Date: 2017-10-22
Image Number: 163428
Caption: Dear "Journalist," your latest article is highly offensive and fake. You attacked those of us who accuse black NFL players of being "ungrateful" when they protest state-sanctioned racism. You said WE were the ungrateful ones. You wrote "You should be grateful to the 'ungrateful black protestors' throughout history, who've always reminded us what this country is supposed to stand for. 'Ungrateful' protestors like Martin Luther King, Jr ... Like Muhammad Ali ... and like Crispus Attucks, the 'ungrateful' black guy whose 'ungrateful' protest in Boston led to him becoming the first man to die in the Revolutionary War." You've totally exaggerated the worth of those so-called "protestors." I'm supposed to think they're heroes just because they got SHOT? First of all, sir, Muhammad Ali never got sh -- Wait ... Donald Trump? Is this you? Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap. I like people who weren't shot.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-09-17 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-09-17 Pub. Date: 2017-09-17
Image Number: 162145
Caption: Want to catch up on "Game of Thrones"? What I wanna watch that for? TV supposed to be an escape. Huh? It's a show set in some medieval world called "Westeros" where they've got knights and dragons and magic. How's that not an "escape"? They got any black people on Westeros? Of course they do. A whole bunch of them ... Well, a couple. What is they on the show? They knights? They kings? Queens? They ride dragons? They make magic happen? Um ... well ... not ex -- You see they work for the one who rides ... and you know one of them isn't a knight, but he's a soldier. Not everything has to be about race, you know. They slaves, ain't they? No. They started as slaves, then, am I right? Wanna watch "Westworld"?
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-05-19 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-05-19 Pub. Date: 2017-05-19
Image Number: 158080
Caption: Tyrone, do you recall the days when we panhandled outside the theater? Of course, Rosencrantz. I remember them vividly. They were performing "King Lear," the Shakespeare play about the angry, vain old king who slowly descended into madness. He carved up the kingdom and gifted it to his children. He gave the largest piece to the daughter who flattered him the most. What happened at the end of the play? I don't know. Why do you ask? Spare change?
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-12-04 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-12-04 Pub. Date: 2016-12-04
Image Number: 151096
Caption: The other day, somebody in a red Trump hat actually to me to "Go back where you came from, n*****." I'm not surprised. That's been happening a lot. Trump's election encouraged white supremacists everywhere to come out of the shadows. They think it's their day again. Well this ain't Selma, an' I ain't Martin Luther the King. That fool found that out right quick, bruh. This ain't 1965. This here 2016. Fools better know "n*****s" be armed now. Oh god, Clyde! What did you do?! What did you do?! You had a gun?! No, I had an iPhone. I recorded the whole thing. Put it on Youtube. In just two hours, that fool got fired. Oh. Maybe we should all be packing iPhones for the next four years.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-12-13 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-12-13 Pub. Date: 2014-12-13
Image Number: 119938
Caption: What's wrong? England found King Richard III's remains under a parking lot. Oh … what's wrong with that? I used to think the world was a lot more exciting, Susan. Whatever happened to sweaty archeologists being chased through catacombs by bad guys, uncovering ancient, booby-trapped tombs ... What happened to the booby traps? Real life's interesting enough, Lemont. A parking lot??
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-07-28 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-07-28 Pub. Date: 2014-07-28
Image Number: 114480
Caption: I think the Palestinians would get a lot further if they were to follow the lead of Gandhi, MLK and Mandela. You mean they should march all up an' down, sing spirituals and get beat upside the head for years? You'd be surprised at how much that can accomplish. Have you EVER cracked open a history book? Have YOU?
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-02-23 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-02-23 Pub. Date: 2014-02-23
Image Number: 107347
Caption: Morrie Turner. Father of diversity on the comics page. Soul Corner. In 1965, Morris "Morrie" Turner became the father of diversity on the comics page when he launched "Wee Pals" … The first syndicated strip featuring black, white, Latino and Asian characters. Morrie became an instrumental part of the civil rights movement after the assassination of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. when over 100 papers added his message of racial harmony to their comics pages. Every Sunday in Wee Pals "Soul Corner," Morrie celebrated African-American historical figures that the history books usually ignored. Proving to little kids everywhere that now matter what we look like, we could grow up to be doctors, scientists, academicians, leaders ... and cartoonists. 1923 - 2014. Morrie Turner.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-11-11 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-11-11 Pub. Date: 2013-11-11
Image Number: 103798
Caption: John 1:48-50 … Nathaniel said to him, "How do you know me?" Jesus answered him … "Before Philip called you, I saw you standing under a fig tree." Nathaniel said, "Rabbi, you are the son of God! You are the king of Israel!" Jesus replied: "Because I said I saw you standing under a fig tree ... ?" You're the only man I know who reads the bible for jokes. (This cartoon originally published on 11/4/2011).
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-09-10 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-09-10 Pub. Date: 2013-09-10
Image Number: 101333
Caption: What do you think of this Syria thing? "Thisseria king"? Who that is? "Syria." It's a place. Is it between 47th Street an' 51st Street? No. Is it by the bus stop, the gentlemen's club, or that alley over that way? The world is bigger than your neighborhood, Clyde. Is it between "not my problem" an' "I don't give a #$%@"?
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-08-14 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-08-14 Pub. Date: 2013-08-14
Image Number: 100291
Caption: Breaking news: The Boston Globe has been sold for $70 million. In more breaking news, The Washington Post has just been sold for $250 million. These sale prices are nowhere near the $1.1 billion a paper like the Globe pulled in just two decades ago. Why is that, Chuck? Well for one thing, "Breaking news" is reported much faster online than in print. Breaking news: a future king has just been born in Britain!
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-03-30 king 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-03-30 Pub. Date: 2013-03-30
Image Number: 95008
Caption: Obama thinks he's a king! He's using executive actions to ram through things congress doesn't want. Thank God for Culture Clash. He delayed the deportation of young illegals! He stopped defending the anti-gay-marriage law! And that's just for starters! He's using executive orders more than any other President in history. Thank God for Culture Clash. Maybe 'cause this is the most filibuster-happy Congress in history. I don't see what that has to do with anything. Thank God for Culture Clash.
     
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