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Candorville

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Result page:    2  3  Next  (42 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-01-31 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-01-31 Pub. Date: 2018-01-31
Image Number: 167919
Caption: Do you have the time? Time? Time? Do you know the so-called experts say there's no such thing? First they said it was 3pm on the east coast when it's noon here. Then they said if you move faster, time moves slower. Then they said now for us might be a million years in the past for someone in another galaxy. It's ok to say I don't know what time it is. If Einstein doesn't have to make up his mind about what time it is, neither do I? Canada or bust!
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-12-11 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-12-11 Pub. Date: 2017-12-11
Image Number: 166001
Caption: Have you ever been to thetruesize.com? No. What's that? The maps we all use distort the sizes of the countries. The sizes are way off. That site lets you drag countries around to see how big they really are. Turns out Japan's as big as the entire east coast of the U.S. Brazil is almost as big as the United States. All of Africa is bigger than the U.S., India, Western Europe, Argentina and China combined. Same principle works for money. If you drag my seemingly tiny bank account around the globe, I'm actually super rich. Dios mio.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-08-16 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-08-16 Pub. Date: 2017-08-16
Image Number: 161533
Caption: You know what? If we ever create faster-than-light travel, we can prove whether Jesus existed. We found a planet orbiting a star in the Cygnus constellation 2,000 light years away. That means if we were there right now, we could peer back at earth through a super-powerful telescope and see events that happened 2,000 years ago. If Jesus were real, we could see him going about his business: performing miracles ... coming back from the dead ... picking his nose ... He never would've done that, Lemont. You know how much dust there is in the Middle East?
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-07-02 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-07-02 Pub. Date: 2017-07-02
Image Number: 159209
Caption: You ever think maybe the world would've been better off if we'd lost the Revolutionary War? Seriously? You gonna say that right before the Fourth of July? It's just a thought experiment. You scared of thought experiments? C-Dog ain't scared of nothin'. All right. Let's say France never helped us win the revolution. We'd have lost. Britain probably still would've freed the slaves in 1833, so ... No civil war. No backlash to reconstruction, so ... no KKK. France wouldn't have drowned in debt. Their monarchy would've lasted longer, so ... no Napoleon. No Napoleon, no threat uniting German nationalists, so ... no World War I or II ... no Hitler. No Manifest Destiny, so no genocide of Native Americans. The UK wouldn't have turned to the Middle East and Africa to replace its lost holdings, so ... no carving up the Ottoman Empire, no chaos in the Middle East, and no ISIS. Bruh ... if you don't wanna loan me $20 for fireworks, just say so. We'd probably still have black licorice. No getting around that.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-04-18 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-04-18 Pub. Date: 2017-04-18
Image Number: 157013
Caption: List of places a brotha ain't gotta visit before he die be getting' longer, Big L. Florida, 'cause of "Stand Your Ground" … Chicago 'cause of all them gunfights … the whole Middle East 'cause of Isis 'n' them … I should name the list an' trademark it. Lotta people be leavin' money on the table when they don't trademark. "Bucket List" would've been worth millions. Whachoo got that rhymes with "Bucket List"?
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-12-23 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-12-23 Pub. Date: 2016-12-23
Image Number: 152373
Caption: I realized Christmas was a bunch of nonsense when we was kids, Big L. You know why? 'Cause of all the snow. Reindeer in the snow. Pine trees in the snow. Fat Santa in the snow. But Jesus was from the Middle East, dawg. The Middle East where it's hot. That's why I decorate my tree with hummus. There wasn't nary a snowflake in the bible, bruh.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-01-09 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-01-09 Pub. Date: 2016-01-09
Image Number: 137380
Caption: Scuse me, you know how to get to west 73rd street. Yeah. Take the 409 east to Slauson, go straight past that fool Dwayne on the corner … Hang a left, another left … two more lefts … … Get back on the 409 west, exit on Florence, go two blocks and you're there. Need me to write that down? Y'know, it's okay to say "I don't know." (This cartoon was originally published on 2012-12-16).
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-08-06 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-08-06 Pub. Date: 2015-08-06
Image Number: 130586
Caption: Whachoo wanna watch, Big L? Anything but Sesame Street. My don't crazy about it. Sometimes he says "watch Elmo" over and over again for hours until I finally give in and turn it on. If I hear "La la la la la … La la la la … Elmo's world" one more time, I just might throw the tv into the East River. Parent be trippin'. Elmo should be considered a class 2 drug.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-07-29 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-07-29 Pub. Date: 2015-07-29
Image Number: 130316
Caption: Hey momma, remember my roommate from college? Yeah, the one with the poodle. Well guess what … He joined ISIS. Can you believe that? He's a despicable terrorist now. So can you please stop giving me a hard time about only calling you once or twice a week? I mean, at least I'm not rampaging across the Middle East slaughtering people and destroying ancient ruins. ... Hello?
