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The Alpha Male Comic Strips

gathered from over thirty leading newspaper comic strips.

These are available for you to license for books, magazines, newsletters, presentations and websites.
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Result page:    2  Next  (39 images)


1. Comic Strip Jerry Van Amerongen  Ballard Street 2008-05-19 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Jerry Van Amerongen
Comic/Cartoon: Ballard Street
Viewable Date: 2019-09-26 Pub. Date: 2008-05-19
Image Number: 23467
Caption: Somewhere down the block, Ted lost his pack leader privileges.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-28 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-28 Pub. Date: 2019-08-28
Image Number: 179193
Caption: Joe Biden keeps doing strange things … like saying he worked with segregationists to get things done. What was he thinking? It's as if he's trying to sabotage his own campaign. He must've never read my book: The Alpha Male's Guide to Not Lousing everything Up. Is that your book that just says go home on every page?
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-11-29 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-11-29 Pub. Date: 2018-11-29
Image Number: 175157
Caption: Did you catch the Ask Sadie Show? They were talking about immortality. You're interrupting today's How to be an Alpha lesson, little buddy. They said that in just 30 years, we'll be able to transfer our minds to a server, shoot it into deep space where the cold will help the hard drive to survive for eons, and live in a virtual. But what if we've already done that? What if it's like the Matrix, or like Elon Musk's theories, and nothing we see is really real? What if right now, we're in a hard drive orbiting Ur ... As I was saying ... Alphas don't tell Uranus jokes.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-07-14 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-07-14 Pub. Date: 2018-07-14
Image Number: 172718
Caption: At the refugee jail. Look on the bright side, little buddy. Now's your chance to get prison-ripped. What? I'm writing a new book in the "Randy's Manuals" series. It's called "The Alpha Male's Guide to Jail." Chapter six is all aobut using the two hours a day of yard-time to develop titanium buns. I'm not sure this'll be a best-seller. You kidding? We jail more people that any country in the entire world.
     
5. Comic Strip Jerry Van Amerongen  Ballard Street 2007-08-21 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Jerry Van Amerongen
Comic/Cartoon: Ballard Street
Viewable Date: 2018-05-17 Pub. Date: 2007-08-21
Image Number: 20275
Caption: Stephen is aggressive toward two or three kinds of small dogs.
     
6. Comic Strip Jerry Van Amerongen  Ballard Street 2007-07-02 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Jerry Van Amerongen
Comic/Cartoon: Ballard Street
Viewable Date: 2018-03-13 Pub. Date: 2007-07-02
Image Number: 20172
Caption: Take over the pack today, Murphy.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-03-01 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-03-01 Pub. Date: 2018-03-01
Image Number: 168936
Caption: If you could change just one thing about yourself, what would it be? I'd totally wish to have my brain put into a robot body. That way I could live forever. Imagine living long enough to buy an iPhone 7000. Wrong answer. An alpha male never lets on that he's concerned about his mortality. You answer should have been nothing. That alpha male or female is not afraid of death, little buddy. I think I'd rather wait for the 7000-S. Stop it.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-01-31 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-01-31 Pub. Date: 2018-01-31
Image Number: 167931
Caption: Let me tell you a story: The year was 1988. I was living in Detroit at the time. A young man named Matt Bennett spilled a drop of coffee on my shoe. He apologized profusely. I said, That's ok, dear, and we got to chatting. Turned out he was organizing a campaign stop for Michael Dukakis. So I told him You know what would make be vote for your boss? Show us he's tough. Maybe put him in a tank, and put a huge helmet on him. Show me he's an alpha male. I said I was sorry for spilling your tea. I will ruin you.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-14 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-14 Pub. Date: 2016-12-14
Image Number: 152124
Caption: Today's alpha-lesson is "Keep a journal." The average person lets life pass them by. The events of their lives fade into nothingness. An alpha knows that long after they're gone, their thoughts and experiences will be of great interest to historians. That's not an original thought. I read it in the papyrus Randus Maximus XIV left in a safe deposit box after he helped conquer Judea.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-11-29 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-11-29 Pub. Date: 2016-11-29
Image Number: 151569
Caption: I'm dropping you. I'm no longer going to be your personal "alpha male" trainer. What?! But … but … but I need you, Randy! I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have you to teach me. I'm nothing without you. Nothing! Great scott … it's like you didn't even read chapter one: Reject the Rejector. I can see we have a lot more work to do. Um ... I mean "Whatever. See you around."
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-11-28 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-11-28 Pub. Date: 2016-11-28
Image Number: 151568
Caption: Little buddy, you asked me to make sure you're following every step in "Randy's Guide to Being an Alpha Male." Go away, Randy! Have you read chapter 14? It's called "Yes, they are noticing how long you spend in the john." Go away! A decisive man has decisive bowels. Go away!
     
