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Candorville

Comics about things that are forever .

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Result page:    2  3  Next  (50 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-23 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-23 Pub. Date: 2019-08-23
Image Number: 179097
Caption: Seems like we may be headed for a recession. Is now a good time to get out of the stock market? C-Dog's incredibly bad advice $2. Nah, bruh, now the time to put half your money in McDonald's an' KFC an' let it ride. In hard times, people be double-fisting that comfort food, Big L. Recessions don't last forever, though. That's why you put the other half into 48-Hour Fitness.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-07-14 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-07-14 Pub. Date: 2019-07-14
Image Number: 178556
Caption: According to Elon Musk, time travel is possible. I can't wait to time-travel. Elon Musk said time travel is possible? Well, not in so many words. He said it's almost a certainty that we're living in a simulation being run by our descendants in the distant future. His reasoning makes sense. In just my lifetime, we went from "Pac-Man" to "The Sims," where Sims live, work, fall in love, have kids ... and in a few decades, the Sims will be artificially intelligent and they'll actually believe they're experiencing all that. If we're artificially intelligent Sims, then anything is possible. What time travel to be possible? Just wait for the Great Programmer to install the "time travel" expansion pack. Want to live forever? Get him to install the "immortality" expansion pack. According to Elon Musk, I'm one expansion pack away from being a billionaire playboy. Nothing doing. the Great Programmer exhausted all his "miracle" expansion packs 2,000 years ago. But he's still got some "delusion" expansions. (This cartoon was originally published on 2016-07-10).
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-01-09 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-01-09 Pub. Date: 2019-01-09
Image Number: 175738
Caption: The universe is expanding so fast that in one trillion years, all evidence of the Big Bang will have disappeared from view. Oh wow. About 600 million years from now, earth will experience its very last solar eclipse. In less than 100 million years Saturn's rings will be gone. It's amazing that we live at exactly the right time to witness these things. That's a beautiful point, Lemont. You should stop there. In just one year, Game of Thrones will be over forever.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-11-28 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-11-28 Pub. Date: 2018-11-28
Image Number: 175156
Caption: You're on The Ask Sadie Show. What's your problem?! I'm conflicted about the year 2050. In 2050, we'll have several technologies that could let us live forever. No one born after around 1970 might ever have to die. Excellent question. It reminds me of the time a narcissistic caller called someone born way before 1970, just to say he won't have to die, but she will. I will find you and take you with me. Might be for the best. If there is an afterlife, I wouldn't want to miss out on it.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-11-27 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-11-27 Pub. Date: 2018-11-27
Image Number: 175155
Caption: Think about it: In the year 2050, we'll be able to 3-D print replacement organs. In 2050, we'll be able to reverse the aging of our cells. In 2050, we'll be able to transfer our minds to the cloud, live forever in a virtual world, or inhabit androids to live forever in the physical world. After the year 2050, no one in our generation might ever have to die. I like it when you're optimistic, Lemont. With my luck, I'll get hit by a bus in 2049.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-10-26 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-10-26 Pub. Date: 2018-10-26
Image Number: 174604
Caption: 'Sup, Big L?* *We now have more years behind us than we have ahead of us. What's up, Clyde?* *Yeah. I used to feel I'd have time to see everything there was to see 'cause I was going to live forever. Cough cough?* *I'm not ready to grow old, Lemont. Yawn* *I don't know how to cope with it either.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-08-20 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-08-20 Pub. Date: 2018-08-20
Image Number: 173654
Caption: Susan … Did you just check your watch? Whaaaat? Noooo. 'Course not. I'm telling you about how I tried to interview a tiny child in one of the President's baby-refugee jails … and you're checking your watch. Well just how long do you expect someone to be able to stay outraged about something like that? Forever. That's too tiring! How tired do you think those babies' parents are?
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-06-04 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-06-04 Pub. Date: 2018-06-04
Image Number: 172068
Caption: Has it occurred to you, Rosencrantz, that we are never there? Wherever we are at any given moment is but a rest stop on a journey form where we were to where we are headed. All of existence is in motion. Sometimes I wonder what would happen if some great being would put its finger on existence and bring it to a halt. Even the great finger could not remain there forever, for the finger is always on a journey to somewhere else. I sense this thesis is about to go sideways, Tyrone.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-03-18 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-03-18 Pub. Date: 2018-03-18
Image Number: 168967
Caption: Every time there's a huge massacre, the anti-massacre snowflakes try to take away my arsenal. Don't they know what country they're in? This country was founded on guns. The laws that forbid the carrying of arms … disarm only those who are neither inclined nor determined to commit crimes ... Such laws make things worse for the assaulted and better for the assailants ... for an unarmed man may be attacked with greater confidence than an armed man. - Thomas Jefferson. Thomas Jefferson never said that. And even if he had, you'd be resting your argument on the opinion of a slave owner. There they go playing the slavery card again. Well, you have to admit, if a guy thinks it's ok to treat people like property, that guy's judgment is suspect. That part of his judgment only applied to back then. The gun part applies to right now and forever ... because reasons. You know what he thought it was ok to do with his slaves?
