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Candorville

Comics about doors.

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1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-11-02 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-11-02 Pub. Date: 2019-11-02
Image Number: 180107
Caption: If I promise to get you a new book tomorrow, will you go to sleep? Awe you exthtowting me? Am I Ukwaine? What do you mean Am I Ukraine? Where did you hear language like extorting? Are you listening at my door while I'm watching the news, again? You know you're not supposed to do that. If you'we impeached, do I become the new daddy? Go ... to ... sleep.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-05-06 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-05-06 Pub. Date: 2019-05-06
Image Number: 177508
Caption: I applied for a Home Depot credit card, Susan. What? Why? You rent. How much Home Depot stuff could you need? Well, when I picked little Lionel up from Toddlerville day care and asked him what he learned today … he said they learned how to barricade the door and hide form an active shooter. This country is sick. Toddlerville told me they didn't have the budget for bulletproof doors, so I figured I'd build them some.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-03-08 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-03-08 Pub. Date: 2019-03-08
Image Number: 176628
Caption: Daddy, what is six twafficking? Uh … What? Where'd you hear that? You were on the phone talking about six twafficking in Flowida. Oh. Well, you know that you're not supposed to listen to Daddy's door when he's being a journalist. So what's it mean? … It means there are six kings in charge of traffic. Oh.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-01-07 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-01-07 Pub. Date: 2019-01-07
Image Number: 175736
Caption: What's the best way to ask my boss for a promotion? C-Dog's incredibly bad advice $2. You say you got other options, so she better hook you up right quick or you out the door. That's the same advice you gave me about asking women out. Here's the secret 'bout life: Every relationship be the same relationship.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-10-14 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-10-14 Pub. Date: 2018-10-14
Image Number: 174287
Caption: My friend Miranda asked me what I thought of the outfit she was going to wear to Burning Man. It was very, very … revealing. How did that make you feel? Like she was toying with me. She made it clear twenty years ago that she just wanted to be friends. But here she was showing me something that she had to know would poke my furnace. You mean stoke your furnace. No, I mean poke. My furnace has been stoked since Freshman year -- it took me years to get that down from a raging inferno to a barely perceptible glow. I see. I think. So I juggled the furnace door to make sure it was locked, and then I stood there wondering if she was poking the coals to reignite them, or poking the coals to make sure they were dead. Or, maybe she just wanted a furnace's opinio -- can we not talk in metaphors? I'm confused. I welded shut the furnace door and turned on the A.C. just to be safe.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-09-25 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-09-25 Pub. Date: 2018-09-25
Image Number: 174192
Caption: This just in: Astronomers discover and earthlike planet orbiting the nearest start, Prozima Centauri … click … Some are starting to question whether there's proof President Trump's grandfather immigrated from Germany. He could have come from anywhere. Click ... Proxima Centauri is just 4.24 light years away. In cosmic terms that's right next door. This side up.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-06-22 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-06-22 Pub. Date: 2018-06-22
Image Number: 172358
Caption: I'm tired of people complaining about the treatment of refugees from Canardville. Mayor Thump never asked them to come here. Their whole town fell into a giant sinkhole. They're right next door. Where were they supposed to go? Who cares? Not here. And I'm tired of people whining about how the mayor put them all in jail and took all their babies away form them. They should've thought of that before they chose to be born in a town that would one day sink into a giant sinkhole.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-11-18 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-11-18 Pub. Date: 2017-11-18
Image Number: 164875
Caption: What up witcha girl Siri, bruh? What do you mean? I was mindin' my business, watchin' "Gilligan's Island." All of a sudden cops bust down my door an' demand to know what I done to my "little buddy." The rookie cop kept screamin' "Drop the coconut." Oh yeah. I forgot to mention Apple's Siri sometimes calls the police if it thinks the voices from the tv told it to call 911. I ain't even had no coconut.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-09-23 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-09-23 Pub. Date: 2017-09-23
Image Number: 162853
Caption: If I promise to get you a new book tomorrow, will you go to sleep? Ith that a bwibe? Awe we cowooding? What do you mean "are we colluding?" Where did you hear language like that? Are you listening at my door while I'm watching the news again? You know you're not supposed to do that. If you'we impeached, do I become the new daddy? Go ... to ... sleep.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-07-29 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-07-29 Pub. Date: 2017-07-29
Image Number: 160762
