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Candorville

Comics about divorces and divorcing.

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Result page:    2  Next  (28 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-09-01 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-09-01 Pub. Date: 2019-09-01
Image Number: 179190
Caption: I want you to work on something when you get home, minion. I'm supposed to be able to rest once I've gone home. I've always wanted to have a trademark one-liner, like the heroes of all those old action movies. Like in Cobra. Sylvester Stallone was a rogue cop who told a criminal You're the disease, and I'm the cure. Or like in Total Recall, when Arnold Schwarzenegger's wife turned out to be an evil killer. He eliminated her and then said Consider that a divorce. Or like in They live, when just before he killed a bunch of evil aliens, Rowdy Roddy Piper said "I have come here to chew bubblegum, and kick (butt) ... and I'm al out of bubblegum. Your task tonight is to generate six one-liners I can use whenever I squeeze unpaid work out of my employees. I'm supposed to be able to rest once I've gone home. You're the rest, and I'm the bed. The kind with spikes on it ... See? That's awful. Fix that up and give me sixe more.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-05-23 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-05-23 Pub. Date: 2019-05-23
Image Number: 177719
Caption: It's the Ask Sadie Advice Hour. Mad in Montauk, you're on. What's your problem?! House of Java .Net Cybercafe. My husband and I are getting divorced, and it's gotten bitter and angry. The problem is, we have 43 mutual friends on Facebook, and he's being do unreasonable about which ones are rightly his. You're arguing over custody of your Facebook friends? What the @#$% is wrong with you people?! Obviously they're all yours. Everyone knows it's usually the woman who created the friendships in the first place. Also, I should get the kids, right?
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-07-01 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-07-01 Pub. Date: 2018-07-01
Image Number: 172353
Caption: I'm not happy. I think I married the wrong person. Dr. Noodle. But I can't leave. Leaving is too hard. I mean, we've got all the same friends. They'd hate me. And she's got complete control of the bank accounts. What would I do for money? But maybe I could just start all over. Who needs any of that stuff? There's a whole world out there. Maybe it's not too late to explore the world, wrestle and alligator, move to Jamaica, change my name, and meet the woman I was really meant to be with. Sometimes it actually is too late. Zzzzzzzz.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-09-01 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-09-01 Pub. Date: 2017-09-01
Image Number: 162091
Caption: Hey, Clyde. Wanna go hang out on the roof? Don’t you do that with Susan? Where she at? She's not talking to me right now. I told her I couldn't just take Joss Whedon's wife's account of their marriage at face value, because people sometimes don't tell the entire truth. Them's your mistake, bruh. You shoulda had just one thing to say 'bout the whole issue: "I don't care 'bout that." I think that's a dangerous philosophy. If something's in the news we've got to care. Wanna know why? I don't care 'bout that.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-08-31 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-08-31 Pub. Date: 2017-08-31
Image Number: 162090
Caption: I got into a Twitter feud wit @joanwalsh. @davidshuster asked her and @joyannreid to apologize for using the term "alt left." I backed him up. When they and @govhowarddean used the term against progressives, they helped validate it. And that helps @realdonaldtrump neutralize the toxicity of the term "alt right" ... which makes it harder to fight white supremacy. I think I won. I'm going to give @govhowarddean a piece of my mind too. Are you @trying to @change-the-subject because you're @losing the @argument about @josswhedon's @divorce? It's just @joss. And I'm @changing-the-subject because it's @none-of-our-business.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-08-30 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-08-30 Pub. Date: 2017-08-30
Image Number: 162089
Caption: What do you mean you don't take Joss Whedon's ex-wife's article at face value? She wrote that he cheated on her for years. That settles everything. No it doesn't. All we heard is her side of the story. And she said at one point she moved away from her personal values to get closer to him. What does that mean. I'll tell you what it might mean: It might mean she knew more than she's letting on, but she was ok with it all the way until he decided to divorce her. Only then did she go back and rewrite history to portray herself as the totally unsuspecting victim. Is this about how your ex lied to the court about you? Is this about how your ex cheated on you?
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-08-13 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-08-13 Pub. Date: 2017-08-13
Image Number: 160919
Caption: Hi momma … What do you mean you've been deported? … Yes, yes, I do know about your love for bean pie. What's that have to do with … Really? ICE raided Muhammad's Bean Pie Shack? … But why would they think you weren't a citizen? … So what if you didn't have ID! This is Ameri -- They did what? They asked you questions to make you prove you're a citizen? ... What questions? ... I see. Listen, momma, when armed goons handcuff you and demand that you tell them who the president it, I don't care what your politics are, you don't answer "Donald Duck." ... Yes, momma, I do see the similarities. But the time for political satire is before they come for you. Not during. Yes, I am flossing regular -- Momma, let me call a lawyer -- Yes, I know, but Cousin Pookie is a divorce attorney. No, it's not the same --
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-12-05 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-12-05 Pub. Date: 2016-12-05
Image Number: 151813
Caption: What ever happened with you and Sasha? Not a thing. Two years ago. But when she wrote to you on Facebook after 14 years, you were so thrilled. Yeah. We ended up talking all day and all night for months, made plans for the future, designed matching tattoos ... but then it turned out she was married with five kids, so that was that. I heard she's now divorced and living in another state. Are you sure "that was that"? Have you ever wondered what's the best way to change a subject?
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-01-24 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-01-24 Pub. Date: 2016-01-24
