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Candorville

Comics about jumps and jumping.

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Result page:    2  Next  (38 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-06 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-06 Pub. Date: 2019-08-06
Image Number: 178907
Caption: ICE and border patrol are really detaining Americans? Even American children. Back in March, they detained nin-year-old Julia Medina for 36 hours and interrogated her without her parents. She's an American who lives in Tijuana, and she had her passport. They tried to get her 14-year-old brother to say she was his cousin. What? Why? I asked them then they asked me for my passport. So I panicked and jumped into a passing freight train ... But I'll make a follow-up call tomorrow.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-03-06 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-03-06 Pub. Date: 2019-03-06
Image Number: 176626
Caption: Son, Daddy has an important interview tomorrow. I need you to stop jumping. Ok. What do you mean ok? You're still jumping. I did stop jumping. What you see happening wight now is cawwed bouncing. And you let him get away with that? It's important to encourage any skills that could lead to being a lawyer.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-08-24 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-08-24 Pub. Date: 2018-08-24
Image Number: 173658
Caption: After I'd gracefully climbed down from the air duct, I jumped right back into action … I'm a trained investigative journalist. And while I may be mumblety three years old, I've got the stamina of a man twice my age. I summoned all my skills to finally track down one of the refugee children the President had kidnapped from his parents. Mama! Sounds like they trained you very well in journalism school. Not much gets past me. Will humor you for $.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-08-15 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-08-15 Pub. Date: 2018-08-15
Image Number: 173501
Caption: So then I climbed out of the air duct to interview the little refugee. I was four, but now I'm five. It was my birthday. There was something off about his story. Two army men with bayonets put us on a train. We got to ride it for four whole days. Were you scared when they took you from your parents? They didn't. We're all here. We get to stand in line for food together. We get to see the machine guns pointing at us together. Veteran journalist that I am, I didn't jump to any wild conclusions. What year is this? Is this 1942? This is 1942, isn't it. We get to say the pledge of allegiance every day together ...
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-08-09 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-08-09 Pub. Date: 2018-08-09
Image Number: 173376
Caption: twitter. Sassynic: Jumping jacks … have those ever been considered a real exercise? They seem so … fake to me. They're the breast implants of exercises. Candorville: If a caveman saw all the glowing, blinking devices in my room he'd flip out. I'd hate 2 see what he'd do if he saw my bills for all of them. I don't understand, what's this have to do with you deciding you no longer need counseling? I'm cured! All the voices in my head have been crowded out by all the voices in my phone.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-07-22 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-07-22 Pub. Date: 2018-07-22
Image Number: 172923
Caption: Dear "Critic," I read your article about how Star Trek gets its own impulse drive all wrong. You said that even though Star Trek SAYS it's not faster than light, it HAS to be, because of all the times they said they had to leave the star system before jumping to warp speed. Sigh ... not again ... Impulse drive is not faster than light!!! you're a two-dimensional thinker. Has it occurred to you they could leave a star system by flying UP, out of the ecliptic plane? Moron!!! Dear reader, light passing Jupiter would take 250 minutes to reach Neptune. But in the season finale of Star Trek: Discovery, they start a conversation as they're passing Jupiter, end it ten seconds later as they're passing Neptune ... Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap t - ... at which point the captain says Have we left the Sol system? The navigator says yes, and the captain says Take us to warp ... I rest my case. I was wrong. I was wrong. Just once let someone restore my faith in humanity by just admitting they were wrong. Discovery isn't REAL Star Trek.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-06-03 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-06-03 Pub. Date: 2018-06-03
Image Number: 171757
Caption: What's wrong wit' you, Big L? Nothing makes sense anymore. In Star Trek, they almost never jump warp speed until they've left a star system. It takes light from the sun about eight minutes to reach earth. It takes 5.3 hours for that same sunlight to reach Pluto. And yet, it only takes the Enterprise one minute or so to leave a star system. Don't you see ... Every time they use their impulse drive to leave a star system they're still traveling faster than light. But they're not yet warping space. That means they should be affected by time dilation. For every second that passes for them, weeks or months should pass back on earth. Just like e'ry second of this conversation for you be like months for me. Exactly! Even you can understand that!
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-05-16 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-05-16 Pub. Date: 2018-05-16
Image Number: 171503
Caption: I just invested in Rudycoin. You invested in whaty-what? It's a new cryptocurrency. I missed out on Bitcoin and Ethereum and all the rest, so I jumped on this one. It's good to diversify one's portfolio. Since when you had a portfolio, Big L? You ain't got no portfolio. Do too. Most you got is a manila envelope.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-01-18 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-01-18 Pub. Date: 2018-01-18
Image Number: 167358
Caption: This C-Dog. Whachoo want, fool? Clyde, it's me, Lemont. I just wanna say thanks for watching Lionel for me tonight. Just an FYI: I'm potty training him, so please don't put a diaper on him till bedtime. Also, he's refusing to use the potty, so he may jump up and run around the house in mid-poop. Why you ain't tell me all this BEFORE I agreed to watch him?! No reason. (Originally published on 2015-12-31)
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-01-12 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-01-12 Pub. Date: 2018-01-12
Image Number: 167093
Caption: Son, you're almost three. Three-year-olds don't jump on their beds. I'm not jumping, daddy. I'm flying … Carry on.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-12-24 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-12-24 Pub. Date: 2017-12-24
