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Candorville

Comics about things that are cheap .

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Result page:    2  Next  (21 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-26 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-26 Pub. Date: 2019-08-26
Image Number: 179191
Caption: Armstrong, why do we have Fourth of July decorations up? That was weeks ago. Exactly. A true patriot loves his country regardless of the date. A true patriot celebrates the founding of our corporatocracy every single day of the year, minion. Some of the decorations are smeared with coffee grounds and banana peels. A true patriot knows that one cafe's dumpster is another cafe's treasure.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-05-24 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-05-24 Pub. Date: 2019-05-24
Image Number: 177720
Caption: Boss … Armstrong … I created a Trump Generator. You input questions, and it outputs random nouns and adverbs strung together with words like fantastic. I put it onling a few days ago, and already it's getting 500,000 visitors per day. I guess what I'm asking is, why do all Trump's answers all of a sudden end with Visit House of Jave Cafe. It's tremendous. It's run by a very smart man named Armstrong. I have no idea what you're talking aboutk. By the way, did you know Russian hackers are suprisingly cheap on Craigslist? Very bad man.!!!
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-01-06 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-01-06 Pub. Date: 2019-01-06
Image Number: 175478
Caption: I'm thinking of buying an income property. That's 'cause I'm already paying one mortgage that I barely qualified for, so I didn't think I'd qualify for another. But YouTube videos told me I'm not supposed to get a new mortgage. I'm supposed to get a home equity line of credit, and use that heloc to pay cash for my investment property. A heloc is usually 80% of the equity a homeowner has in the home. And I have lots of equity. What's lots? 20% of what I bought it for. Wait ... didn't you buy your shack for $8,000? I can get a pretty sweet income property in Chernobyl for 80 percent of $8,000. But your heloc wouldn't be 80% of $8,000. It'd be 80% of 10% of $8,000. Yeah. I figured that out. That's why my realtor and I are scoping out underwater caves off the Siberian coast. That's why you wanted to borrow my scuba gear.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-01-29 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-01-29 Pub. Date: 2017-01-29
Image Number: 153149
Caption: It all started back in college when I bought a copy of "Mimic City." It was cheap: About 20 simoleons. Dr. Noodle. I played it night and day. When "Mimic City 2" came out, I rushed out to buy it. And every few years a newer, better one would come out. Every iteration was more advanced than the last. The little mimics who populated Mimic City came to seem more and more real. They had jobs, and love lives, and had mimic kids, and grew old. Eventually, I started to wonder: If my mimics behave as if they're real ... what if they actually believe they're real? Would that make me their God? And, if they think they're real ... what if I only THINK I'm real? What if I and everyone else in Simkind are actually living in some game called "Sim City"? Not to self: Stop self-medicating, and just to be sure, delete games from phone. Thank you, Almighty Noodle, for listening to my prayers. Amen.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-08-09 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-08-09 Pub. Date: 2016-08-09
Image Number: 147066
Caption: How do I take care of my child, do my work, and still make time to do the things I used to do for fun? C-Dog's Incredibly Bad Advice $2. Your problem is you think you can have e'rethang. Butcha-cain't! Get over it! In life, you ALWAYS gotta pick two outta three. Is that backed up by any studies? Oh, so you want advice cheap, quick and well-informed?
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-12-07 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-12-07 Pub. Date: 2014-12-07
Image Number: 119211
Caption: I'm rewatching J. Michael Straczynski's Babylon 5 for the fifth time, and something's bugging me. The show's all about right vs. wrong and good vs. evil. It's maybe the best morality play ever filmed for tv. Even the goofy comic relief character, Vir Cotto, ends up risking everything to rescue thousands of women and children from a holocaust. In that episode, he personally represents the morality of the entire show. Why, then, did J. Michael Straczynski end the episode with Vir joking that all marriages have problems after he found out his new wife was a raving bigot who had happily taken part in committing that genocide? If even J. Michael Straczynski would ruin his best story by going for a cheap laugh, it's not wonder everything coming out of Hollywood is dumbed down! Explain yourself, J. Michael Straczynski. Who are you and how did you get my phone number? That's not important right now.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-09-25 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-09-25 Pub. Date: 2014-09-25
Image Number: 116764
Caption: My Mac broke down, and I replaced it with a PC, and now I regret it. You should, dawg. Why you didn’t come to me? I coulda hooked you up. I know a guy. He an' I done a lot of business. He coulda set you up with a top-of-the-line system for cheap. Long as you ain't ask too many questions. Would I get a credit for what I'd end up spending on my bail? (A) Don't stereotype, bruh ... an' (2) Yes.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-02-18 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-02-18 Pub. Date: 2014-02-18
Image Number: 107707
Caption: How do I take care of my child, do my work, and STILL make time to do the things I used to do for fun? C-Dog's Incredibly Bad Advice. $2. Your problem is you think you can have e'rthang. BUTCHA-CAIN'T! Get over it! In life, you ALWAYS gotta pick two outta three. Is that backed up by any studies? Oh, so you want advice cheap, quick and well-informed?
