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Candorville

Comics about homes and homing.

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161. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-09-11 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-09-11 Pub. Date: 2010-09-11
Image Number: 51719
Caption: Hey, Clyde. Just got home from my trip. And I noticed my computer and my TV are gone. Do you know anything about that? Big L, why would -- OH NO! LOOK AT THAT! IS THAT A DISTRACTION?! What?! Where?!
     
162. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-09-06 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-09-06 Pub. Date: 2010-09-06
Image Number: 51714
Caption: How was your flight home, Lemont? Great! Really? But when you called from the airport, you were griping about how they charge $50 for each bag you check. Pfft! I got around that, easy. I'm just big-boned.
     
163. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-08-28 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-08-28 Pub. Date: 2010-08-28
Image Number: 51241
Caption: Hello wrong number, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. The person you're trying to reach cannot come to the phone because he or she does not live here. Please call back and inexplicably ask for the same wrong person a couple more times, hoping for a different answer. Beep. Tyrone? That you?
     
164. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-08-27 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-08-27 Pub. Date: 2010-08-27
Image Number: 51240
Caption: Cathy. I love you, Mom! I don't know why I get so defensive and crazy around you. I know, sweetie. I clipped some newspaper stories on the subject! Here are some magazine articles! Pamphlets from the drugstore! Coupons for … !@$%, you throw one more piece of paper at me, I'ma put yo @$* in a rest home and never visit you. CUT! Take 37. What! Tha's how it REALLY go down, knottamean? I can't work like this.
     
165. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-07-10 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-07-10 Pub. Date: 2010-07-10
Image Number: 49260
Caption: This is Lemont. I'm not here, please leave a message. BEEP. Hey Lemont, it's you calling! You forgot to pay one of your bills, but I don’t remember which one. When you get home, figure out which one it -- Click. Click. Click.
     
166. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-07-03 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-07-03 Pub. Date: 2010-07-03
Image Number: 49075
Caption: Hello creditor, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. I can't come to the phone right now because I'm out make late payments all over the place. Please pretend to not be ecstatic that you get to charge me a late fee at the sound of the beep. Beep.
     
167. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-06-10 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-06-10 Pub. Date: 2010-06-10
Image Number: 48211
Caption: This is not at all what I mean by "house-sit for me."
     
168. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-06-04 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-06-04 Pub. Date: 2010-06-04
Image Number: 48016
Caption: Hello, Mom, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. I can't come to the phone right now because I'm out buying clean underwear, in case I get into an accident. HELLO! THIS IS 97 FM! If you'd answered, you'd have won $100,000!
     
169. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-06-01 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-06-01 Pub. Date: 2010-06-01
Image Number: 48013
Caption: Hello, Mom, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. I can't come to the phone because I'm flying to Walnut Creek to give a big speech and forgot to invite you. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I need someone to pinch my cheeks while I work.
     
170. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-05-31 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-05-31 Pub. Date: 2010-05-31
Image Number: 48012
Caption: Hello, Mom, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. I can't come to the phone right now because I'm out doing who knows what with who knows whom. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I learn to be considerate.
     
171. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-05-08 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-05-08 Pub. Date: 2010-05-08
Image Number: 47015
Caption: Hello, Mom, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. I can't come to the phone right now because I'm out mismanaging my money and letting deadbeats take advantage of my naïve and generous nature. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you when the manipulative people in my life all say it's ok. Beep.
     
172. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-04-22 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-04-22 Pub. Date: 2010-04-22
Image Number: 46585
Caption: Ok … What was the Civil War about, if not slavery? You don't really want to know; you're just patronizing me. Fine, don't tell me! Well since you asked … It was about people defending their homes against an oppressive, distant government. … That wanted to abolish slavery. Minor detail. YOU SEE WHAT I'M WORKING WITH?!
     
173. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-04-10 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-04-10 Pub. Date: 2010-04-10
Image Number: 45963
Caption: Dear boss, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. I can't come to the phone right now because I'm enthusiastically performing whatever useless busy-work you gave me to do. Leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I stop banging my head against the wall. Beep.
     
174. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-03-20 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-03-20 Pub. Date: 2010-03-20
Image Number: 45149
Caption: Hello, Mom, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. I can't come to the phone right now because I went back to school and I'm busy getting whatever certificate or degree you think I should be getting instead of wasting my life chasing my dream. Please leave a message at the beep, and I'll call you back to let you know when and where I'll be graduating. BEEP.
     
175. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-01-30 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-01-30 Pub. Date: 2010-01-30
Image Number: 43366
Caption: Hello, Mom, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. I can't come to the phone right now because I'm being a selfish, no-good ingrate who never goes out of his way to contact the people who love him. Leave a message at the sound of the beep, and I'll get back to you when I've learned to value the people in my life. Beep.
     
176. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-01-07 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-01-07 Pub. Date: 2010-01-07
Image Number: 42639
Caption: At the ad agency, Susan meets with Fox "News" … "Why won't you people (hic) lishun ta me?" The Crazy Guy in an Alley Show. Itsh very simple: gays want to fight in the armArmy. You know who hash arms? Alligators. Alligatorsh live in Florida. Cuba is near Florida. Florida is home to Cape Kennedy! Clearly, John F. Kennedy was behind the gay conshpiracy to convert our alligators to Communishm. I don't think I can sell this. We have to top "Glenn Beck" somehow. Am i the only one who sees this, pePeople?
     
177. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-12-29 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-12-29 Pub. Date: 2009-12-29
Image Number: 42483
Caption: You're a writer. I'll use terms you'll understand to prove you're hallucinating all this. Ever heard of the concept of the "Hero's Journey"? Of course. The protagonist gets thrust into a hopeless abyss of danger against his will, but a wise dude gives him the tools to overcome his challenges. He finds peace, obtains his goals, and returns home a hero. See. You've constructed a hero's journey in your head for yourself. The hopeless abyss: you're stuck in Mexico. You've got the wise guide ... Don't flatter yourself.
     
178. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-12-14 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-12-14 Pub. Date: 2009-12-14
Image Number: 41945
Caption: Hello, you've reached the home of Susan Garcia. You know what to do. Beep. Hi Susan, it's Tiger. Listen, my wife found your number on my cell and she … uh … might be calling you. And the girl who claims to be my mistress found your number too. And the other girl. And the other one. Number four didn't find your number, but she found your picture and might be out looking for you. Number five found your number. Number six may have ... beep. Time allotted for message has been exceeded.
     
179. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-12-05 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-12-05 Pub. Date: 2009-12-05
Image Number: 41434
Caption: (a) No, I hadn't heard the recession was over, and (b) your house is on my foot.
     
180. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-11-19 home 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-11-19 Pub. Date: 2009-11-19
Image Number: 40988
Caption: Golly gee! Lemont Brown, here! You sure you ain't C-Dog? Boy howdy, of course not! 'cause I’m here at C-Dog's house to bust his head for making my sister miserable, but he fled like a little punk. Your number's on his speed-dial, "Lemont." Well gosh, I don't know where C-Dog went. He certainly isn't hiding in my house while I'm away, pretending to be me. What? Nanoo nanoo, live long and prosper and other nerdy @#$%. Gotta go. Goodbye. Click.
     
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