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-06-21 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-06-21 Pub. Date: 2015-06-21
Image Number: 128073
Caption: I've done a lot of things in my life, doc. I'm a firm believer in sampling everything life has to offer. Dr. Noodle … Except for prison. I don't need to know what being imprisoned is like … or visiting the Middle East. I don't really need to end up in an orange jumpsuit ... or bug-eating. No offense to the rest of the world, but that's just nasty ... or flyfishing ... or pipe-smoking ... or body-piercing ... or alligator-wrestling ... or Jazzercise ... You're being awfully negative. Why don't we try focusing on the things you DO like to do? I don't like being negative.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-12-16 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-12-16 Pub. Date: 2014-12-16
Image Number: 120250
Caption: Scuse me, you know how to get to west 73rd street. Yeah. Take the 409 east to Slauson, go straight past that fool Dwayne on the corner … Hang a left, another left … two more lefts … … Get back on the 409 west, exit on Florence, go two blocks and you're there. Need me to write that down? Y'know, it's okay to say "I don't know." (This cartoon was originally published on 2012-04-19)
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-08-17 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-08-17 Pub. Date: 2014-08-17
Image Number: 114523
Caption: Dear Moron … I read your latest article about how Israel and the Palestinians are locked in a cycle of violence and neither side is doing the right thing. I don't appreciate the false equivalence! You completely neglected to point out the FACT that the side I support is RIGHT, and the other side is WRONG. Here is a list of everything the other side has done to MY side to provoke my side into using violence. Never talk about the Israeli-Palestinian thing. If the other side has a list too, it's illegitimate and you're a FOOL for believing any of it.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-07-31 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-07-31 Pub. Date: 2014-07-31
Image Number: 114483
Caption: It's so easy to just say they're all nuts, but what's YOUR brilliant solution to the Israeli-Palestinian conflict? Remember the east coast-west coast rap war from the 90's? Remember how Biggie an' Tupac mommas hugged each other an' told both sides to cut that #$%&@ out? It's ok to admit you don't have a solution, Clyde. Ain't nothin' a million mommas huggin' it out can't fix.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-07-30 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-07-30 Pub. Date: 2014-07-30
Image Number: 114482
Caption: What do you mean we're hypocrites? 'Cause we get why Israel use violence, but we act like we don’t get why Palestinians do it too. Israel been under siege since it started. But the Palestinians been livin' under military occupation for about as long. America started a revolution over some tea bags, so we shouldn't act like we don't get it. Israel has a duty to defend its own existence. That's why they both wrong: 'cause they both RIGHT.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-07-29 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-07-29 Pub. Date: 2014-07-29
Image Number: 114481
Caption: Nonviolence only work in certain circumstances, Big L. What do you mean? Worked in the civil rights struggle 'cause we was just demanding what the constitution already said we should have. Worked in South Africa 'cause the oppressed had leaders who didn't recognize the "other side's" right to exist. Ain't NONE a' that goin' on in Palestine, bruh. STOP HOPE-BLOCKING!!!
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-07-28 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-07-28 Pub. Date: 2014-07-28
Image Number: 114480
Caption: I think the Palestinians would get a lot further if they were to follow the lead of Gandhi, MLK and Mandela. You mean they should march all up an' down, sing spirituals and get beat upside the head for years? You'd be surprised at how much that can accomplish. Have you EVER cracked open a history book? Have YOU?
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-07-23 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-07-23 Pub. Date: 2014-07-23
Image Number: 114098
Caption: I had a dream last night. I dreamt that Israel's Prime Minister was Captain Kirk, of the starship Enterprise. And I dreamt Palestine's leader was also Captain Kirk, of a different Enterprise. Both ships were squaring off in orbit of Cestus III. The Metrons who lived on Cestus got annoyed and beamed both Kirks down to the planet to fight one-on-one. Who won? Not sure. There was lots of shirtlessness and karate chops, and then I woke up.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-07-22 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-07-22 Pub. Date: 2014-07-22
Image Number: 114097
Caption: How they gonna blame President Obama for what goin' on in the Middle East? They ain't nothin' no President in history ever done that ever changed the Middle East for the better. Blamin' our own President for them bein' crazy make no sense. I blame out Presidents for not brokering peace between 84th Street an' 85th Street.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-07-21 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-07-21 Pub. Date: 2014-07-21
Image Number: 114096
Caption: Did you hear about the attacks over in Israel and Palestine? Not sure. You mean the attacks where Israel got revenge on the Palestinians for takin' revenge on Israel? Or do you mean the attacks where Palestine got revenge on the Israelis for takin' revenge on Palestine. Yes. Yeh, I heard o' that.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-11-29 east 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-11-29 Pub. Date: 2012-11-29
Image Number: 90360
Caption: The Arab-Israeli Conflict: One Man's Analysis. Tap tap tap tap. The problem's been analyzed to death for the last 64 years. But EVERYONE has missed the obvious solution. Tap tap tap tap. A Breakdance Battle. People with jheri curls and sweatpants don’t shoot each other. Much. Tap tap tap.
     
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