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Candorville

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Result page:    2  Next  (36 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-11-15 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-11-15 Pub. Date: 2018-11-15
Image Number: 174938
Caption: You're a journalist … You've written a bunch of novels. But have you ever thoughts of writing poetry? Not in a million years. Why not? Wait … is this about what happened in second grade? Of course not, Susan. Just because a young boy stands up in front of the entire school and does a comedy routine in iambic pentameter, and nobody laughs even once ... doesn't mean he'll be traumatized, or anything. It wasn't 'cause it was a poem, Lemont. The room was just a little too old for droll observations about Muppet culture. I've asked you to never say Muppets around me.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-04-05 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-04-05 Pub. Date: 2018-04-05
Image Number: 170151
Caption: 1983. You know what would be really cool? If Eddie Murphy was president. Why Eddie Murphy? Because his State of the Union speeches would be hilarious. He could dress in a leather suit, do funny voices, cuss a lot … The only thing standing in his way is that he's an entertainer. And America is too serious to put an entertainer in charge. Ronald Reagan's in charge now. That's different. Momma says he was never all that entertaining.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-01-10 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-01-10 Pub. Date: 2018-01-10
Image Number: 167091
Caption: Did you see that Dave Chappelle special? I turned it off after he started getting political. Politics has no place in comedy. Not in sitcoms, not in comic strips, not in stand-up routines. Except for Donald Trump. Best insult-comic ever. That guy's hilarious. It's all starting to makes sense. He should've picked Andrew Dice Clay for VP, though.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-12-29 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-12-29 Pub. Date: 2017-12-29
Image Number: 166537
Caption: You do it all the time, bruh. You convinced yourself you loved Justice League an' Batman v Superman. You convinced y'self you like Ghostbusters 2. You convinced y'self you liked From Justice to Kelly … From Justin to Kelly was criminally underrated. I ain't never seen no one so unwilling to admit he got bad taste. As musical romantic comedies starring American Idol competitors go, it was by far the best.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-02-05 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-02-05 Pub. Date: 2017-02-05
Image Number: 153474
Caption: Larry Wilcox ain't happy 'bout that new Chips movie, dawg. Larry who? Larry Wilcox, bruh. Can't believe you ain't remember "Jon" from Chips. Ponch & Jon, bruh, you know. Anyway … I saw the trailer, I laughed, ain't gonna lie. But then I checked his Facebook, like I often do. You do? Often? He pointed out this ain't nothin' like the show he was on. The one we watched when we was kids. An' he right. An' it got me thinkin' about all these reboots. Why they always takin' serious shows an' rebooting them as comedies? Why can't they go the other direction? I think I speak for us all when I say I wanna see a dark, gritty remake of Mr. Belvedere. I'm not sure "us all" means what you think it means.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-02-04 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-02-04 Pub. Date: 2017-02-04
Image Number: 153976
Caption: Mr. Fitzhugh, I'm not happy with the changes you made to that movie trailer I produced for DC. It's supposed to be a light-hearted superhero comedy. And? Yayle. CEO of the Year 2002. And, you somehow made it look all dark and gritty and brutal. And? "Bat-Cow" is not supposed to seem this serious. Let's agree to disagree.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-06-17 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-06-17 Pub. Date: 2016-06-17
Image Number: 144566
Caption: In the wake of what even Republicans have called blatantly racist comments, Donald Trump's campaign may be about to unrave … Click. Experts predict robots will take half of earth's jobs within 30 years. When we tried to reach those experts for comment, their phone lines all went dead. Click. It appears the newly discovered ninth planet is responsible for the comet showers that cause mass extinctions on earth every 26 million years. And we're due for another one right. Click. Gilligaaaaan, the Skipper tooooo ... the millionaaaaire ... and his wiiiiiiiife ...
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-03-03 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-03-03 Pub. Date: 2016-03-03
Image Number: 139627
Caption: 1983. You know what would be really cool? If Eddie Murphy was president. Why Eddie Murphy? Because his State of the Union speeches would be hilarious. He could dress in a leather suit, do funny voices, cuss a lot … The only thing standing in his way is that he's an entertainer. And America is too serious to put an entertainer in charge. Ronald Reagan's in charge now. That's different. Momma says he was never all that entertaining.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-01-11 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-01-11 Pub. Date: 2016-01-11
Image Number: 137663
Caption: North Korea just detonated a hydrogen bomb and warned that it's ready to go to war. Click. An alarming new study proves that something in your apartment is almost certain to cause elbow cancer. Stay tuned to find out what it is. Click. The dwarf planet Ceres seems to have broken orbit and is plummeting straight toward earth. Stay tuned. Click. " ... Gilligaaaan, the Skipper toooo, the millionaire, and his wiiiiiiiiiife ... "
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-06-26 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-06-26 Pub. Date: 2015-06-26
Image Number: 128675
Caption: I wish I could visit the alternate universe where the Kennedy brothers had never been assassinated. In that universe, we never escalated in Vietnam, Nixon was never president, we never ended the Apollo program … I was born on the moon, Carter and Reagan were never presidents, so Iran never turned out to be what it is and we never helped create all these terrorists ... and "Chappelle's Show" never went off the air. You really need to let that go, Lemont.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-04-29 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-04-29 Pub. Date: 2015-04-29
Image Number: 126132
Caption: My son keeps loading 'The Cosby Show' on Hulu. What fo'? Cosby ain't never been funny. He always been boring as @#$% an' I ain't never liked him. Cosby ain't nothin' now, Cosby ain't never been nothin', and I always thought he was creepy. People always try to go back and pretend they were right about someone all along. He ain't never made me laugh. Not even once!