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-12-06 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-12-06 Pub. Date: 2017-12-06
Image Number: 165705
Caption: Of course they gon' kill net neutrality, Big L. So what we won't be able to visit any site we want to online anymore. Nothin' good last forever, bruh. It's like that old Doctor Zeus book said … Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened. I don't think Doctor Seuss meant we should apply that to our freedom. Freedom just an illusion, bruh, like parking tickets.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-10-07 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-10-07 Pub. Date: 2017-10-07
Image Number: 163375
Caption: You know the best part of having a child, Clyde? Less frustration. Maybe we won't cure death in my lifetime. Maybe I'll never be rich. Maybe I'll never walk on Mars. But there's a chance my son will live forever. Maybe my son will strike it rich. Maybe my son will someday set foot on another world. Maybe my son will have a friend who pays back the $2 he owes him. Maybe you so won't be passive-aggressive.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-12-06 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-12-06 Pub. Date: 2016-12-06
Image Number: 151814
Caption: It's been a while since I've seen you two. How are you love birds doing? Dr. Noodle. Couples' counseling. Three years ago. Great. Just great. I mean, sure, we were on the verge of breaking up. And sure, the internet is young and hot, and willing to do just about anything I want ... but tv and I have been together forever, so we might as well just stick it out. Oh. So I'm just a habit to you?
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-08-12 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-08-12 Pub. Date: 2016-08-12
Image Number: 147069
Caption: What's wrong, Lemont? I decided to show my son the same cartoons I saw as a kid. So I Youtubed "Casper the Friendly Ghost." He liked it, but all I could think about was "Hey … that's a dead kid who's not allowed to go to heaven … He's condemned to roam the earth forever, trying in vain to make friends. And every time he fails, he tries to off himself." So those stories were fine for you but not for your kid? So then we watched the Smurfs, and I was like, "This is a caste system!"
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-04-30 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-04-30 Pub. Date: 2016-04-30
Image Number: 142414
Caption: Why do I keep a journal of my son's firsts? Because they're precious moments. Why they "precious"? … Because they happen once and then they're gone forever, living only in a parent's memories. Is they still precious if they ALSO live on in your hard drive, the NSA files and Edward Snowman's briefcase? First time I've ever heard Clyde be so deep. Yeah. I wish I'd recorded that. You ain't never learnin'. (This cartoon was originally published on 2014-04-02).
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-10-13 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-10-13 Pub. Date: 2015-10-13
Image Number: 133793
Caption: It's been a while since I've seen you two. How are you lovebirds doing? Dr. Noodle. Couple's counseling Great. Just great. I mean, sure, we were on the verge of breaking up. And sure, the internet is young and hot, and willing to do just about anything I want ... But TV and I have been together forever, so we might as well just stick it out. Oh. So I'm just a habit to you?
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-05-21 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-05-21 Pub. Date: 2015-05-21
Image Number: 127174
Caption: Erethang come an' go, Big L. Ain't nothin' forever. Good looks come an' go. Youth come an' go. Money come an' go. In the end, we all - every last one of us - be left with none of that. I'll say it again. Do you have my wallet, Clyde? All y'all wanna do is fight the inevitable.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-11-13 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-11-13 Pub. Date: 2014-11-13
Image Number: 118789
Caption: According to Zeno's Paradox, you and I would be immortal, Rosencrantz. If life is a journey toward death, then to arrive at that destination we'd first have to travel half a life. Then half our remaining life, and so on; infinitely forever. But you're overlooking one crucial flaw in that theory. What flaw is that? Zeno's dead. (Published originally on March 29, 2012.)
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-10-07 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-10-07 Pub. Date: 2014-10-07
Image Number: 117063
Caption: Clyde, would you want to live forever? Nah, dawg, that'd ruin erethang. We all go through life with one goal: to live just long enough to outlive erebody who know about all the bad @$%# we done, and then it's like none of that @$#% ever happened. All of a sudden I feel less warm and fuzzy about all the times you've asked me how I'm doing. How you feelin', bruh?
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-10-06 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-10-06 Pub. Date: 2014-10-06
Image Number: 117062
Caption: If we could live forever, I think that would put an end to violence. Really? Yeah. Most violence is just a symptom of out short time-horizon. We only have a few decades to live, so we're all desperate to get what we can while we can. Did you know some turtles are practically immortal? Turtles? When's the last time you saw a turtle launch a cruise missile at anyone. Dios mio. And turtle drive-by's are almost unheard of.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-07-12 forever 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-07-12 Pub. Date: 2014-07-12
Image Number: 113449
Caption: How come you're so sure UFO's exist? Well … we've been seeing them forever. The first known recorded instance I know of is Alexander the Great. He wrote two silver "flying shields" kept diving out of the sky, attacking his army. Did you get that from the internet? Of course not. Of course.
     
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