Caption: Hello, you've reached Concast Cable's reconnection department. To answer your question, yes, we can reconnect the tv service you canceled for an additional $85/month. What are you talking about? I didn't ask you any questions. And you called me. Yes, we can be there tomorrow between 8-5. You people are getting desperate. Do not lean on door.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-03-26 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-03-26 Pub. Date: 2017-03-26
Image Number: 155437
Caption: Yesterday, I visited my 97-year-old grandpa for the first time in six months. Dr. Noodle. He opened his door. I said "Grandpa! I missed you!" He looked me up and down and said "You gained a pound." It was all I could think about the whole time. As I drove him to his favorite restaurant, I was worried the seatbelt made me look bulgy ... When we ordered, I felt like he was judging my choices and so I only ordered crackers and water. When I hugged him goodbye, I sucked my gut in as hard as I could. Why don't we just focus on the fact he hugged you? When he hugged me, he said "You at that whole cracker."
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-02-16 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-02-16 Pub. Date: 2017-02-16
Image Number: 154535
Caption: You'we gwounded, daddy. Why? You thed a cuth wowd. I did not say a cuss word. Yeth you did! You thed censored I can't believe I owe five censored thouthand dollarth! What did daddy tell you about listening at his door when He's doing his taxes? You're grounded.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-01-17 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-01-17 Pub. Date: 2017-01-17
Image Number: 153405
Caption: Ok … so here's what happened after Vancouver opened her door. Keep in mind, it'd been a year of longing anticipation. I'd had a year to rehearse what I would say and do once we met each other again. "I would stun her with my friendly smile, and melt her with my bedroom eyes ... I would approach her with a confident swagger and embrace her with loving arms ... I would whisper something charming she'd always remember." Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-01-16 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-01-16 Pub. Date: 2017-01-16
Image Number: 153404
Caption: Ok, I'm going to tell you what happened when Vancouver answered her door. Ok, since you asked. She and I … wait, what? What do you mean "since you asked"? I thought you asked how my week was. How did "I'm going to tell you what happened when Vancouver opened her door" sound like "how was your week?" How'd it sound like what? "How was your week?" Well, since you keep asking, I guess I'll tell you ...
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-12-19 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-12-19 Pub. Date: 2016-12-19
Image Number: 152369
Caption: So how'd Canada go, Lemont? How'd it go when you and "Vancouver" saw each other for the first time in a year? It went horribly. When she opened the door, it was fireworks all over again. The evening was pure magic. The next few days were even better. That does sound horrible. It was as if the great author in the sky were setting me up for a soul-crushing plot twist.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-12-15 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-12-15 Pub. Date: 2016-12-15
Image Number: 152113
Caption: Maybe I should just go back to America and forget about "Vancouver." If I cross this street, walk up that hill, and knock on her door … I'll ruin it for both of us. In-person romance is way different from Facebook. In person, you can't delete or edit your comments before hitting "send." You can't send perfect photos with perfect lighting and perfect angles. I would say "Stop being a punk #@$%," but we don't cuss in Canada.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-09-20 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-09-20 Pub. Date: 2016-09-20
Image Number: 148762
Caption: You're with what? "Jehovah's Alibi." Wit' all the terrible things happening in the world today … you may be wonderin' if a higher power know you done some o' that … and you may be wonderin' how you can blame that higher power for the stuff you done did. Tell me more. Kevin, give her a copy of the I-Ain't-Seen-Nothin' Tower.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-09-19 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-09-19 Pub. Date: 2016-09-19
Image Number: 148761
Caption: We don't want any. We ain't sellin' any. We jus' spreadin' the good news. Oh. No offense, but we don't want Jehovah's Witnesses ringing our doorbell. Me neither. But … I thought you were saying you were a Jehovah's Witness. Never said that. Oh. We with Jehovah's Alibi.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-09-06 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-09-06 Pub. Date: 2016-09-06
Image Number: 148215
Caption: This just in: Astronomers discover an earthlike planet orbiting the nearest star, Proxima Centauri. Click … Some are starting to question whether there's proof Donald Trump's grandfather immigrated from Germany. He could have come from anywhere. Click ... Proxima Centauri is just 4.24 light years away. In cosmic terms that's right next door. This end up.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-04-22 door 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-04-22 Pub. Date: 2016-04-22
Image Number: 142116
Caption: Hi, this is Lemont Brown. I'm looking for a good preschool for my son, and you come highly recommended. Yes, he interacts "well" with other kids … Yes, he "follows" directions … Yes, he's potty "trained." What do you mean you're rejecting my son? … Seriously? How could you tell I was using air quotes over the phone? ... Hello? Do not lean on door.
     
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