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Candorville

Comics about dogs.

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1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-08-11 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-08-11 Pub. Date: 2017-08-11
Image Number: 161295
Caption: What we gotta go anywhere else for? Y'all can have your Norways an' Canadas an' Denmarks … if you need to be "happy" an' "educated" an' "health-cared" an' not shot or locked up in a private prison. All y'all soft bruthas can move if you want to, but C-Dog ain't 'fraid of hard-livin'. I'm not running away, Clyde, I just want us to measure up to every other civilized country. You want a unicorn with that, or just a pony?
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-07-02 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-07-02 Pub. Date: 2017-07-02
Image Number: 159209
Caption: You ever think maybe the world would've been better off if we'd lost the Revolutionary War? Seriously? You gonna say that right before the Fourth of July? It's just a thought experiment. You scared of thought experiments? C-Dog ain't scared of nothin'. All right. Let's say France never helped us win the revolution. We'd have lost. Britain probably still would've freed the slaves in 1833, so ... No civil war. No backlash to reconstruction, so ... no KKK. France wouldn't have drowned in debt. Their monarchy would've lasted longer, so ... no Napoleon. No Napoleon, no threat uniting German nationalists, so ... no World War I or II ... no Hitler. No Manifest Destiny, so no genocide of Native Americans. The UK wouldn't have turned to the Middle East and Africa to replace its lost holdings, so ... no carving up the Ottoman Empire, no chaos in the Middle East, and no ISIS. Bruh ... if you don't wanna loan me $20 for fireworks, just say so. We'd probably still have black licorice. No getting around that.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-06-13 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-06-13 Pub. Date: 2017-06-13
Image Number: 159152
Caption: C'mon, little man. We goin' to Uncle C-Dog place 'cause you pop's done gone to … wait … what's wrong, Bruh? Brixton. He's being not nice. Day care. Whachoomean? What Brixton done? He push you off the sings? He put sand in your hair? He take your dinosaur? Lionel. Sophie. He said my daddy is and "enema of the American people because he's a journalist." don't nobody take Lionel Brown dinosaur. Wait ... what? I told Ms. Karen but Brixton said it was fake news.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-03-31 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-03-31 Pub. Date: 2017-03-31
Image Number: 156201
Caption: You know why I don't buy none of your books, bruh? It's 'cause you a snitch. Your books always be based on what real people do. You got Susan up in there. You got me up in there. You even got Big Oatmeal up in those books, puttin' us all on blast. What're you talking about, "C-Dog"? Yeah, I loosely base my stories on my life and on the people I know, but I change all the names and details for privacy's sake. Ain't nobody fooled by you callin' me C-Cat," snitch. C-Cat's a composite of several different people.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-03-07 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-03-07 Pub. Date: 2017-03-07
Image Number: 155380
Caption: Did you see Trump's address to Congress last week? Nah, bruh. Did you catch the "Gilligan's Island" marathon on channel 32 last night? . I don't watch broadcast tv. I only watch Netflix and Hulu. You wanna catch a movie? Watched them all off bittorrent for free already, bruh. You get Kanye new album? I only download songs I like and make my own playlists. Read any good books? C-Dog only read tweets.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-01-27 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-01-27 Pub. Date: 2017-01-27
Image Number: 153705
Caption: I'm gonna call momma and see how she's doing. Tell yo momma C-Dog say "how they hangin'." Hey, momma, how're you doing? Clyde says hi. You're still hanging around with that disrespectful, nefarious, good-for-nothing, jheri-curled little goon?! Tell yo momma she all wrong about me. I ain't had no jheri curl since 1987.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-12-25 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-12-25 Pub. Date: 2016-12-25
Image Number: 151999
Caption: You know what really, really bugs me? People who get all upset just because I always let my dog off his leash where I'm not supposed to. Last week, Killer and I were taking our usual stroll in the park. I let the little fella off his leash just so he could get some real exercise. He deserves it as much as anyone. When he got maybe 1,000 feet from me, he came across some kid's birthday party. Killer's a curious little fella, so naturally he darted into the Bouncy House. Next thing you know, there was all this screaming, just 'cause Killer started licking the birthday boy's face and chewing on his hair. All that screaming hurt poor Killer's feelings, so naturally he started growling. Then I told them Killer was friendly, so that should've been that, right? Can you believe they demanded I buy the kid new pants? It's not my fault they never potty trained him. Forget the dogs, it's the owners who should have to get licensed.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-11-01 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-11-01 Pub. Date: 2016-11-01
Image Number: 150472
Caption: C-Dog, my stocks haven't appreciated in years. Should I hold or sell? C-Dog's incredibly bad advice 50¢. I get that question all the time. Here what you do: Pull out all your money … an' take it down to the alley between 42 an' 43 Vernon Street. Ask for "Big Oatmeal," he offer alternative investments that give you better odds. E'rethang from dice, to dominoes, to chicken fights. Chicken fights? It's important to diversify.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-10-31 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-10-31 Pub. Date: 2016-10-31
Image Number: 150471
Caption: Neither party does anything for me. Why should I vote? C-Dog's incredibly bad advice 50¢. The answer is simple, bruh: You shouldn't. Your vote is your voice. 'Least it the only voice a politician listen to. Best way to get a politician to listen to you is to not say anything.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-09-12 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-09-12 Pub. Date: 2016-09-12
Image Number: 148479