Image Number: 137727
Caption: I told my wife all about us, Jenny, and she left me. That means we can finally be together, like we wanted. All the things we dreamed about over Facebook can finally come true. We can finally take that long walk along the beach … make love under the night sky on a bed of roses ... dress like big teddy bears and mud-wrestle ... All the beautiful things that we alone dared to dream are finally about to happen, Jenny. No ... this isn't Robert ... No ... this isn't Sam ... Jenny, are you joking with m -- No, this isn't Randy ...
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-02-20 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-02-20 Pub. Date: 2015-02-20
Image Number: 123055
Caption: Hi, Sasha. It's Lemont Brown. I just heard you got divorced. No need to call me back, I just wanted to let you know I'm proud of you for finally leaving that jerk. Things didn't work out between us because of the timing, and we've both moved on, but … I just want you to know I hope you're happy ... because making a pass at you right after I find out you're newly divorced would be a turnoff. Right? Or not? Anyway, farewell. Unless you WANT to call me back.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-02-19 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-02-19 Pub. Date: 2015-02-19
Image Number: 123054
Caption: Why would you ask if I fooled around with Sasha Mitchell? Because you once told me she was the love of your life. Because three years ago, you two were texting and Facebooking all the time. Because you told me you called it off after you found out she was married. ... And because I just found out she's been divorced for two years. There can be only one reason you and she didn't run off together as soon as her divorce was final. Stop trying to put two and two together, you're terrible at math. Homewrecker!
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-02-18 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-02-18 Pub. Date: 2015-02-18
Image Number: 123053
Caption: What ever happened with you and Sasha? Not a thing. But when she wrote to you on Facebook after 14 years, you were so thrilled. Yeah. We ended up talking all day and all night for months, made plans for the future, designed matching tattoos … But then it turned out she was married with five kids, so that was that. I heard she's now divorced and living in another sate. Are you sure "that was that"? Have you ever wondered what's the best way to change a subject?
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-10-17 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-10-17 Pub. Date: 2014-10-17
Image Number: 117633
Caption: So what happened when you took Lionel to visit his mom? I don't know. For some reason, I never remember what happens with her. What? If I were a superhero, my power would be forgetting bad experiences. Dios mio. I wonder if I can sell "Forget-Man" to Hollywood. (This cartoon was originally published on 2012-05-25).
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-08-31 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-08-31 Pub. Date: 2014-08-31
Image Number: 115090
Caption: I called my ex-wife and told her I forgive her for leaving me for Guillermo Cabonabong. Wow. After five years? Something told me it was time to forgive. Well, I told you back then, holding onto resentment is only going to hurt you. I'm glad my advice finally sunk in. It's not that, doc. Yesterday, Facebook suggested I add Guillermo Cabonabong as a friend. I quit. When even Facebook says it's time to move on, it's time to move on.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-04-04 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-04-04 Pub. Date: 2014-04-04
Image Number: 109565
Caption: How come I never see any photos of your son, Lemont? Susan … the custody agreement specifically says I can't show you any pictures of him. His mom despised you. She once said the reason we weren't working out was because I was always comparing her to you in my head. What'd you say back? I said "Susan would never say anything that paranoid."
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-05-25 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-05-25 Pub. Date: 2012-05-25
Image Number: 81181
Caption: So what happened when you took Lionel to visit his mom? I don't know. For some reason, I never remember what happens with her. What? If I were a superhero, my power would be forgetting bad experiences. Dios mio. I wonder if I can sell "Forget-Man" to Hollywood.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-05-16 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-05-16 Pub. Date: 2012-05-16
Image Number: 80977
Caption: So how's Lionel? No, I don’t think I should take him to Roxanne's. After all, I sued to share custody 50-50, because I was raised by a single mom and I know how important a mom is to a son. Not my fault the court gave me sole custody. Um … Ok. I resent your insinuation that I'm doing something wrong.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-12-21 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-12-21 Pub. Date: 2011-12-21
Image Number: 74335
Caption: Are you gonna take Lionel to his mom's house for Christmas? Families should be together on Christmas. I called her. … And I don’t care if she was joking or not, she's pure evil. That's mean. Before hanging up on me, she said she only celebrates Halloween. Still, "evil"? She said they ate lawyer, with all the trimmings.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-12-17 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-12-17 Pub. Date: 2011-12-17
Image Number: 74022
Caption: Goodnight, son. Goodnight, Luther. What did you call me? Luther. Why did you call me "Luther"? Becauth mommy thed that'th your name. Oh. "Loser." That'th what I thed!
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-11-15 divorce 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-11-15 Pub. Date: 2011-11-15
Image Number: 72983
Caption: BTW, where are you, Sasha? Tap tap tap tap tap t- In bed, typing on my iPhone. Webster's snoring. Your husband? But … … the last time we chatted, you said you were about to leave him. Tap tap tap t- I had second thoughts. Maybe it's not so bad. You said you'd packed a dufflebag with your green card, license, $3k in cash and the address of a safe house ... ... after her told you to stop talking to your friends and threatened to fire any of his male employees who so much as smiled at you. Maybe it was just his way of saying "I love you." It was his way of saying "I OWN YOU!" Tap tap t- tap ta- t-
     
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