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Candorville

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Result page:     (16 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-10-11 doesn't matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-10-11 Pub. Date: 2019-10-11
Image Number: 179808
Caption: Facebook Messages. From Sasha Mitchell. Lemont? It's been a while. I just wanted you to know I'm thinking of visiting your city. And? Are you saying you'd like to visit me? Are you hoping to rekindle our passionate love affair? Are you going to explain why you told me we'd run away together and be happy and then you DISAPPEARED for years? Well it doesn't matter, because I have a girlfriend. Tap tap tap ta- Delete delete delete. Tap tap tap t- Cool. Have a good time. Thank you.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-10-11 doesn't matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-10-11 Pub. Date: 2018-10-11
Image Number: 174390
Caption: Hello, Tara: I just want to say … I love my son more than life itself. My love will always be with him, no matter what happens. I've lived a long life. Seen many things. Gone many places. I have to regrets. By the way, I'm having a major medical procedure done tomorrow. But if my son doesn't call me before then, no big deal. I just don't want HIM to have regrets. (Hopefully I don't accidentally send this text to him, totally by mistake.) (Sigh) Better call Momma. People have been known to die from tooth-cleaning. Just saying.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-07-22 doesn't matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-07-22 Pub. Date: 2017-07-22
Image Number: 160506
Caption: You know why most political comic strips are leftist? Tell me. Sponsorship. There's no product-placement allowed. So there's no financial incentive to sell out to the big corporations. So political strips are free to talk about how Mansanto loves us. How big pharma over-loves us. How the oil industry is loves us, etc. Because one of those corporate friends can advertise in comic strips. But they advertise in newspapers, right? Doesn't matter. Editors and publishers don't ever read the comics.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-11-03 doesn't matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-11-03 Pub. Date: 2015-11-03
Image Number: 134722
Caption: Hello, Tara: I just want to say … I love my son more than life itself. My love will always be with him, no matter what happens. I've lived a long life. Seen many things. Gone many places. I have no regrets. By the way, I'm having a major medical procedure done tomorrow. But if my son doesn't call me before then, no big deal. I just don't want HIM to have regrets. (Hopefully I don't accidentally send this text to him, totally by mistake.) (Sigh) Better call momma. People have been known to die from tooth-cleanings. Just saying.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-11-12 doesn't matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-11-12 Pub. Date: 2014-11-12
Image Number: 118788
Caption: Zeno's Paradox theorizes that I can never actually reach my destination. If I have to travel one mile, first I have to reach half a mile. Then I have to cover half the remaining distance, then half again, and so on. Every distance, no matter how small, can be divided in half infinitely; so I can never actually get where I'm going. That still doesn't explain why you're always late. (Published originally on March 29, 2012.)
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-08-05 doesn't matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-08-05 Pub. Date: 2014-08-05
Image Number: 114618
Caption: Momma, I just want to thank you for always being there for me, no matter what I needed to talk about. When I needed to talk about girls, you were there. When I needed to know why God let bad things happen, you were there. You've always been there for anything ... ... EXCEPT when I want to talk about my dad. No, momma, that doesn't sound like static, it sounds more like you hissing "gwaaoowaaoo." Click. (Originally published on 2012-03-02).
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-08-30 doesn't matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-08-30 Pub. Date: 2012-08-30
Image Number: 86877
Caption: I was watching the Republican National Convention … When I realized it doesn't matter. Almost nobody is undecided anymore. We all made up our minds years ago. You sound awfully sure of that. See?