Caption: I am the God of thy father Cletus. What? Who that? Cletus. Cletus Dogg. Your father. Didn't nobody call my daddy "Cletus." Erebody called him "Hot Sauce." I call him by his given n Never mind, that is not important right now, Clyde. "C-Dog." (Sigh) fine, C ... no, it's not fine.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-08-29 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-08-29 Pub. Date: 2016-08-29
Image Number: 147919
Caption: Clyde, have you seen the trailer for that new Eddie Murphy movie? Yes, "Magical Negro." I seen it. It's not called "Magical Negro." You mean it ain't about a black character whose only purpose is to use his special insight to aid white characters? It's a true story. So that's different. And it's called "Mr. Church." C-Dog call a movie what it should be called. Wanna go see "Mr. Church" with me? I'd rather go see "Watch Margot Robbie in Hot Pants for Two Hours" again.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-08-25 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-08-25 Pub. Date: 2016-08-25
Image Number: 147665
Caption: C-Dog don't never dream 'cause dreamin' just make real life worse, Big L. Let's say I dream I can stand on a corner or walk across the street without some cop bothering me. Then when I wake up, no matter where I go, there some cop lookin' out his car window at me, just waiting for a reason to "put me in my place." If I don't dream things can be better, then I ain't never disappointed. I know what you mean. Last night I dreamt you weren't depressing.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-08-24 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-08-24 Pub. Date: 2016-08-24
Image Number: 147664
Caption: What's the last dream you remember, Clyde? C-Dog don't dream, bruh. I'm either asleep or I'm not. Ain't no in-between. Dreaming's for indecisive brothas. Maybe you just don't remember your dreams, Clyde. If I don't remember something, it didn't happen. That's C-Dog motto.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-08-09 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-08-09 Pub. Date: 2016-08-09
Image Number: 147066
Caption: How do I take care of my child, do my work, and still make time to do the things I used to do for fun? C-Dog's Incredibly Bad Advice $2. Your problem is you think you can have e'rethang. Butcha-cain't! Get over it! In life, you ALWAYS gotta pick two outta three. Is that backed up by any studies? Oh, so you want advice cheap, quick and well-informed?
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-08-08 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-08-08 Pub. Date: 2016-08-08
Image Number: 147065
Caption: I remember I used to have hobbies. I used to collect comics, I used to read, I used to bike, I used to go to the movies I played tennis, I played cards, I shot pool, I whittled little Vulcan hand salutes out of driftwood But once I had a kid, that all changed. I can't remember the last time I did any of that. It's like all I do all day is make sure he doesn't drop dead. Take some time off from that. C-Dog's Incredibly Bad Advice $2.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-07-31 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-07-31 Pub. Date: 2016-07-31
Image Number: 145874
Caption: Hello, Mr. Dogg. My hingoa is "Richie." I am calling from illustrious Tonga Tech Alumni Association. You achieved your degree at our online university. Got my doctorate, fool. Get it right. We would like for to extend to you the invitation to now pursue your double doctorate. For a low low price of only $150 U.S. dollars per day you can take your Tonga Tech educationals to the ultimate level in only six weeks. Whatchyall got in your extra-doctorate program, bruh? C-Dog time is valuable. I ain't got six weeks for you, not unless your curriculum is bangin'. We've got very many programs of some sort that will allow you to call yourself "Double Doctor." ... such as a doctorate in real estate management, taught by cardboard cutout of Donald Trump. Lemme think about it. "Double Doctor Dogg" got a ring to it.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-07-30 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-07-30 Pub. Date: 2016-07-30
Image Number: 146475
Caption: I'm not the most confident guy. How can I build up my confidence? Simple. Interrupt erebody. C-Dog's Incredibly Bad Advice. When you interrupt people in mid-sentence, it ruin they confidence. Throws them off they game. Then they even less confident than you. So what you're saying it, don't worry about building myself up, just tear the other guy down. That'll be $2.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-05-22 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-05-22 Pub. Date: 2016-05-22
Image Number: 143085
Caption: 1984. Do you think Terrence likes me, Lemont? Who's "Terrence"? I don't know any "Terrence." I know a "Turbo," and a "C-dog," and a "Rerun," and a "Big Oatmeal," and a "Greazy." I know a "Night Court," a "Shorty," a "Cheese-face," a "Rocky," and "Airwolf," a "Riptide," a "Boss," a "Voltron," a "Schoolbreak Special," and a "Big Cheeto." In fact, I'm pretty sure if there was a "Terrence" in our class, he'd go to great lengths to make sure none of us ever knew it. You've asked me an unanswerable question, Susan. The fact he told you his name was "Terrence" is either proof he loves you or proof he's trying to push you away. How come you don't have a nickname? The only on I wanted was "Prince," but living up to it would be too much pressure.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-05-21 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-05-21 Pub. Date: 2016-05-21
Image Number: 143337
Caption: I took Lionel to his second baseball game the other day. We hadn't been to a Candorville Chokers game in two years. Back then, two Choker dogs, cokes and fries cost me $38. Last night it cost me $48. Back then, all the players were like 10 years younger than I was. But now they are all like 15 years younger. Having a kid speeds up the aging process. Baseball still around?
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-04-25 dog 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-04-25 Pub. Date: 2016-04-25
Image Number: 142409
Caption: You have any plans today, Clyde? Nah dawg, that ain't how it go. The C-Dog dont make plans, Big L. You make a plan, you spend all day tryin' to make that plan happen. An' you fail to capitalize on the dozens of random opportunities that come outta no place ereday. Plans is for the lazy. (This cartoon was originally published on 2014-04-14).
     
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