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The Exist Comic Strips

gathered from over thirty leading newspaper comic strips.

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1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-15 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-15 Pub. Date: 2019-08-15
Image Number: 178997
Caption: Let me get this straight: You have a moral objection to covering birth-control pills, even though it's often prescribed for medical reasons. I shouldn't have to pay so that women can have sex without facing any consequences. But you don't have a problem covering Viagra and vasectomies ... even though Viagra only exists so that men can have sex, and vasectomies only exist so that men can have sex without consequences. That's different. men are supposed to sow their wild oats. Women aren't. Who do you think they're sowing oats with?!
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-01 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-01 Pub. Date: 2019-08-01
Image Number: 178784
Caption: You're on Ask Sadie. What's your problem?! Brexit. I'm old enough to remember before the European Union existed. I witnesses its creation. It was historic. But now it's falling apart and if it does, well then what I witnessed wasn't all that historic after all. Way to make it all about you. It's like it was all just one big tease.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-07-18 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-07-18 Pub. Date: 2019-07-18
Image Number: 178562
Caption: Candorville.com says we discovered tons of microbes living deep inside the earth. You know what this means? Scientists are pretty sure both Venus and Mars were habitable a long time ago. If microbes ever existed on either planet, then it's almost guaranteed they're still alive there, deep inside the earth ... I mean, deep inside the Venus. And the Mars. Hey, if we get to call dirt by our planet's name, so do those alien microbes ... and so the advocacy begins. That's your earthier privilege talking.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-04-05 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-04-05 Pub. Date: 2019-04-05
Image Number: 177046
Caption: Looks like the President's finally going to destroy Obamacare. Millions would lose their insurance. Millions more would be thrown of Medicaid. Tens of thousands will die because they won't be covered anymore. On the bright side, I'll be able to tell all my old "pre-existing conditions" jokes again. They do say laughter keep you healthy.
     
5. Comic Strip Brian Crane  Pickles 2019-01-07 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2019-01-07 Pub. Date: 2019-01-07
Image Number: 175612
Caption: Earl, what are you doing? Why am I here? For what purpose? There must be a reason. Are you talking about the meaning of existence or the nature of reality? No, I'm wondering why I came into the kitchen.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-12-27 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-12-27 Pub. Date: 2018-12-27
Image Number: 175594
Caption: You'll note that we phrase your celebrity endorsements very carefully, and you should not deviate from script. Like when you advertise for Milt Johnson & Sons, your favorite name in outer space real estate. Be careful to say it's the only name you'd consider when acquiring property rights on a distant or as-of-yet undiscovered plant but didn't mention that such rights may not exist. It insults a listener's intelligence. I want a house on Pandora. @#$%
     
7. Comic Strip Signe Wilkinson  Family Tree 2011-02-05 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Signe Wilkinson
Comic/Cartoon: Family Tree
Viewable Date: 2018-11-26 Pub. Date: 2011-02-05
Image Number: 56885
Caption: Cheer up, Twigster. Hmmppff … So someone told Ryan Beardsley that you have a crush on him. I'm mortified, It's all good, Twig. Now he knows you exist! Hmmppff …
     
8. Comic Strip Sam Hurt  Queen of the Universe 1990-05-12 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Sam Hurt
Comic/Cartoon: Queen of the Universe
Viewable Date: 2018-11-20 Pub. Date: 1990-05-12
Image Number: 31843
Caption: Dairy. I miss being a kid sometimes. - Living in that intricate realm of imagination where anything can exist…Like a hood ornament on a shopping cart.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-11-12 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-11-12 Pub. Date: 2018-11-12
Image Number: 174935
Caption: Existence is cruel, Rosencrantz. And that is because of the nature of energy. Energy can neither be created nor destroyed, so it must be stolen. For one creature to gain it, another creature or a plant must lose it and perish. To birth a star system and all its worlds ... a nebula must die. For a man to gain the good side of the sidewalk crack, his partner must lose it. Give it back. Your quarrel is not with me, Rosencrantz. It is with existence itself.
     
10. Comic Strip Bob Thaves Tom Thaves  Frank and Ernest 2018-10-25 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Bob Thaves Tom Thaves
Comic/Cartoon: Frank and Ernest
Viewable Date: 2018-10-25 Pub. Date: 2018-10-25
Image Number: 174673
Caption: It's the only stalk in the entire field. The unicorn does exist!
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-09-23 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-09-23 Pub. Date: 2018-09-23
Image Number: 173981
Caption: Hello, you've reached the Breakeezy warranty department. This is Ryan. How may I hinder you? Hi Ryan. I called last week to tell you the water dispenser on my Breakeezy refrigerator was stuck and pouring water all over my floor. I'd just bought a $400 extended warranty a month earlier. you sent out a repairman, and he fixed it. Then he sent me a bill for $200. He said you told him the repair wasn't covered by my policy! That's right. The fine print clearly states that we don't cover pre-existing problems. It broke a month after I bought the warranty! After!!! That's not pre-existing! The fine print's fine print clearly states that quantum theory suggests time may flow in both directions.
     
