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Candorville

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121. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-07-30 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-07-30 Pub. Date: 2007-07-30
Image Number: 18084
Caption: Hey bro, wanna be friends? Huh? Do I know you? No. Do we have anything in common? Dunno. Wanna be friends? (sigh) Well, I guess-- Cool! Thanks for the add. You'll probably never hear from me again. @#$% Myspace Generation. Got a photo of you I can put in my wallet?
     
122. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-07-16 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-07-16 Pub. Date: 2007-07-16
Image Number: 17937
Caption: Hey Brown, did you see my article about those journalists who gave political donations? It's unethical. It's a conflict of interest. How can the public trust us if we seem beholden to special interests? Was that article above the Microsoft ad or the Exxon ad? Exxon.
     
123. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-06-23 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-06-23 Pub. Date: 2007-06-23
Image Number: 17673
Caption: Dear Susan, watching the sunset, just realized I can e-mail from my phone. Cool, huh? Can watch sunset on roof and write people about every detail as it's happening. Hey, Lemont, that IS cool. Tell me about the sunset.
     
124. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-06-22 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-06-22 Pub. Date: 2007-06-22
Image Number: 17672
Caption: Pardon, sir, I take English test for citizenship. Do I answer review questions correct? Hmm… Well, first off, "jeece" is not plural for "juice." But is not "geese" plural for "goose"? Hey, what can I tell you, pal? English language is just cruel trick played on foreigners and childreners. "Children."
     
125. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-05-07 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-05-07 Pub. Date: 2007-05-07
Image Number: 17174
Caption: Don't eat the donut! Huh? Oh, hey, future me. How's it going? Hold that thought. Just lemme inject myself with insulin to stave off a deadly diabetic coma. So what you're saying is, "Don't eat the donut." If you don't want it, can I have it?
     
126. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-03-23 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-03-23 Pub. Date: 2007-03-23
Image Number: 16517
Caption: Hey, Susan. I just made an amazing discovery. I posted it on my blog. Read it right now. How? Well, I was trying to explain to some bigot on the 'net that "black brains" are not smaller than "white brains," when it hit me… The internet's not a network of interconnected computers at all... It's a temporal portal through which we can have discussions with people from 1807. Click. Hello?
     
127. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-02-28 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-03-11 Pub. Date: 2007-02-28
Image Number: 16387
Caption: Meanwhile across town, Susan Garcia meets with a new client. I need some PR help, girl. I need somethin' that says "Yeh, I hate gay people and I said they shouldn't exist in the world… "…but hey, it was a long night. I was tired. I'm buying a condo on this one. "...and who doesn't turn into a raving bigot when he's tired?"
     
128. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-03-10 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-03-10 Pub. Date: 2007-03-10
Image Number: 16333
Caption: 1992 Sale! Democrat Bill Clinton cheated on his wife. Hey, his personal life's none of our business. Of course it is! We can't elect such an immoral person! Sale! 2007 Republican Rudy Giuliani married his own cousin. Hey, his personal life's none of our business.
     
129. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-02-05 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-02-05 Pub. Date: 2007-02-05
Image Number: 16013
Caption: Psst! Psst! Hey, guess what? Guess what? Barack Obama was educated in an America-hating, Al-Qaida-worshipping madrassah as a kid. What? No he wasn't. That's a dumb rumor. He went to a public school and then a Catholic school. Who are you, anyway? I'm Washington Tymes. Say, have you heard the latest about Clinton?
     
130. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-01-03 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-01-07 Pub. Date: 2007-01-03
Image Number: 15752
Caption: Y'know what you need? You need to get yo' groove on. I'll fix you up with a dude I know. Clyde, I'd rather read "War and Peace" backward than go out with a dude you know. (Sigh) I'd rather watch "The Love Boat" backward than go out with a dude you know. Oh. Hey!
     
131. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-12-22 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-12-22 Pub. Date: 2006-12-22
Image Number: 15617
Caption: Hey Clyde, did you see the newest video someone posted on Youtube? I don't wanna talk about it. Woulda been funny if it didn't trivialize a very real problem. Some surveillance cam caught a wannabe thug trying to get to help him look tough. The loser keeps yelling "police-brutality me please!" Oh man, I couldn't believe it. Shut up. Shut up! Then he starts crying when they drive away.
     
132. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-11-25 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-11-25 Pub. Date: 2006-11-25
Image Number: 15342
Caption: Man, Clyde. I'm having major problems with Dick Fink, my assistant. Have you tried loaning me $2? Good talk, Clyde. Hey, if you don't want the C-Dog's advice, don't ask.
     
133. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-11-07 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-11-08 Pub. Date: 2006-11-07
Image Number: 15189
Caption: Liebold. Dear Heavenly Father, I your humble servant, am running for Mayor. No matter who people vote for, these electronic voting machines will say I've won. Heavenly father, if what I'm doing is wrong, please give me a sign. Any sign. Any sign but that one, Heavenly Father. Hey! Hey!
     
134. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-10-01 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-10-02 Pub. Date: 2006-10-01
Image Number: 14840
Caption: You ever feel like you're in a rut, Clyde? Y'know, like you do the same thing every day an' nothing ever really changes? Hey buddy, I know exactly how you feel. I was the same way. Here is what you do: Just do thing differently each day. And the world seems a little bit brighter. Life the other week at work, they usually kill me -- Coincidentally whenever the President or his party needs a quick bump in the polls, but this time, they merely arrested me. It was a real change of pace, and I finally had time to finish that Ferrigno biography. Clyde, meet Al Qaida's #2 man in Iraq. Al Qaida's #2 man in Iraq, meet Clyde. I seen you befo'. whatup, family? Like Ferrigno, I am not always a nice man when angry.
     
135. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-09-27 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-09-27 Pub. Date: 2006-09-27
Image Number: 14789
Caption: So how are you planning on marketing your CD, Clyde? Oh, the usual way … I'ma hang out in that alley over that way with the CD's in a hefty bag. When bruthas pass by, I'm gonna get all up in they face an' say "Hey! You like rap?" They say "Yeah," an I'm like "Yo, buy this CD, punk!" Sounds like a winning plan. If they say "No," I ask why they wanna keep a brutha down.
     
136. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-08-20 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-09-05 Pub. Date: 2006-08-20
Image Number: 14473
Caption: In Vitro Fertilization Clinic Surplus Embryos I sure am glad the president keeps us safe from the scientists. I feel you, dawg. I mean, sure, extracting our stem cells for experiments could lead to cures for Parkinson's, Diabetes, cancer -- all sorts of agonizing diseases that ruin millions of lives every year. Yadda yadda yadda... But it's just... y'know... wrong. Yeah, dawg. Wrong! Bush values us. Bush saved us from that horrible fate. I wonder what happens now? Will we be born? Grow up? Fall in love? See the sunsets? Swim in the sea? Hey, brutha, hold up. Don't jinx it, now! Oh, I can't wait! Life! Glorious, glorious life awaits us! Nuts. If I had arms and legs, I'd whup yo' @*#, punk.
     
137. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-07-29 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-07-29 Pub. Date: 2006-07-29
Image Number: 14288
Caption: Hey, Lemont, what're you doing? I'm just sitting here googling myself, Susan. Y'know, you can go blind if you do that too much. If you stare at the computer too much it can wreck your vision. Excuse me?
     
138. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-06-07 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-06-08 Pub. Date: 2006-06-07
Image Number: 13935
Caption: Congressman Jefferson? I'm Lemont Brown, with the Candorville Courier. I didn't take bribes. The FBI videotaped you from several angles taking a $100,000 bribe. They later found most of that money in your freezer. I don't think so. Hey, are you the same congressman who used the National Guard to rescue stuff from your house while people were drowning during Hurricane Katrina? Hurricane what?
     
139. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-05-24 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-05-24 Pub. Date: 2006-05-24
Image Number: 13792
Caption: Hey Susan, I--- Hold on a sec, pal. You got a pencil? Mine broke. Sure, here you go. Thanks. Don't mention it. So, anyway, like I was saying, I think our government is way out of control. "Way … out … of … control."
     
140. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-04-09 hey 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-04-10 Pub. Date: 2006-04-09
Image Number: 13426
Caption: Welcome to the Sunday morning political show. Today's hot topic: the spread of nuclear weapons. Representing the contention that this is a bad thing. We have President Bush from March 2006. They're in violation of the nuclear nonproliferation treaty. There's going to be consequences, if you know what I mean, Bob. And here to represent the other side of the debate, we have President Bush from two days later. Thanks, Bob. Let's take India. F'Rinstance, they didn't sign the nuclear nonproliferation treaty, so hey, no problem. In fact, I just told them we'd look the other way if they wanna build more nukes! Bob, I seem to be sending the world mixed messages. No I'm not.
     
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