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-04-18 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-04-18 Pub. Date: 2015-04-18
Image Number: 125567
Caption: This just in: The Afghanistan war appears not to be over after all. An American soldier was just … Click. More and more states are passing restrictive voter ID laws, eliminating early voting, and passing other laws that many say will make it harder for black ... Click. In response to California's epic drought, the governor has ordered people to shower no more than once a month ... Click. Gilligaaaan ... The Skipper tooooo ... The millionaire ...
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-02-16 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-02-16 Pub. Date: 2015-02-16
Image Number: 123051
Caption: I still can't believe Jon Stewart is quitting "The Daily Show." Why not? Ain't you never quit no job? Yes. … Wait, no. Wait, that's a double negative. Maybe even a triple. I don't know how to answer that. You open your mouth an let wind come out. For an intelligent dude there an awful lot you ain't be knowin'.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-08-21 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-08-21 Pub. Date: 2014-08-21
Image Number: 115242
Caption: Robin Williams visits Lemont's dream. One of my favorite things in the world was to make you all laugh. I always knew that. You'd combine classy and dirty jokes, wisdom and erudition and throw them at us so fast and from so many different directions … ... it was like you were a new dad trying to get his baby to laugh and think at the same time. Are you trying to say I made you laugh so hard you ... yourself? Let's keep this clean.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-08-19 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-08-19 Pub. Date: 2014-08-19
Image Number: 115240
Caption: Robin Williams visits Lemont's dream. Christopher Reeve. Christopher Reeve? Andy Kaufman. John Belushi. Chris Reeve. My friends. When they died, I had to try to grieve privately for public figures. That was a whole different game. They were so much more than what most people were going to miss them about. So ... bad time to ask you to say "na-nu na-nu"? Never a bad time to ask for words that make you smile, chief.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-12-03 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-12-03 Pub. Date: 2013-12-03
Image Number: 104625
Caption: Did you see Bill Cosby on Comedy Central? Cosby dead to me. He always talkin' 'bout how black men need to raise they kids. But he never say nothin' 'bout why so many DON'T. Thug 4 Life. Black men are four times more likely to be arrested than white men who do the same $%#&, how can you raise a kid when you in jail? Whatever. He was really funny. "Funny" dead to me.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-09-18 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-09-18 Pub. Date: 2013-09-18
Image Number: 101656
Caption: Hey wait, where are you going, Clyde? I'm like Dave Chappelle, I don’t put up with hecklers. Thug 4 Life. Dave Chappelle walked out on his show in Hartford 'cuz that loudmouth audience wouldn’t shut up. They thought they could act a fool an' he'd still perform for them like a trained seal. Well they was WRONG! All I did was ask you for the $2 you owe me. I'M OUT, HECKLER!
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-01-09 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-01-09 Pub. Date: 2012-01-09
Image Number: 75068
Caption: It's annoying when parents are so proud of every little thing their kids do. "Little Preston sat up today!" "Little Lillie smiled!" "Little Raheem made a boom-boom!" They're supposed to do all that. It's not exceptional at all. It's not like they told a really funny joke, like my little Lionel did today.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-02-09 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-02-09 Pub. Date: 2010-02-09
Image Number: 43924
Caption: I don't see why I need a follow-up appointment. You went through something traumatic … … We need to ensure your recovery's on track. Watching all those earthquake victims suffering on my TV was hard. But then "Seinfeld" came on and I was fine. … Or were you referring to that psychotic break I had? Let's back up a second ...
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-01-12 comedy 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-01-12 Pub. Date: 2010-01-12
Image Number: 42958
Caption: So, how are you gonna market my "Jokes About Rush Limbaugh's Heart Troubles" CD? Mr. Gold, I told you before, we don't work for free. Does Armani Gold look like a man who needs a handout? Years ago, I thought ahead and trademarked every possible "But I didn't know Limbaugh had a heart" joke. Dios mio. So far my lawyer's sued half of San Francisco.
     
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