12. Comic Strip Jerry Van Amerongen  Ballard Street 2016-11-16 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Jerry Van Amerongen
Comic/Cartoon: Ballard Street
Viewable Date: 2016-11-16 Pub. Date: 2016-11-16
Image Number: 150511
Caption: More complaints about improper provisioning by the pack leader.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-10-08 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-10-08 Pub. Date: 2016-10-08
Image Number: 149323
Caption: Think I'll be a more effective alpha male if I learn to play pool? That's one of those things you always see an alpha male do: Stand around a pool hall polishing his stick and racking up the balls … sizing up his shot, like he's secretly a geometric wizard who's about to make the whole world line up the way he wants it to with just one whack. Or maybe I should take up darts, where I myself become an extension of the missile I'm launching. Any sport in the bar family works.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-07-13 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-07-13 Pub. Date: 2016-07-13
Image Number: 145830
Caption: Bill Clinton keeps doing strange things. … like meeting with the attorney general in private while his wife's under investigation. What was he thinking? It's as if he's trying to sabotage Hillary's campaign. He must've never read my book: The Alpha Male's Guide to Not Lousing Everything Up. Is that your book that just says "go home" on every page?
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-06-24 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-06-24 Pub. Date: 2016-06-24
Image Number: 144913
Caption: Today's alpha-lesson is "Become a Vapor." Wherever you are, be it a broom closet or a baseball stadium, carry yourself as if your body fills the entire place. Greet people with you arms out wide. Have a wide stance. A booming laugh. A wide-open smile. Becoming a vapor is the best and most legal way to mark your territory.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-05-25 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-05-25 Pub. Date: 2016-05-25
Image Number: 143657
Caption: I've been giving some more thought to your question about in which era in history I'd most like to live. You have? I thought you never change your mind about anything. This is true. Randy's alpha male or female rule number 1: "Make a decision and stick with it even it it's really dumb." HOJ. " ... Appearing indecisive is the kiss of death." But you're forgetting the corollary ... "If you do change your mind, claim you've always believed as you do now." " ... and anyone who thinks otherwise is crazy." Can't believe I forgot that part.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-04-06 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-04-06 Pub. Date: 2016-04-06
Image Number: 141527
Caption: I'm announcing the debut of my new manual: "Randy's Movie-Watching for Alphas." Chapter One: The critics are all wrong … or the critics are all right. You wouldn't know, because you don't pay any attention to film critics. You make up your own mind. Chapter Two: The snack bar doesn't exist to you. You're not some horse feeding at a trough.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-03-16 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-03-16 Pub. Date: 2016-03-16
Image Number: 140511
Caption: Why do you keep walking two feet ahead of me, Clyde? I don't know what you talkin' 'bout, Big L. It's almost like you're trying to put on some primal show of dominance. Like you're trying to be the alpha male here. You always over-thinkin' things, bruh. Then how come you sped up as soon as I got next to you? Two words: "Your" an' "breath." ... an' "stank."
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-01-21 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-01-21 Pub. Date: 2016-01-21
Image Number: 137965
Caption: If you could change just one thing about yourself, what would it be? I'd totally wish to have my brain put into a robot body. That way I could live forever. Imagine living long enough to buy an iPhone 7000. Wrong answer. An alpha male never lets on that he's concerned about mortality. Your answer should have been "nothing." The alpha male or female is not afraid of death, little buddy. I think I'd rather wait for the 7000-s. Stop it.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-09-15 alpha male 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-09-15 Pub. Date: 2015-09-15
Image Number: 132591
Caption: Armstrong fired me. I kind of wish I knew why. Who cares why? A real alpha doesn't let himself get fired, little buddy. What you should've done was fire your boss before he had a chance to fire you. That way, thoughts of everything he'd lose would flood his brain and there's a 48.7% chance he'd actually beg you to stay. Isn't that the same number from your book "From Dump-ee to Beg-ee"? Work, romance ... it doesn't matter. All the relationships are the same.
     
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