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Candorville

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121. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-03-26 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-03-26 Pub. Date: 2014-03-26
Image Number: 109224
Caption: We've invaded dozens of sovereign nations. Everywhere from Mexico to Cuba to Iraq. So it IS kinda strange that we're getting so bent out of shape about Russia doing the same thing. No it ain't. Anytime a thug wanna feel like he a good person, all he have to do is condemn some other thug. Wasn't that your thesis statement in kindergarten? It's still relevant.
     
122. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-03-09 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-03-09 Pub. Date: 2014-03-09
Image Number: 107838
Caption: I'm tired of the way you write about me on your blog, Big L. You sensationalize me. You accentuate my most extreme personality traits. You don’t capture the richness, the three-dimensionality of C-Dog. I'm like the URKEL in the story of your life. I didn't know you felt that way, Clyde. I'll stop writing about you. ... Even though my latest poll showed that you're by far the most popular character on the blog. How popular we talkin'? Does it matter?
     
123. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-03-01 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-03-01 Pub. Date: 2014-03-01
Image Number: 107986
Caption: Hello, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. I can't come to the phone right now because the caller ID says "blocked ID," and I'm annoyed with the fact that you know who I am, but I don’t know who you are. Please leave a message and I'll call you back when I feel like talking to someone who like to have other people at a disadvantage.
     
124. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-02-10 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-02-10 Pub. Date: 2014-02-10
Image Number: 107413
Caption: Clay Aiken runnin' fo' Congress. Can you beleedat? What gonna happen next, Ruben Studdard runnin' for secretary of the fence? I don’t know 'bout you, Big L, but I don’t wanna see Kelly Clarkson givin' a state of reunion address. On second though, may I don't feel like talking politics. Make up your mind.
     
125. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-02-04 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-02-04 Pub. Date: 2014-02-04
Image Number: 106773
Caption: What are your symptoms, Mr. Dogg? Emptiness, hollowness … Lack of appetite … Loss of interest in stuff I used to like … … An jus' today I felt somethin' I ain't never felt before. I actually … well … this is completely confidential, right? Yes. I … I actually cared what someone thought of me. We'll run some tests.
     
126. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-01-31 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-01-31 Pub. Date: 2014-01-31
Image Number: 106770
Caption: I feel sorry for the middle name. What? You've got your last name, which is the revered and responsible eldest child. Then you've got your first name, which is quirky and full of personality. But no one remembers the middle name exists until it plummets into an orgy of self-hatred and robs a bank. You had me ... and then lost me.
     
127. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-12-29 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-12-29 Pub. Date: 2013-12-29
Image Number: 105216
Caption: When I woke up this morning, I felt like a sumo wrestler was holding my whole body down. I posted about it on Facebook, and 17 "friends" "liked" it. The whole experience is making me doubt humanity. No, I know, Susan … You brought me soup and medicine. When if think of "humanity," I don't mean to include you in that. What on earth do you mean by that, Lemont? I'm sick, I don't have to know what I mean by anything. Excuse me, I have something to go "like" on Facebook.
     
128. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-12-22 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-12-22 Pub. Date: 2013-12-22
Image Number: 104853
Caption: Sup, Big L. How your family be doin'? Oh my God … Bus. Clyde … Do you feel any sudden numbness? Maybe some weakness in your face, arm or leg? Especially on one side of your body? Are you having any trouble walking? Huh? What the @#!$ is you talkin' 'bout, Big L? Clyde, you NEVER express any interest in the well-being of others ... So when you asked about my family ... Naturally I assumed you'd had a stroke. I have been feelin' sleepy at night. That a symptom?
     
129. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-12-11 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-12-11 Pub. Date: 2013-12-11
Image Number: 104849
Caption: Yesterday I was joking around with Clyde, and I called his momma a "horse." Right away, I felt guilty. Women are human beings, not barn animals. So my joke was kind of sexist. It's not your fault, Lemont. You can't help it. ALL men are pigs.
     
130. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-12-08 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-12-08 Pub. Date: 2013-12-08
Image Number: 104376
Caption: "Stupid arguments" are the most important. But a parking spot? Dr. Noodle. Yes. She yelled at me for two hours! She felt belittled. If a parking spot is within ten feet of a hydrant, it's not a spot! It's a ticket-trap! She doesn’t understand these things! I parked right across the street, where I was more comfortable. What's wrong with that?! When you told her "that's not a spot," she heard "you're a woman, you don't know what you're talking about. Well tell her to use the English-to-English dictionary, not the English-to-history-of-gender-inequality dictionary.
     
131. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-10-11 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-10-11 Pub. Date: 2013-10-11
Image Number: 102500
Caption: Republicans in the House seem to think if they don’t like somethin', they don’t have to pay the bills. Thug 4 Life. It's just like when my man Wesley Snipes refused to pay his taxes. I think Wesley Snipes should be Speaker of the House. Thank God For Culture Clash. I don't wanna see John Boehner be Blade, though, so I'ma have to deliberate on this some more. I feel dumber for having heard all that.
     
132. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-10-09 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-10-09 Pub. Date: 2013-10-09
Image Number: 102498
Caption: How'd you feel when the government shut down. Excited. Say what? It's different. It's like when there's a big wreck on the freeway. It's awful, it's tragic. But at the same time, it's invigorating because it's out of the ordinary. We feel bad, but we're all secretly excited, because it reminds us we're living on the edge. This, right here, is why I never ask you for a ride.
     
133. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-09-25 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-09-25 Pub. Date: 2013-09-25
Image Number: 101944
Caption: Hi, momma. No, I didn’t know that about cousin Cletus. He calls his mom that many times a day? … No, I didn’t know that. Well maybe that's 'cause his mom doesn’t make him feel guilty by telling him all the great things his cousin does for his mom. … Wait ... What do you mean "there's no reason for Cletus to worry about that. Do Not Lean On Door.
     
134. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-09-17 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-09-17 Pub. Date: 2013-09-17
Image Number: 101655
Caption: Sup?* Sup?** *How are you doing, my friend? **Well … Thug 4 Life. (Yawn)* *Not too good. I'm feeling … Lonely. (Ahem)* *You don’t have to feel lonely. I'm here. (Cough)* *Where's the $2 you own me? (Snort)** **Solitude is underrated.
     
135. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-09-04 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-09-04 Pub. Date: 2013-09-04
Image Number: 101089
Caption: Heavenly Father, I feel the need to deliver word about the evils of twerking. But I can't find anything about it in the Scriptures. So I'm thinking of just illustrating the point myself, by twerking during the singing of the Hymns. Reverend of the Year 2000. Hey ... I didn't even ask you to give me a sign yet.
     
136. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-08-30 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-08-30 Pub. Date: 2013-08-30
Image Number: 100805
Caption: I've been stopped and frisked eight times. Three of those times, the cop held a gun to my head. One of those times I had to lie face-down in the dirt. Mayor Bloomberg said it's the price I have to pay to make Americans feel safe. Aren't you an American? Only when it's time to pay taxes.
     
137. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-07-26 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-07-26 Pub. Date: 2013-07-26
Image Number: 99563
Caption: Didn’t you say we had to get going, Tyrone? That was then, Rosencrantz. In the intervening moments, inertia has set in. Idleness. Sloth. Lethargy. Torpidity. Can you feel it, Rosencrantz? The dull comfort of lethargy, draped over us … Soft and fluffy like a child's blanky. We'll get going tomorrow, I'm sure. Read me a story, Rosencrantz.
     
138. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-05-31 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-05-31 Pub. Date: 2013-05-31
Image Number: 97403
Caption: The guys change the channel. Can I say something? What is it? Well, judge … Yes, my pitbull ate her car … But that's not the whole story. Thug 4 Life. She didn’t have to come zooming around the corner. Everyone knows the proper way to round a corner where a pitbull lives is slowly, after honking twice. But your honor, she should've had her pitbull on a leash. He's already unfairly maligned ... A leash would make Killer feel even worse.
     
139. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-05-28 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-05-28 Pub. Date: 2013-05-28
Image Number: 97400
Caption: The guys watch "The Maury Show." Brian, Linda accuses you of being the father of her baby. That ain't true, Maury. Yeah, I have 29 other kids, but I ain't claimin' one that ain't mine … … Because I have INTEGRITY. It's like I can feel my synapses just giving up. He do make a good point. Thug 4 Life.
     
140. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-05-24 feel 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-05-24 Pub. Date: 2013-05-24
Image Number: 97124
Caption: I've been feeling kind of isolated lately. Dr. Noodle. It's like the more Facebook friends I get, the fewer real friends I have. I'm starting to feel like people who don’t really know me know me better than people who know me well. Does that make sense? Mind if I write a paper about you? Ph.D.
     
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