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Candorville

Comics about holds ups and holding up.

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Result page:    2  Next  (31 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-11-24 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-11-24 Pub. Date: 2019-11-24
Image Number: 180470
Caption: This just in: President Trump outraged the world today when he … hold on … We interrupt this story with breaking news … The President pulls troops out of Syria, abandoning the Kurds who fought on our beha -- We interrupt this story with breaking news … The President withheld military aid from Ukraine until they would agree to investigate the President's political rival, Jo -- Hold on ... We interrupt this story with breaking news ... the President seemed to advocate ethnic cleansing today, when he said -- hold one ... We interrupt this story with breaking news ... the colors ... pretty colors are talking to me. Can you hear? This just in: Trying to keep up with every one of the president's scandals may drive a @#$ crazy ... What?! This just in: (huff huff) producers and security are chasing a news anchor through the (huff huff) hallway. Click.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-07-28 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-07-28 Pub. Date: 2019-07-28
Image Number: 178668
Caption: You got some money I could hold right quick? My boy Tashif Sheefy McFly Turner got arrested in Detroit, bruh. I don't know, Clyde … What'd they arrest this guy for? He was painting a mural the city hired him to paint. Naturally, the cops arrested him for vandalism. A city official came down an' told the cops what was up. So all of a sudden they arrested him for somethin' else: resisting, obstructing ... havin' a outstanding traffic ticket ... Geez ... All right, I just sent you money. I think it's great you want to bail him out. Boop boop. Bail who out? He been got out weeks ago. Thanks for the money, though, Big L. Give me back my money!
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-06-01 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-06-01 Pub. Date: 2019-06-01
Image Number: 177798
Caption: There gonna be a whole generation of elbow arthritis. We evolved to be hunters an' gatherers, bruh. Not to hold phones and iPads right up to our faces. You gotta outstretch your arms once in a while, Big L … because that way it's easier for you to see my passwords? Would you rather secure your bank account? Or would you rather end up like this here?
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-11-18 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-11-18 Pub. Date: 2018-11-18
Image Number: 174714
Caption: It all started when I was a tiny kid. My grandpa made me get up on stage at the family reunion and sing. Dr. Noodle. He'd really built me up. Told everyone how great a singer I was. But when I looked out at the crowd of 200 or 300 people who were strangers to me ... I froze. The room was completely quiet and I saw 200 or 300 sets of eyes staring at me. Burrowing into my soul and holding me in contempt. I forgot all the words. I started to cry. And then I wet myself. The first step toward overcoming shyness is crawling out from beneath my couch. Never!!!
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-05-24 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-05-24 Pub. Date: 2018-05-24
Image Number: 171761
Caption: You know what I like best about being a dad? When my little boy curls up in my lap and falls asleep. I hold him tight and know he feels war and safe, and I feel like I can protect him from anything. Even from time. Because as long as he lives, he'll be able to close his eyes and remember this feeling and be two years old again ... hopefully without the wetting himself part. It's important to know when you stop talking.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-05-17 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-05-17 Pub. Date: 2018-05-17
Image Number: 171504
Caption: You really should've invested in Rudycoin, Clyde. My $100 investment shot up to $10,000 overnight. Did you cash that @#$% in, bruh, or let it ride? I think I cashed it in. Whachoomean you think? I saw my balance was $10k/100k Rudybits, and under it there were two buttons. I chose the one that said Rudycash, which seemed more likely to cash in my earnings than the button that said HODL Rudypower. Stop it. I don't know what any of that mean, other than you gonna lose your whole life savings. Stop hodling on to the 20th century.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-04-28 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-04-28 Pub. Date: 2018-04-28
Image Number: 170824
Caption: I told you we should've held on to the cardboard box until the housing market picked back up. Need $ 4 shelter.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-06-15 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-06-15 Pub. Date: 2017-06-15
Image Number: 159154
Caption: Clyde picks up Lemont's son Lionel from daycare. How do I make Brixton not be a buller? Hold on … lemme call your daddy … It's ringin'. Day care. Hello? Yo, Big L, some bully beefin' wit' little man. What you want me to tell 'im to do? The plane crashed at the North Pole! We were rescued by insurgent elves but now they're holding us hostage until the dictator Santa Clause agrees to a ceasefire and two weeks' paid vacation! Send help! got it. Later, bruh. Boop. Your daddy want you to shout a lot of nonsense so the bully think you crazy. I happen to concur.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-04-25 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-04-25 Pub. Date: 2017-04-25
Image Number: 157285
Caption: Susan called 911 on me, Clyde. She was trying to get them to come take me in for a heart attack she thought I was having. But they put her on hold. And after a while, she sort of fell asleep and I sort of snuck away. Whachoomean "sort of," Big L? Ain't no such thing as "sort of." Somethin' either be or be not, bruh. One ambulance ride and one day in the hospital would eat up my whole life savings. Dead people ain't got no life savings, bruh.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-08-19 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-08-19 Pub. Date: 2016-08-19
Image Number: 147389
Caption: What do you think really happened at the end of "Suicide Squad," Clyde? I've watched it about five times now, and I'm still not sure. I thought it was weird that a dude held up some hand puppets an' narrated the last 20 minutes in Chinese. You need to stop watching bootlegs. An' why'd they film "Independence Day" upside down?
