1. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2019-10-15 |
Pub. Date: |
2019-10-15 |
Image Number: |
179942 |
Caption: |
So you dreamed that Anderson Cooper called you a materialistic jerk. It was so real. House of Java.net Cybercafe. This is an outrage! You think? I've been calling you a materialistic jerk for years and it didn't bother you! Hey! You're a @#$% shopaholic boob! Nothing maybe if you get your own tv show.
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2. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2019-09-29 |
Pub. Date: |
2019-09-29 |
Image Number: |
179638 |
Caption: |
Hey loser, see that hybrid outside? It's mine! No way. I got a hybrid before you. It's not fair. I'm so hip, and advanced and superior. And you are a gas-guzzling luddite! Hold it. That's just the set-up. What do you mean? I'm just kidding. That's not my hybrid. Okay. Hybrids are stupid, trendy, loser cars and I'd never own one and you're a loser for wanting one. Hybrid taunt: Got you with the battery and then the gas. Evil genius.
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3. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2019-08-02 |
Pub. Date: |
2019-08-02 |
Image Number: |
178696 |
Caption: |
Lady, why don't you ease up on the taunting. Sure. I'll lighten up so I don't offend the sensibilities of your little girl. He's a boy. Oh, sorry kid. Hope I didn't offend your mother. Hey! Living the dream. Fight, fight!
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4. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2019-08-01 |
Pub. Date: |
2019-08-01 |
Image Number: |
178695 |
Caption: |
Hey pitcher, the only thing uglier than your face is your fastball! Your arm's limper than overcooked linguini! My dead great grandmother could hit that curveball! I love sports.
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5. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2019-07-29 |
Pub. Date: |
2019-07-29 |
Image Number: |
178692 |
Caption: |
As you know, I dislike you immensely. Right back at you. However … Wait! If you're going to say something nice or ask me for a favor, I want to record it for posterity. @#$% ubiquitous technology. Hey! Say what you want about me, but no the phone.
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6. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2019-07-19 |
Pub. Date: |
2019-07-19 |
Image Number: |
178591 |
Caption: |
Welcome all to the monthly gathering of Tightwads United. Hi there. Hello. Hey. On tonight's agenda: Dumpster diving, coupon clipping, and a special lecture. How to carpool while always getting the other person to drive. I'm like a god. Woohoo!! Yeah!!! Clap clap clap clap clap clap clap. Tightwads United.
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7. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2019-05-13 |
Pub. Date: |
2019-05-13 |
Image Number: |
177632 |
Caption: |
Hey wannabe Steve Jobs, get me a coffee. In a sec. What? I'm live blogging my job. I'm writing a moment-by-moment account of the day and uploading it in real time to the web. Preparing for a massacre. Charming customer.
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8. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2019-04-12 |
Pub. Date: |
2019-04-12 |
Image Number: |
177157 |
Caption: |
This café isn't the same without Sadie. I thought she annoyed you. I just did a market analysis and it turns out that her aggravating temperment entertains our patrons. That old wind bag is good for business. Until she gets well, I'm testing replacements. Hey loser, you stink like my armpit! Yawn.
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9. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2019-04-08 |
Pub. Date: |
2019-04-08 |
Image Number: |
177153 |
Caption: |
Hey, loser! What do you want? I need a ride to the doctor to get my test results. You just called me a loser. You're an even bigger loser if you don't help out an old lady. I'm a genius. Evil genius.
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10. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2019-03-02 |
Pub. Date: |
2019-03-02 |
Image Number: |
176514 |
Caption: |
Randy, you're going to represent Rudy in our private relationship matter? I've been retained. That's outrageous. He can speak for himself. He has. By choosing me as his representative. So you're his stand-in. Well, what if I feel like giving Rudy a big kiss right now? Hey! What's good for the goose, baby. I may lower my fee.
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11. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2018-12-14 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-12-14 |
Image Number: |
175401 |
Caption: |
Hey, baby, you're cute. I was wondering if I could not have your cellphone number. Huh? You don't want my number? I'd hate to become one of the many interruptions that makes your day more stressful. If I need you, I'll just softly call your name. If you're too busy or don't hear, don't worry about it. I don't know why, but I am desperately in love with you. It's your hair. It's got to be the hair.