12. Comic Strip Brian Crane  Pickles 2018-09-13 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2018-09-13 Pub. Date: 2018-09-13
Image Number: 173913
Caption: I wish my mom had used sunscreen on me when I was a youngster. Back then no one used sunscreen. I don't think it even existed. I had a lot of blistering sunburns. They really aged my skin and made me look much older than I really am. Wow. How old are you really? Twenty-six, give or take.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-09-02 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-09-02 Pub. Date: 2018-09-02
Image Number: 173653
Caption: I read your latest article about the Fermi Paradox. It's the likeliest explanation … We've only been transmitting radio signals for about 100 years, Susan. And since radio waves travel at the speed of light, our radio bubble's only about 200 light years across. Our radio waves have only reaches 15,000 or so stars out of 400 billion. It'll be tends of thousands of years before most of the galaxy ever sees I Love Lucy. There could be 399,999,985,000 stars out there with civilizations broadcasting I Love Splorg or something, and we won't even notice it until the year 201818 ... and if most aliens skipped radio and went straight to internet, we may never, ever know they exist. Is that why your headline was We'll Never See a Splorg Get Trolled on Facesplorg?
     
14. Comic Strip John Deering  Strange Brew 2007-12-10 exist 
Cartoonist(s): John Deering
Comic/Cartoon: Strange Brew
Viewable Date: 2018-08-21 Pub. Date: 2007-12-10
Image Number: 20688
Caption: Captain…we seem to be in a "mud hole". The only existing episode of "Star Truck"
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-05-07 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-05-07 Pub. Date: 2018-05-07
Image Number: 171289
Caption: How do we know we're the first advanced civilization to ever walk the earth? We think fossil records teach us all we need to know about the history of life on earth. But the only creatures to get fossilized were the ones dumb enough to get stuck in the mud. If there was a civilization smart enough to say Hey, don't lie down in that muck pit, you idiot, we'd never even know they existed. If they were so smart, how come they all disappeared? Maybe they saw us coming.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-05-05 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-05-05 Pub. Date: 2018-05-05
Image Number: 171057
Caption: Your boy George Berkeley be trippin', Big L. Thinkin' he proved the existence of God. He argued the only thing we can be sure exist is our own minds. But because there got to be things in the universe we ain't ever thought of … that must mean there must be some all-seeing God out there, in whose mind erething exist. Later philosophers poked holes in that theory and what have you done, Clyde? That between my mind an' the big mind in the sky.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-03-27 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-03-27 Pub. Date: 2018-03-27
Image Number: 169898
Caption: There are vast oceans existing under the icy surface of Jupiter's moon Europa. It's possible there's as much life in those oceans as there is in our own. Maybe more. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? I'm thinking sexy mermaids. You? Sushi bonanza!!!
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-03-26 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-03-26 Pub. Date: 2018-03-26
Image Number: 169897
Caption: Sadie, I just heard something disturbing, and I think you're the only one who can tell me whether it's true. Youtube is telling me I've lived 300 years of phantom time. Pope Gregory XIII's math was off when he created our calendar, and this is actually the year 1717. What's more, the Middle Ages is just a fiction the pope created to explain his rounding error. You were there, Sadie ... did King Arthur really exist? I'll tell you about that nice boy, as soon as I demonstrate how we dealt with heretics.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-03-04 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-03-04 Pub. Date: 2018-03-04
Image Number: 168535
Caption: I wonder what life was like before the internet. What are you talking about? You don't have to wonder what life was like before the internet. You were here! We have no proof of that. I've googled myself. There's no reference to me existing prior to 1994. No blog posts, no photos, no tweets. I mean sure, you can find my birth certificate, but that means nothing. There is nothing online that was written by me, personally prior to 1994. Stop that!!! I found a box of old polaroids. They're supposedly pictures of me as a child. But there's no proof of that. There are no photos of me that have verifiable metadata or time stamps prior to 1994. Don't look at me like that. There isn't a single link proving you existed prior to 1997 ... so respect your elders. Stop that!!!
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-01-28 exist 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-01-28 Pub. Date: 2018-01-28
Image Number: 167088
Caption: Hi, I just got a notice that I owe $30k t the city in past freelance taxes. That's right. Because you didn't file as a business between 2007 and 2013. I wasn't a business. I was a reporter for a newspaper. They paid you with a 1099 instead of W-2. That makes you a business. They paid me with a 1099 so they could get away with not giving me benefits, and so they wouldn't have to give me paid time off! That doesn't mean I was running a business! Yes it does. I see you earned less than $100k per year. You wouldn't owe us anything if you filed for an exemption during the years you owed those taxes. You never told me this tax even existed! I'm not gonna pay you $30,000 for a tax I didn't owe just because you never told me I didn't owe it! You're right, sir. If you include the penalties, you're actually gonna pay us $38,000. You're going to make me become a Republican! You know that, right?! There's no special exemption for Republicans.
     
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