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-07-24 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-07-24 Pub. Date: 2016-07-24
Image Number: 145560
Caption: It all started when I was a tiny kid. My grandpa made me get up on stage at the family reunion and sing. Dr. Noodle. He'd really built me up. Told everyone how great a singer I was. But when I looked out at the crowd of 200 or 300 people who were strangers to me ... I froze. The room was completely quiet and I saw 200 or 300 sets of eyes staring at me. Burrowing into my soul and holding me in contempt. I forgot all the words. I started to cry. And then I wet myself. The first step toward overcoming shyness is crawling out from beneath my couch. Never!!!
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-04-01 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-04-01 Pub. Date: 2016-04-01
Image Number: 141137
Caption: You know what I like best about being a dad? When my little boy curls up in my lap and falls asleep. I hold him tight and know he feels warm and safe, and I feel like I can protect him from anything. Even from time. Because as long as he lives, he'll be able to close his eyes and remember this feeling and be two years old again ... hopefully without the wetting himself part. It's important to know when to stop talking.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-10-18 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-10-18 Pub. Date: 2015-10-18
Image Number: 133464
Caption: I never liked Donald Trump. I always thought he was just a blowhard. What are you talking about? You were crazy about Trump. Just last month you were right here, wearing a Trump hat, holding a Trump poster, and reading Trump's book. You told me you'd renamed your goldfish "Donald," and you had colored your hair orange. Newsweak. You said you were picking up "illegals" from in front of Home Depot to help you build a wall around your house. Let's not pretend you weren't totally into Trump. Who is this "Trump" of whom you speak? Stop that.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-08-16 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-08-16 Pub. Date: 2015-08-16
Image Number: 130321
Caption: It all started when my son sat up for the first time. All of a sudden, he didn't need me to prop him up on the couch. And then when he was seven months old, he started crawling. Suddenly he didn't need me to carry him where he wanted to go. Then when he learned to talk at 16 months old, he didn't need me to figure out what would make him happy. He'd tell me. Then when he went to day care at 22 months, he didn't look to me for all his answers. Now he had other grownups to ask. It's like every single day, I become less and less important. Only if you're doing your job right. I was hoping to hold off on the potty training till he was 144 months.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-07-18 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-07-18 Pub. Date: 2015-07-18
Image Number: 129549
Caption: Guess what happened on my date the other day, Lemont. You had a date? I'm so happy for you. Soon you'll have a second date, and a third, and then it'll be a full-blown relationship, complete with hand-holding, imagining what your kids will look like, and awful fights. Then you'll get tired of him and concoct a reason to discard him like a used Kleenex. I'm sorry to hear about your breakup. Some people can know you too well.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-08-31 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-08-31 Pub. Date: 2014-08-31
Image Number: 115090
Caption: I called my ex-wife and told her I forgive her for leaving me for Guillermo Cabonabong. Wow. After five years? Something told me it was time to forgive. Well, I told you back then, holding onto resentment is only going to hurt you. I'm glad my advice finally sunk in. It's not that, doc. Yesterday, Facebook suggested I add Guillermo Cabonabong as a friend. I quit. When even Facebook says it's time to move on, it's time to move on.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-03-14 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-03-14 Pub. Date: 2014-03-14
Image Number: 108531
Caption: What do you think REALLY happened at the end of "Gravity," Clyde? I've watched it about five times now, and I'm still not sure. I thought it was weird that a dude held up some hand puppets an' narrated the last 20 minutes in Chinese. You need to stop watching bootlegs. An' why'd they film "12 Years A Slave" upside down?
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-03-02 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-03-02 Pub. Date: 2014-03-02
Image Number: 107548
Caption: I think having a child has made me a much less self-centered person. Dr. Noodle. I used to diet and hit the gym so I could look great, know what I mean? It was about vanity. But now I eat right and work out 'cause I'm hoping to live long enough to see my baby boy grow up, become a success, start his own family, buy his own home ... That shows a lot of emotional growth. I know. Sometimes when I hold my baby up in the air and gaze into his eyes, I tell him ... "Who's gonna take good care of daddy's affairs someday? YOU are! Who's gonna give daddy a comfortable room in his house when he's ninety? YOU are! ... Although another word for "growth" is "tumor." I take his silence as approbation. PhD.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-12-29 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-12-29 Pub. Date: 2013-12-29
Image Number: 105216
Caption: When I woke up this morning, I felt like a sumo wrestler was holding my whole body down. I posted about it on Facebook, and 17 "friends" "liked" it. The whole experience is making me doubt humanity. No, I know, Susan … You brought me soup and medicine. When if think of "humanity," I don't mean to include you in that. What on earth do you mean by that, Lemont? I'm sick, I don't have to know what I mean by anything. Excuse me, I have something to go "like" on Facebook.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-11-14 hold up 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-11-14 Pub. Date: 2013-11-14
Image Number: 103801
Caption: When I was six, I dreamt I was a Jedi knight saving the galaxy from an evil empire. When I was 16. I dreamt I was making out with the girl next door. Last night, I dreamt I was giving Osama Bin Laden his exit interview, and he didn't like his severance package. Hold up ... you dreamin' 'bout some dude's packages? I bet when I'm 60, I'll dream of ex-lax. (Originally published on 2011-05-16).
     
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