Image Number: 165815
Caption: Why are we here, Michael? First, doc, thank you for seeing me on Christmas Eve. Dr. Noodle. I'm having a crisis. There we were, sitting around the crackling fire, eggnog in hand. We were roasting chestnuts over the open fire. We were singing carols. We'd opened several of the gifts already. That's when the owners came home early. We jumped out the window but I'm pretty sure Vic left his crowbar behind. I see. So you want to know if turning yourself in would make you feel better? I want you to tell anyone who asks, the therapy sessions began at 4 a.m.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-02-15 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-02-15 Pub. Date: 2017-02-15
Image Number: 154534
Caption: The Chronicle wants to hire me back and send me to cover the whole ISIS thing. A few years ago, I'd have jumped at the chance, no matter how dangerous it is over there for journalists, because the truth is more important than me. But now, all I can think of is that my baby boy needs me. I'm his whole world. That makes me more important than anything. Does that make me a responsible parent, or a raging narcissist? A little raging narcissism is a good thing. Ph.D.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-07-03 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-07-03 Pub. Date: 2016-07-03
Image Number: 144620
Caption: Whutsis? This is your wake-up call. I know you dreamt of this era ever since you were six, but, let's face it: You're tired of superhero movies. Saywhat now? Your inner child was thrilled, but now he's bored. It's like Disneyland. Asdghmplp. Yes. Remember when you were six ... remember how excited you were at Disneyland at 8am, but howl by 10pm the sight of someone in a Mickey Mouse costume made you feel homicidal? Admit it: If you see one more person in a colorful muscly costume running and jumping, your popcorn is going to taste like misery and tears. Never!!! I'll never tire of zzzzzzzz.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-04-24 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-04-24 Pub. Date: 2016-04-24
Image Number: 141854
Caption: What's wrong wit' you, Big L? Nothing makes sense anymore. In Star Trek, they almost never jump to warp speed until they've left a star system. It takes light from the sun about eight minutes to reach earth. It takes 5.3 hours for that same sunlight to reach Pluto. And yet, it only takes the Enterprise one minute or so to leave a star system. Don't you see ... every time they use their impulse drive to leave a star system, they're still traveling faster than light. But they're not yet warping space. That means they should be affected by time dilation. For every second that passes for them, weeks or months should pass back on earth. Just like e'ry second of this conversation for you be like months for me. Exactly! Even you can understand that!
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-02-18 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-02-18 Pub. Date: 2016-02-18
Image Number: 139237
Caption: Hi, cutie. Hi back, "Vancouver." You recognized my voice! Of course I did. It's the only voice that makes my heart jump straight up into my throat. Aw, you're sweet. I was afraid you'd forgotten my voice, since we usually only text. I'm just calling to let you know about a wonderful new app that can make your voice sound like someone else's ... WHO is this?
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-02-14 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-02-14 Pub. Date: 2016-02-14
Image Number: 138656
Caption: I put spyware on my son's computer. Last night, I saw what he's been looking at. Now I feel so guilty. He was watching dozens of Youtube videos detailing the theory that Jar Jar Binks was actually the most powerful evil Jedi in all of "Star Wars." I watched them all. They showed clips from the prequels where Jar Jar was clearly using the Jedi mind trick to manipulate everyone around him. Isaac Asimov was a huge "Star Wars" inspiration. These videos pointed out how Binks is eerily similar to a deceptively buffoonish character named "The Mule" in Asimov's "Foundation" series. It's undeniable. Jar Jar was the real "Phantom Menace," and Lucas must've abandoned that whole idea when we all jumped down his throat about the character. So ... you feel guilty for spying on your child since he wasn't doing anything wrong? I feel guilty for giving George Lucas such a hard time about Phantom Menace. The man was a genius.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-12-31 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-12-31 Pub. Date: 2015-12-31
Image Number: 137116
Caption: This C-Dog. Whachoo want, fool? Clyde, it's me, Lemont. I just wanna say thanks for watching Lionel for me tonight. Just an FYI: I'm potty training him, so please don't put a diaper on him till bedtime. Also, he's refusing to use the potty, so he may jump up and run around the house in mid-poop. Why you ain't tell me all this BEFORE I agreed to watch him?! No reason.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-09-24 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-09-24 Pub. Date: 2015-09-24
Image Number: 132815
Caption: You can jump five more times, or you can jump six more times before going to sleep. It's up to you. How many more times do you want to jump? Five or six? Five-oh-thix. "506" was not one of the options, son. Uh-huh, daddy. You thed it. One! … Two! … Fwee! ... Eight! ... Ten! ... Fouw! ... Eleven! ... This is going to be a long night.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-06-08 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-06-08 Pub. Date: 2015-06-08
Image Number: 128067
Caption: A cop in Cleveland jumped onto the hood of a car after a long chase … and fired 49 times at the unarmed people in the car. It all started when the driver fled from a traffic stop … and then his car back fired as it drove past police headquarters. Cops mistook that for gunfire. That's why when I'm in a car an' it backfires, I dive out the window, an' tuck and roll. A brutha can't take no chances. I always wondered why you do that.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-06-04 jump 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-06-04 Pub. Date: 2015-06-04
Image Number: 127778
Caption: Would I be a bad father if I just went to sleep and let Lionel jump on his bed all night long? Dr. Noodle. Of course not. There's a slight chance that would lead to a cycle of permissiveness … … And that he'll grow up spoiled and feeling entitled, to the point where he'll become a narcissist and turn to a life of crime. Just kidding. Maybe. Can I see your credentials again? Ph.D. (This cartoon was originally published on 2013-05-23).
     
Result page:    2  Next  (38 images)