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12. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2018-12-13 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-12-13 |
Image Number: |
175400 |
Caption: |
Randy "The Rock" Taylor's new unified theory of picking up chicks: You've got 20 seconds to get her attention before an email, text, phone call or tweet interrupts. Hey babe. I've got huge biceps, a sweet hybrid with fold-down seats and an iTunes collection with the year's hottest smoochin' music. Beep! Hold that thought. I've got an incoming call. Interesting. Make that fifteen seconds! Pardon? Were you talking? Wait, incoming text.
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13. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2018-08-04 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-08-04 |
Image Number: |
173262 |
Caption: |
Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, What do you think of younger men? -kl. *(Actual reader letter) Ask Sadie at rudy@rudypark.com. Depends. Younger men have strong jaws and rock-hard abs, but they're missing the sexiest thing: they're not crotchety jerks, set in their ways, willing to argue about anything and say totally stupid things. Hey, doesn't that foul old wretch realize I've got rock-hard abs and a steel jaw?! (This cartoon was originally published on 2014-07-12)
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14. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2018-07-22 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-07-22 |
Image Number: |
172979 |
Caption: |
The Adventures of … Damsel-Saving. Recession Man! Wake up, there's a distress call. Oh brother … Hey, Recession man! There's a damsel in distress. It's not you. It's me. What? I'm working through some things. I'm feeling confined … I need space … my parents got divorced ... I never made any promises. Someone needs help, not a long-term commitment. I need alone time. Try Batman.
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15. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2018-05-04 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-05-04 |
Image Number: |
171062 |
Caption: |
Hey little buddy, the pizza delivery guy's out there in the café looking for you. I told him where I was … please … please tell me you didn't order a pizza and tell them to deliver it to the men's room. Please tell me that. The bathroom is not a sanctuary. Ask him how badly he wants his tip.
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16. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2018-04-30 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-04-30 |
Image Number: |
171058 |
Caption: |
Hey boss, mind if I give the 3-day-old muffins to Homeless Harry instead of throwing them out? Are you insane? Do you have any idea how many people are becoming homeless and moving into the alley every day? Three years ago it was just Homeless Harry. But now it's also Wandering Wanda, Displaced Daryl, Desolate Davina, Forlorn Farzad, Dispossessed Dale, Outcast Oswald, Derelect Daphne, Exiled Evan, Refugee Rachel, Itinerant Irving, and Vagabond Vernon. Tomorrow it could be Yomeless You, you know. Yomeless isn't a word, so that's not possible.
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17. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2018-03-10 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-03-10 |
Image Number: |
169200 |
Caption: |
Hey boss, it's almost the middle of March and I haven't been paid yet. Are you sure? Perhaps I already paid you for March back in February. Perhaps I've been paying you a whole month early for the last 16 years, and so you aren't actually entitled to another check until April. If you show me your very first check stub from 16 years ago, we could clear this up. Very. Mad. Man.
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18. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2018-03-09 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-03-09 |
Image Number: |
169199 |
Caption: |
Hey boss, it's almost the middle of March and I haven't been paid yet. Are you sure? Perhaps I already paid you for March back in February. Perhaps I've been paying you a whole month early for the last 16 years, and so you aren't actually entitled to another check until April. If you show me your very first check stub from 16 years ago, we could clear this up. Very. Mad. Man.
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19. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2018-03-05 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-03-05 |
Image Number: |
169195 |
Caption: |
Hey, little buddy. Did you know that men often confuse a heart attack with a bout of constipation. Go away, Randy! That's why so many men who croak from heart attacks are found in the loo. Go away! The first responders are on their way. I haven't been in here that long!
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20. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Rudy Park |
Viewable Date: |
2017-12-27 |
Pub. Date: |
2017-12-27 |
Image Number: |
166541 |
Caption: |
Where were you the last few days, little buddy? San Francisco. I heard new robot security guards were harassing the homeless to keep them from sleeping on city streets. So I went out there hoping to be recruited by any time-traveler who came back in time to lead a resistance cell. I knew it was a long-shot. But I'd have kicked myself if I didn't go and the time-traveler did show up. Hey, nothing ventured, nothing gained.
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