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-03-28 doesn't matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-03-28 Pub. Date: 2012-03-28
Image Number: 77952
Caption: Zeno's paradox theorizes that I can never actually reach my destination. If I have to travel one mile, first I have to reach half a mile. Then I have to cover the remaining distance, then half again, and so on. Ever distance, no matter how small, can be divided in half infinitely; so I can never actually get where I'm going. That still doesn't explain why you're always late.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-03-02 doesn't matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-03-02 Pub. Date: 2012-03-02
Image Number: 76894
Caption: Momma, I just want to thank you for always being there for me, no matter what I needed to talk about. When I needed to talk about girls, you were there. When I needed to know why God let bad things happen, you were there. You've always been there for anything ... Except when I want to talk about my dad. No, momma, that doesn't sound like static, it sounds more like you hissing "gwaaoowaaoo." Click.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-11-17 doesn't matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-11-17 Pub. Date: 2011-11-17
Image Number: 72985
Caption: facebook. Messages. From SASHA MITCHELL. I can't leave Webster right now, Lemont. It doesn't matter how mean he is to me … I have children. When you have kids, your life isn't yours anymore. It’s theirs. If leaving a horrible marriage is going to make their lives worse, you STAY. Because your own life is over, over, OVER. Can we change the subject? How are YOU doing? I just won custody of Lionel. Tap tap ta- tap t- t- Um ... By all that, I meant to say your life is just beginning.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-11-21 doesn't matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-11-21 Pub. Date: 2010-11-21
Image Number: 54276
Caption: … So anyway, I'm in this Thai restaurant, and … Which one? Doesn't really matter, for this story. Ok. … Anyway, I overhear the couple at the next table talking. He says "B-- Are they old or young? What's the difference? Young. Ish. Anyway … he says "But you always order the chicken satay!" What ethnicity are they? Does. Not. Matter. Anyway ... she replies "Don't feel like it anymore." So he gets all sad and says ... "If you can get tired of chicken satay ... who's to say you won't get tired of me? What's the lady wearing?
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-09-01 doesn't matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-09-01 Pub. Date: 2010-09-01
Image Number: 51488
Caption: Wow, look at all those people at Stephen King's table. I always feel bad for "the other guy" at these things. So I buy a book and feign interest. Thanks. I feel much better now. I like to spread the happy. Who should I make this out to? Doesn't matter.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-09-01 doesn't matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-09-01 Pub. Date: 2009-09-01
Image Number: 37998
Caption: Are you stealing from me? Why do you ask? Never mind, take it. Take it all. It doesn't matter. Nothing matters anymore. I've lost the one woman who could've made me happy. Anything you could take from me now could never compare to -- TOUCH MY STAR TREK DVDS AND I BITE YOUR FINGER OFF AT THE KNUCKLE. ... Could never compare to losing her. Freak.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-04-26 doesn't matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-04-26 Pub. Date: 2009-04-26
Image Number: 31773
Caption: 1982. Why you talk so white? You think you better than me? It's ok, baby. Don't pay those kids any mind. You have the right - the obligation - to be true to yourself. You don't have to be like everyone else. It doesn't matter how you say, it only matters what you say. Always remember, baby: If you're educated, talk like you're educated. "Speak" like you're educated, not "talk" like you're educated, momma. Don't you get smart with me.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-12-09 doesn't matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-12-09 Pub. Date: 2007-12-09
Image Number: 20127
Caption: What's that, Roxanne? What's what? THAT. On your finger. Tsk. It's my engagement ring. Remember, Lem-lem, we're getting married? But… that's not the ring I gave you. Of course not, silly. That one was way too small so daddy replaced it for you. WHAT?! WHO DOES THAT? HOW COULD YOU... HOW COULD HE... All right. All right. It's just a ring. It doesn't matter. By the way, Daddy bought you this hairpiece.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-11-14 doesn't matter 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-11-14 Pub. Date: 2006-11-14
Image Number: 15271
Caption: I wanted to be rich and successful when I proposed to Roxanne, Susan. Money doesn’t matter, Lemont. You're willing to marry someone (who you can't get along with) because she had your baby, even if it means you'll all be miserable forever. When you've got that kind of devotion, buddy, you've got everything. you've go a point! NO I DON'T!
     
Result page:     (16 images)