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-01-19 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-01-19 Pub. Date: 2014-01-19
Image Number: 105925
Caption: 1982. Do you want to see "E.T.," Lemont? Momma says we can't afford it. I could probably see "Porky's" though. Momma says that movie's "really cheap." But when I asked her about it, she like … totally flipped out. So thin I asked her if I could see "Tootsie." After all, I do love Tootsie Rolls, so ... She flipped out about that too. Said somethin' about "cross-dressing" being wrong. What's "cross-dressing"? I assume that has something to do with the civil rights movement. You mom never makes any sense, Lemont. When I'm a grown-up, I may have to have her committed.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-08-04 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-08-04 Pub. Date: 2012-08-04
Image Number: 84698
Caption: Seriously, you should think about buying. Cardboard'll never be this cheap again. This end.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-07-10 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-07-10 Pub. Date: 2011-07-10
Image Number: 63062
Caption: My brother's buying a house. I didn't know that was really possible. We never owned anything growing up. We couldn't afford books, so we'd go to the library. We couldn’t afford a car so we'd take the bus ... We come from a long line of renters. I'd convinced myself it had to be that way. After all we're all only renting our time on this earth anyway. Ownership is a delusion. The only thing we can really own is our soul. I see. You're wondering if you can conquer the limits you've placed on yourself, like your brother did. I'm wondering if my brother will rent me his basement cheap.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-11-04 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-11-04 Pub. Date: 2010-11-04
Image Number: 53693
Caption: Hello, you've reached "The Law Guy." Hi, Little Billy? I’m calling to find out the status of my custody battle against Roxanne. May I speak with your Uncle Loafer? This is Loafer. No it isn't. I know the difference between the voice of a grown-up and the voice of a six-year-do. I am a grown-up. In fact, you've interrupted me doing my taxes, or watching "Price is Right," or some other boring @#$%. I'm starting to think I should've picked the second cheapest law firm. I am my Uncle and you cannot prove otherwise.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-06-12 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-06-12 Pub. Date: 2010-06-12
Image Number: 48213
Caption: Seriously, you should think about buying. Cardboard'll never be this cheap again.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-04-01 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-04-01 Pub. Date: 2010-04-01
Image Number: 45682
Caption: I saw your profile on a Date - a - chick.com, "Captain Sisko." You have no proof that's MY profile, Susan. It said you want a woman who's a cross between Beyonce and Princess Amidala. PRINCESS LEIA!!! Amidala was just a cheap, two-dimensional plot device that ... I rest my case. You play dirty.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-12-21 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-12-21 Pub. Date: 2008-12-21
Image Number: 28939
Caption: So you're saying you delivered all the gifts last summer. I figured the cost of reindeer fuel would skyrocket in December. Lichen's cheaper in the off-season. Of course. Anyway, I delivered Xboxes, iPods, the works. But just this week, kids from all over the world sent me their wishes. They don't want iPods. They want their mommies and daddies to have their jobs and their homes back. I see. And you feel you've crushed their dreams, condemning them to lives of bitterness and despair. Actually, I was wondering why I'm such a tightwad, but thanks for giving me another complex.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-08-31 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-08-31 Pub. Date: 2008-08-31
Image Number: 26243
Caption: In this economy, off-peak travel is much more affordable.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-05-21 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-05-22 Pub. Date: 2007-05-21
Image Number: 17316
Caption: What do you see when you look at the clouds, Susan? I see… "The crazy vegetarian chick said she'll marry me, Susan, but I'm never allowed to see you again. "Peace out, Lemont." Skywriting is surprisingly cheap if you cut deals. "Dumped by your best friend? Buy Kleenex."
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-05-09 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-05-09 Pub. Date: 2007-05-09
Image Number: 17176
Caption: Tell me more about the future, future me. It's 2007, right? Let's put it this way… Remember how astronomers just discovered a planet light years away that might be habitable? Uh-huh. Remember the movie "Alien"? In 2047, if someone offers you a cheap vacation package to Libra, you say "No." Good talk, future me.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2006-09-09 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2006-09-14 Pub. Date: 2006-09-09
Image Number: 14637
Caption: Minorities don't tip well, so I'm not gonna bother giving this guy good service. This guy never gives good service, so I'm not gonna bother to tip him.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2005-11-26 cheap 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2005-11-28 Pub. Date: 2005-11-26
Image Number: 12291
Caption: Lemont, you can't freak out every time some other blogger says you're a bad writer. They think it makes them look cool if they say everything else is lame. They try to build themselves up by tearing others down. It's lazy and cheap. You're much better than they are. Note to self: Scrap tomorrow's blog entry.
     
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