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Candorville

Comics about doctors and doctoring.

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101. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-07-04 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-07-04 Pub. Date: 2010-07-04
Image Number: 49076
Caption: So, tell me about your mother. Why? For some reason, you won't let go of Kelly, even though she's not treating you the way you want. So the question is, why wont' you let go? What are you holding on to so desperately? What are you so afraid of losing? Because it's not HER. It's something your mother failed to give you. You felt like you got it from Kelly. But she's not giving it to you. She's just like your mother. We spend our lives dating our mothers. Speak for yourself, sicko.
     
102. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-06-06 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-06-06 Pub. Date: 2010-06-06
Image Number: 48018
Caption: Kelly told me she needs "space," Doc. Hm. Tell me again about her stalkers. Well, there was the guy from high school … then this guy at work … then this other guy, Ron. They had a relationship. But he just couldn't let go, always calling her, trying harder and harder to get her back. Delusional fool couldn't take a hint. For years he'd call and call and call. Ok ... now ... tell me again what Kelly used to ask you? "If I got nervous and ran, would you follow me?" She would ask me that all the time, and smile when I finally said "yes." ... Fascinating. This might be a test. Maybe I should call her.
     
103. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-05-30 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-05-30 Pub. Date: 2010-05-30
Image Number: 47787
Caption: What do you mean "If you're a writer, come up with a poem right now"? I write prose. I write short stories, with plots and dialogues and multiple characters struggling against each other. I don't have to spit out a poem to prove I'm a writer. That's like telling a heart surgeon to perform BRAIN surgery to prove he's a doctor. Not convinced, dawg ... that don't even come CLOSE to rhyming.
     
104. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-05-23 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-05-23 Pub. Date: 2010-05-23
Image Number: 47477
Caption: Things were going so well with Kelly. We started off texting. But we grew so close that we couldn't bear to be apart. I drove 400 miles up north to see her. It was magical, like she and I were the only people in the whole universe. So I drove back up the next month. She was busy but I got to see her for a couple of hours. We were so deeply in love! Did she ever drive down to see you? Um ... why do you ask? Fascinating. So I drove up a third time ...
     
105. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-05-16 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-05-16 Pub. Date: 2010-05-16
Image Number: 47227
Caption: So how are things with you and Kelly? (sigh) Fine. What was that? What was what? You sighed. That means you're suppressing an emotion. Probably sadness or a sense of futility. Are you sure, Doc? Are you sure I'm not just involuntarily drawing in air to cool down my internal organs? I mean. my ovaries have been kinda hot lately. You don't have ovaries. Kelly does.
     
106. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-05-02 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-05-02 Pub. Date: 2010-05-02
Image Number: 46759
Caption: Since you're new to therapy, I'll tell you the ground rules. Since you're new to therapy, I'll tell you the ground rules. What you say is just between us, unless you tell me about abuse or you threaten someone. What you say is just between us, unless you tell me about abuse or you threaten someone. Why are you doing that? Why are you doing that? Stop that. Stop that. I think we can dispense with me asking why you're seeking therapy. I think we can dispense with me asking why you're seeking therapy.
     
107. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-04-30 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-04-30 Pub. Date: 2010-04-30
Image Number: 46757
Caption: I said "So I think I'll go to my online-college reunion." Further back. "Maybe they'll switch my doctorate for a Master's Degree." Further back. "I'm tired of people callin' me 'Doctor Dogg.'" Further back. "I think I'd like to be called 'Master Dogg.'" Next time I say "back up," just smack me.
     
108. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-04-25 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-04-25 Pub. Date: 2010-04-25
Image Number: 46588
Caption: … So there I was in the underpants aisle, when I saw him! It was my shrink! Buying underpants! We made eye contact! I know we made eye contact! But he totally ignored me. I mean yeah, when I first went to therapy he said he'd ignore me if we ever crossed paths outside this safe room, but c'mon! But then I realized, maybe this shrink did me a favor by being so incredibly rude to me. Being ignored is my worst fear, and he made me face it. He cured me of my problem ... ... By being a complete jerk-ward. I see. Fascinating. But you started therapy to be cured of your passive-aggressiveness. Turns out the world needs jerk-wads.
     
109. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-04-24 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-04-24 Pub. Date: 2010-04-24
Image Number: 46587
Caption: So, how are you two getting along? Very well. Dr. Noodle Couple's Counseling. I discovered a cable news channel that sees the world exactly as I do. So now when I turn HER on, she never challenges me with inconvenient facts. Or ratings … I mean, our relationship ... is stronger than ever.
     
110. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-04-22 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-04-22 Pub. Date: 2010-04-22
Image Number: 46585
Caption: Ok … What was the Civil War about, if not slavery? You don't really want to know; you're just patronizing me. Fine, don't tell me! Well since you asked … It was about people defending their homes against an oppressive, distant government. … That wanted to abolish slavery. Minor detail. YOU SEE WHAT I'M WORKING WITH?!
     
111. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-04-20 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-04-20 Pub. Date: 2010-04-20
Image Number: 46437
Caption: The Civil War was not about slavery. It was about patriots fighting for limited government. (Click.) You're suffering from a Vulcan mind-meld, Doctor. That green-blooded son of a BEEP! It's his revenge for all those arguments we lost. Turn it back to CNN, Lemont. Not until she starts making sense! Lemont, this is not the way -- (Click). I AM YOUR FATHER! I brought you into this world, and I'll take you out!
     
112. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-03-21 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-03-21 Pub. Date: 2010-03-21
Image Number: 45150
Caption: I've fallen in love with another woman. But my wife and I have so much history. This other woman, Kelly, makes me happy. And that makes me miserable! Nobody but my wife should make me happy. What kind of sick jerk am I to allow another woman to make me happy! But things just aren't like they used to be with my wife. We don't have the same spark we used to have. Hmmm ... I see. Should I move on, doc? Considering your wife left you for another man eight months ago, that might not be a bad idea. You don't think it's too soon?
     
113. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-03-17 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-03-17 Pub. Date: 2010-03-17
Image Number: 45146
Caption: Lemont, Susan's in love, and your love life's a complete wreck. You've got two choices … You can be jealous of her happiness and sink into a putrid lake of despair where you'll be forever mired in cynicism and bitterness … Or you can let her happiness give you hope that someday you can find your own. ... What was that first option again? Ok we're out of time today.
     
114. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-03-16 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-03-16 Pub. Date: 2010-03-16
Image Number: 45145
Caption: Susan's been dating Dick Fink for months. She's probably happy and fulfilled. Hold on! … Are you jealous of Dick, or are you jealous of SUSAN?! Maybe you didn't want SUSAN! Maybe you wanted what Susan HAS! Happiness! Love! … With a hairy, shady gerbil of a man? Not wise to stand in the way of the therapy-breakthrough train. "Therapy-breakthrough train"? Too clunky?
     
115. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-03-15 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-03-15 Pub. Date: 2010-03-15
Image Number: 45144
Caption: Doc, it still bugs me that Susan's in love with another man. Your relationship with Roxanne was miserable because you were really in love with Susan. But Susan loves someone else anyway. So your pining for her poisoned your relationship with Roxanne for NOTHING. Therapy makes me feel SO much better. You wasted years of your life that you'll never get back.
     
116. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-02-11 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-02-11 Pub. Date: 2010-02-11
Image Number: 43926
Caption: I know it's anathema to my profession … But there's an emerging school of thought that fear of public ridicule is a major factor in maintaining sanity. Try posting your delusions to your twitter account. You'll be shocked sane by the resulting mockery. How many people constitute an "emerging school of thought"? That's not important right now.
     
117. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-02-10 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-02-10 Pub. Date: 2010-02-10
Image Number: 43925
Caption: I have my doubts that you're truly recovering, Lemont. I told you … … I accept that the vampires and demons I've seen all year were all in my head. Nevertheless, I want to try a novel approach. Hypnotism? Shock therapy? Post your delusions to an anonymous twitter account and then watch as all your followers tell you you're insane. Can I see your degree again? Hear me out ...
     
118. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-02-09 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-02-09 Pub. Date: 2010-02-09
Image Number: 43924
Caption: I don't see why I need a follow-up appointment. You went through something traumatic … … We need to ensure your recovery's on track. Watching all those earthquake victims suffering on my TV was hard. But then "Seinfeld" came on and I was fine. … Or were you referring to that psychotic break I had? Let's back up a second ...
     
119. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-01-28 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-01-28 Pub. Date: 2010-01-28
Image Number: 43364
Caption: Sunnyville Sanitarium. Now that you've accepted that the demons and vampires were all in your head, I'm giving you a clean bill of health, Lemont. That's a little joke I like to tell anyway, I'm afraid Dubble Cross wouldn't cover your stay here. $92,000?!?! Oh … my … heart! Does Dubble Cross cover heart attacks? Yes, they generally do. MY HEART!!!!
     
120. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-01-26 doctor 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-01-26 Pub. Date: 2010-01-26
Image Number: 43362
Caption: Where am I? Well … Blink blink. Mister Russell, you promised not to write on the walls … No one will give me any paper … Thin walls. (Pant! Pant!) What is this? Sunnydale. Do you know where you are, Buffy? No, none of that's real, none of it. Dentist's office? Optometrist? No? Not exactly.
     
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